The Duke and the Dove
by Shelindrea
Summary: Jacob is an Earl in line for his father's title and lands. His father orders him to marry within the month or lose his inheritance. Nessie is an orphan raised in the most exclusive brothel in London. On the eve of her becoming a dove Jacob rescues her and decides that marrying her will save them both.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

JPOV

"That is outrageous!" I roared.

"Never-the-less, those are my terms," my father said with an iron edge to his voice.

"That is blackmail, pure and simple."

"That it is. Still it is the condition to your inheriting from me. I have the right as neither the title, nor the land, nor has one ha'penny been entitled away. I am free to bestow them upon whomever I choose. Your cousin Samuel would make a fine Duke. He is cool headed and already married to a charming girl. Why should I not choose him?"

"Perhaps because I am your son?" I pleaded.

"Yes, you are, and that is why I am giving you a month to meet my condition. Find yourself a wife, Jacob. Marry her and secure a future with children for me. Then and only then will I write the will you desire. Being told that my time may be short has forced me to this. I cannot in good conscience leave the title and lands to someone who is not prepared to be responsible and level headed. Too many people rely on me for their livelihood for me to simply give you the title without ensuring their safety."

"Just how does my marrying some desperate female protect your tenants?"

"She does not need to be desperate. She simply needs to be willing to wed you within the next month. I would venture that as you are spoken of as the most eligible bachelor in all of London that there are any number of women willing to be your bride." He seemed rather proud about that fact, but not in the way I was.

For me it meant that I had my choice of mistresses and that I never lacked for female company. For him it meant I should have an easier time shackling my leg for his amusement.

"But Papa…" I began. I sounded like a whining child and that would not do. "I do not wish to wed yet."

"I do not wish to die either. Not everything in life is as we would have it be. You have my word, if you wed within the next month I shall pass everything to you. If not, Sam will get it all."

I knew my father well enough to know when arguing was fruitless. He had made his decision and I would suffer the consequences. I bowed an exit and went off to the club to drown my sorrows in the company of like-minded friends.

When I entered the card room it was abuzz with lively conversation. I saw several of my friends and walked over to them.

"Are you certain? I mean how can one be sure?" Embry asked.

"She was raised in the nunnery. Not a soul has had her yet. The auction begins at ten," Quil explained.

It was clear they spoke of a woman of the night, but I had only heard of these auctions in passing. I had no experience in them.

"I'll be there," Paul bragged, "for curiosity's sake if nothing else."

"She is a beauty, I can attest to that," Quil said.

"I wonder at the price she will raise," Embry said.

"Who is this budding virgin?" I inquired.

"Oh, Jacob," said Quil in greeting. "I wonder at your not knowing, after all, the chit almost always seeks you out when you visit Mrs. Cope's establishment."

"There are many of Mrs. Cope's girls who have shared my bed of an evening. None of which could claim purity," I laughed.

"It is young Renesmee," Quil confessed much to my displeasure.

"Renesmee?" I thought for a moment and suddenly I knew exactly who he meant. "You mean Nessie?!"

"Aye, I do."

Without thought I charged the man and bid him deny it. It took the other two to disentangle me and in the end Embry led me away from him attempting to dissuade my ire.

"What ails you, Jacob?" Embry inquired.

"Ness is a mere child. She has no business being turned out."

"She is of age, Jacob, whether you know it or not. If you are so concerned perhaps you should attend the auction and see to it she is not won by someone who would do her harm."

I thought on that. Little Ness had been about the house for as long as I had given Mrs. Cope my custom. Some twelve years. I had come across her one evening after extricating myself from the arms of Lauren Mallory, one of the most accomplished members of Mrs. Cope's house. I had gotten hungry and had gone to the kitchen to pinch a piece of fruit. Having accomplished that end I wandered out to the arboretum. I sat by the pond and ate in silence until I heard a soft "umph" from above. There hanging from a low branch was a young girl with coppery braids, hanging upside-down very precariously.

"Do you require some assistance, Miss?" I asked her.

She thought for a moment before answering. "If you please," she said very politely.

I came beneath her and eased her slight weight from the branch. In a moment she was safely in my arms and then securely placed upon her dainty feet. Once I was certain she had her feet beneath her I released her and bowed elegantly.

"Oh, thank you ever-so-much, sir. I am exceedingly grateful to you."

"It was my pleasure, Miss?"

"Oh, I am called Renesmee," she said curtseying slightly.

"I am Lord Black, Lady Renesmee. It is a great pleasure to make your acquaintance."

She giggled lightly and I noticed the pleasing sound she made. She was quite young. I would have wagered she was no more than eight. "What is your role in this house, my lady?" I asked continuing the use of title for the girl.

"Oh," she bit her lower lip, "Mrs. Cope says currently I am a drain on resources."

I laughed out loud. The child was a delight. "Why is that?"

"Mrs. says that I was dropped off here by my mum, though I don't remember her. She says that one day I will be worth my weight in coin, but until then I am to learn from the girls and to make myself useful as she sees fit."

"And how do you do that?"

"I do some sewing, and I dress the girl's hair. I help in the kitchen, too."

"Then I should think you more than earn your keep."

She shrugged. Then she scampered off when she heard a bell toll. It was our first meeting, but hardly our last. I found her delightful and came to seek out her company when I had concluded my business above stairs.

We started having visits in the arboretum of an evening. She would wait for me by the pond and we would talk and laugh. She was bright and articulate. I found her curious and intelligent so I often brought her books. She would read them and then we would discuss them.

It was early on that I deemed her name far too grand for such a small person. I discovered that she was only six, ten years my junior. I continued to tease her by calling her "my lady" and she ate it up, but after a month or so I began to call her "Nessie." She loved the name, and soon the entire house was utilizing it.

After a year or two, Ness began to train in entertainments for the visiting gentlemen. Mrs. Cope the Madam of this high class brothel never kept anyone or anything that did not earn her coin. Nessie was in danger of being thrown to the streets when I discovered that the child could sing. I paid for a music master to come and train her and suggested Mrs. Cope utilize her to entertain the waiting gentlemen below stairs. Nessie was talented and charming. The gentlemen often paid her to sing their favorite songs or to play so that they could dance with the doves of the house.

She flourished in her new role. She had been fulfilling it since she was thirteen. I had visited Mrs. Cope's establishment from time to time over the years. I often called during the day to visit with Ness as the doves slept during the day and it meant I was not obligated to indulge in them while there.

I had taken to keeping a mistress of my own as I aged. They were safer than frequenting the doves, no matter the status of the house to which they belonged. They cost about the same, in lodgings and gifts, and they were at your disposal whenever you required them. It also made me feel less uncomfortable around Ness as she grew into understanding of exactly what occurred with the doves above stairs.

Despite her living in a high class brothel, Nessie retained the untarnished air of a child in my eyes. She was sweet and biddable, and had not the hard edges that I often found in the girls who made their living on their backs.

True it had been some time since I had last seen her. I had been abroad with my regiment for a year and a half. We had fought to bring down Boney and had only returned six months ago. Father's illness had occupied much of my time. He had had a stroke and although he was recovering the physician had not been optimistic about his future.

Still, it had not been that long that I had been gone. Ness was a child and I would be damned before I saw her turned out as a harlot simply because Mrs. Cope thought she would fetch a price.

I bid Embry accompany me to the brothel. I wanted him there to keep me from killing the woman should it come to that. The foyer had not changed an iota since last I had been there. It was all dark wood and red curtains. For the first time I found it stifling and garish. I asked to see Mrs. Cope and was ushered into her private salon.

"Well, my lord Black, it has been too long. Please take a seat and tell me what I can do for ye," the aging madam said pouring Embry and I each a glass of port.

Embry took a seat while I paced about the room. "Mrs. Cope, a disturbing rumor has come to my attention, and I came here at once to discover the truth of it."

"What rumor would that be, my lord?"

"There is word of an auction here this evening, Ma'am. It is said you have a virgin for sale," Embry began, to calm the situation.

"Indeed I do," the older woman bragged. "As sweet a strawberry tart as you will ever find, and guaranteed untouched. I am providing viewing for interested parties. Would you like me to call her?"

My hands fisted and Embry sent me a quelling look as he smiled and made polite noises at the madam. "I would enjoy having a look. I like to know what I am bidding for in advance."

Mrs. Cope pulled a chord that rang a bell somewhere in the house and we waited. It was not long before a respectful knock came at the door. "Come!" ordered the crone and in walked the most beautiful woman I had ever beheld.

It took me a moment to realize that the vision before me was my very own Ness. She was taller, not tall, but not as small as I remembered. Her long golden copper hair was piled upon her head and then spilled down her back in riotous curls. Her figure was lush and womanly, draped in a gauzy white gown that highlighted her porcelain complexion. She took my breath away. She was all the Nessie I remembered and much more. Her eyes were downcast; she did not look at either me or Embry.

"There's a good girl. Now turn round for the gentlemen. They want to view the merchandise," Mrs. Cope said.

Ness turned slowly round her eyes on the floor. I signaled Embry to remove Mrs. Cope and he obliged well. "My dear Mrs. Cope, I believe that you may be able to provide me with some distraction while I am here. Will you take me out to see the delights your house has to offer?"

"Well, now… I do not know that leaving my sweet alone with Lord Black is wise…"

"I shall be on my best behavior," I promised.

Embry flashed his wallet at the woman and she escorted him from the room leaving me alone with the newly minted woman before me. Her eyes were still glued to the floor and her body was rigid. I walked around her slowly knowing that she felt exposed.

"Is there something I can do for you, Sir?" she asked, her voice somewhat husky and incredibly appealing.

"Well… you could tell me how you have come to this, little bird?" I said utilizing the pet name I had always used for her.

In a flash her eyes were staring to my own. They were wide with confusion and was that relief? "Jacob?" she asked her voice rife with disbelief.

"It is I," I assured her. I opened my arms to her expecting her to launch herself at me as she always had, but she remained still. "What, no welcoming kiss for an old friend?"

"Friends generally keep in touch more often than once in nearly two years. I fear you mistake our acquaintance, my lord." Her tone was clipped, but I sensed the hurt behind her jibe.

"My apologies, I have been remiss. Still, I came as soon as I heard about this auction. I came to rescue you from this life."

Her brow furrowed. Then I saw anger light her eyes. "What makes you think I require rescuing?"

"You are about to become one of the doves above stairs. Of course you need rescuing. You cannot want this." I reasoned.

"I am not to be a dove of the house. I am looking for a protector, someone who can pay my debt to Mrs. Cope and free me from her clutches. I aim to leave this place tonight, and I plan never to return."

"You are willing to sell yourself for that privilege?"

"It is all that is mine to sell."

"How much does she claim you owe?"

"Mrs. Cope claims three thousand pounds for room, board, and education. The auction is to raise those funds and secure me exclusively for six months. Then I will be free and I swear this house will never see my face again." The tilt of her chin was defiant and proud, yet the quiver in her voice was that of a frightened child.

"I will pay her that and a thousand more." I swore.

"Why would you do that?"

"Because I have need of you Ness. Will you accept my offer?"

"I… You want me as your Mistress? I thought you objected to my choosing this life."

"I do object, that is why I want you. Will you agree to do as I say, if I promise to save you from this life?"

"How is taking me as your mistress saving me?"

"I am not taking you as mistress Ness, I am taking you as my wife."


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note: I wanted to thank all of you who reviewed and asked for a quick update. I have 16 chapter may have to wait. With that in mind, here is chapter 2.

Many thanks to Dixie my pre-reader, w/o her I would not be the writer you see.

Chapter 2

NPOV

I stood in the center of the room completely certain that I had dreamt the last words I heard. This was not happening. I had had similar dreams about this man since I was a child. Jacob Black, Earl of Wolfsbridge, and future Duke of La Push, had been my hero from the moment I met him. He rescued me from a tree and captured my heart.

He befriended a waif of a child so far below his station she should not have ever caught his attention. He was kind and gentle to her and brought her gifts of sweets and later books. He had arranged for her to have a music master so she could learn to sing and play, and all this he did without any true connection to her. He had treated her like an equal and made her feel that she had a right to happiness and gentility.

That child was me, Renesmee, a lowly throw away child who hailed from the streets. I was even less than the harlots I served for they worked to earn their keep. They had beauty and skills which recommended them to the gentlemen who passed through the doors. I had none. That is until His Lordship took notice of me. He told me often that I was worth a hundred of the 'ladies' from above stairs. He had insisted I could be taught and be made useful in ways other than drudgery and discomfort.

He had lit the flame within me that burned to this day, the flame of hope, for a better life, for a future, for love. He was my ideal, my champion, and my fantasy. I supposed it was only right, that on this, the night my dreams would come to a crashing halt, I would dream of the one man who I had always believed could save me. Still, I knew it was a dream, for no matter how hard I had prayed over the last two years he had not come. He had not written. He had not even said farewell. He had sent a book with a note saying it would be the last for some time because he would be on the continent fighting Boney. I had wept for a month. I had begged my music master to find a way for me to write him and keep myself connected to him any way I could. I had written a letter every day for six months. Not once did I receive a response. Then the letters began to return to me. By the time he was gone a year I had given up all hope of ever seeing him again.

The Missus had decided about the time I turned sixteen to turn me out as one of her girls. I convinced her that were she to wait for Jacob's return she might be able to fetch a king's ransom for me. After all, I could sing and play and would make a fine mistress. The idea intrigued her. Those houses that provided the gentry with Mistresses earned a fee to cover a six month period. If the woman was successful, it could earn the house a bonus. I had lied for seven months telling her that Jacob had sworn that he would be my first, and would pay generously for the privilege. Then Lauren had come home one day and announced that His Lordship had returned and that all the street was abuzz with the news.

Mrs. Cope waited another two months for his return to our door, and then she announced that to recoup the monies she had wasted on keeping me beneath her roof while I refused to earn her money she would auction me off to the highest bidder.

All hope of a reprieve died after the auction was announced and gentlemen were booking time for a chance to inspect me. There had been too many to count in and out of the brothel's doors and I became more and more certain that my future had been written. I would become a harlot and would live out my days peddling my body to earn my keep.

Oh I still dreamt of Jacob. In my dreams he returned for me. He found me beautiful, and he refused to allow me to be used by anyone. He would take me from this house and keep me as his own. We would lie together and he would never let me go.

But even I never dared to dream a scenario like this. I knew that a gentleman would never seek me as his bride. He was too far above me to even imagine that he would have truly considered me as his mistress, no matter how much I wanted him to. My dreams had become more fevered and more desperate as this night drew closer. It was clear I had crossed the line into madness.

I wondered for a moment if landing in bedlam would save me from the fate that awaited me this night. I felt my heart break as I repeated his words over and over in my mind "I am not taking you as mistress Ness. I am taking you as my wife."

Hysterical laughter escaped my lips as I sank to the floor and wept. What a fool I was to torture myself this way. There was no escape from this. I was about to become a whore, no matter how fancy the house I resided in. How cruel my mind was to even dare to imagine that the man I adored would have me.

I felt gentle hands wrap round my wrists and ease my hands from my face. When I opened my eyes his face swam before them. "Do you not wish to wed me, Ness? Do you wish to be freed without obligation to me?"

I furrowed my brow trying to understand this strange twist in my imagination. "What?"

"I am determined to take you from this place no matter your answer, but I must admit your agreeing to my proposal would save me a great deal of grief."

I blinked at the handsome face before me, trying to determine if he was indeed real. Finally I reached out my palm to cup his face. I felt the prickle of the stubble upon his cheek. I saw the corners of his eyes crinkle as he smiled that blessed smile. The dimple in his chin deepened and the smaller one's dented his cheeks. "Are you real?"

"As real as I have ever been," he assured me. "Now answer me, will you consent to marry me, or should I find you a position somewhere else, somewhere that you will be safe and where you will not be bought or sold."

"I will go anywhere with you and be anything you wish me to be," I vowed.

He smiled again and gently eased me from the floor. He took me to the settee and bid me wait for his return. In a few moments he, his friend, and Mrs. Cope returned. Mrs. Cope was in high dudgeon and shaking her head vehemently.

"Absolutely not! I have spent a great deal of effort on this auction, my Lord. I am certain that the girl will fetch a vast price. Besides, were I to let her go to you I would have a great many gentlemen who would likely feel duped. They would want my head, rather than them feeling the need to take comfort for their loss in the arms of my other girls. I am like to make five thousand pounds this night alone, and then they will line up round the block to bed this beauty," Mrs. Cope explained.

"Five thousand, you say?"

"Aye"

"Then let us make it ten, and call it a day."

"You would pay ten thousand for her?" Mrs. Cope's eyes were bulging at the mere thought of that much coin.

"I would on one condition."

"Aye, here it comes," she said suspiciously.

"You never attempt to contact her again. This erases any debt the girl has incurred and frees her forthwith and it must be put in writing."

Missus' eyes narrowed and she looked as if she were calculating how much I could earn for her in my lifetime. Most of the girls here worked until they were thirty, then she tossed them out on their ears. She often said they were no use to her once they began to show 'wear and tear.' I was already older than she usually started girls. She would have fewer years to thrust me at the gentlemen who frequented her establishment, and waiting had cost her aggravation and in her mind money.

"What do I tell the gentlemen who are coming here tonight to bid for a taste of her?"

"I am certain you have at least one other virgin about. Sell her. It will make you double the profit, and save your face."

"Why not keep them both and let you see if you are outbid?"

"Because this offer expires in five minutes. If you pass up this money, I will take Nessie and leave you nothing," he said matter-of-factly.

"You cannot deprive me of my livelihood sir. The girl is mine. I have the papers to prove it. I bought her debt from the poor house. She is my property."

"No Madam, I am afraid you are mistaken. I have made you a generous offer, take it. Otherwise Nessie will go with me, and should you attempt to contact or harass her I shall put the law on you."

"What of it? I told you I have the paper proving she is mine."

"My friend here," he said indicating his companion "is a highly respected solicitor. He can tell you that you would fail to win such a case in court."

"You cannot legally own a person, Madam. In fact, I should imagine that I could wage charges on you for any number of illegal practices going on within this establishment. Imagine how that might affect business."

"You are a cruel man, m'lord. I will take that ten-thousand pounds."

"I thought you might." Jacob handed her a wad of bank notes and turned again to me. "You will need to find a dress suitable to be on the street, Sweeting. We will get you a modiste as soon as possible, but you cannot go out in that."

Twenty minutes later I was dressed in one of the chambermaid's dresses and hustled out into a waiting carriage. Somehow I was still certain I would awaken from this impossible dream, but I refused to speak and ruin it for myself. We rode from the east end to the poshest neighbourhood I had ever seen. Fine townhouses rose up with decorative bushes and wrought iron gates. The street itself was clean enough to eat off of, and the people walking about had clean crisp clothes, and sparking shoes.

I gaped out the window amazed at the sights and sounds. We pulled up to a fine edifice and Jacob's friend descended the steps onto the pavement. Then Jacob followed, turned and offered me his hand to alight from the carriage. He tucked my hand into his elbow and led me up the stairs to the solid oak door. It opened before either gentleman knocked and a rather distinguished butler stood to allow us entrance.

"Good day, m'lords and Miss," said the servant.

"Good day, Bertie. This is…" he turned to me searching for a means of introduction. I could see he was embarrassed. I would have offered him help were I capable of speech, but as it was I was so frightened that the dream would end badly I simply faded back from him. "This is Miss Cherish. She is a fine lady, and is to receive the finest of everything. Is that understood?"

"Of course, m'lord. Is there anything the lady requires at the moment?"

"No, thank you," I squeaked.

"I will need to send a message in a bit, Bertie. See that one of the lads is available."

"As you wish, Sir," the butler clicked his heals and stepped back.

"Oh and I believe a spot of tea and biscuits would not go amiss. Have them brought to the drawing room."

"As you wish, Sir."

Jacob stepped forward and took my hand in his own. "Come along, Sweet." He led me up the staircase and down a long hall into a beautifully appointed room. It had dark wood and a welcoming fire. He sat me on a sofa and took the seat next to me. His friend took a seat in a wing-backed chair to our left.

"Well, that was an exciting afternoon," his friend chortled.

"And profitable," Jacob said grinning.

"Well, it was certainly profitable for Mrs. Cope," I said matter-of-factly.

Both gentlemen laughed heartily. "She has a quick wit, I'll give you that," the friend said.

"That she does," Jacob agreed. Then he took my hands in his own and turned to face me. "Now, Ness, we need to come to some understanding between us."

I sat rigidly awaiting the pronouncement of my fate. It was certain that the dream was coming to an end. I swallowed and closed my eyes awaiting the blow.

"I meant what I said back there. I will not force you to wed me should you not wish to."

I cracked my lids just enough to see his handsome face. It looked expectant and anxious. I had no inkling as to the answer he desired.

"You cannot tell me that you wish to be a harlot?"

"God no!" I declared standing.

"You were ever a good girl," he stated, "ever-so-much better than anyone in that house." I sank back onto the couch and he again took my hands in his own. Mine were swallowed by his larger hands, and appeared pale in his olive skinned fingers. "So, I am in need of a wife. I must be married by the end of the month. It would settle my nerves a great deal if you would consent to be my bride."

Unbidden I found my voice. "Why me?" I blurted out inelegantly.

"As I said I require a bride. In fact I require one within the month."


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: The response to this fic has already overwhelmed me. You have all been so generous with your reviews that I feel I must update as quickly as I can to maintain your interest. Here is the next chapter.

Chapter 3

JPOV

"As I said I require a bride. In fact I require one within the month," I announced.

Her big golden brown eyes sought my own as she tilted her head. "Surely there are any number of eligible ladies from whom to choose. What would possess you to seek out a girl from a brothel as your future mate?"

She was right. There were a veritable ton of clawing debutants vying for my hand, as well as scheming mamas ready to entrap me in word or deed into marrying their daughters. That was precisely the reason I refused them all. I had always believed that relations between men and women should be amusing, mutually engaging, and free of ugly emotions. I had had a bevy of doves perched upon my lap, and a few enjoyable mistresses, but they were employed, not adored. I had no desire to become part of a love affair in which I lost control. I had seen far too many of my friends bled dry by needy women.

Only my blessed mother had been worthy of true affection and even she had left my father and me. The fault was not hers, for she fought the lung condition with everything she had, but in the end she had deserted us. My father's health suffered for it. He was bereft without her and I had thought for some time that he was biding his time until he could join her in death. I did not ever wish to feel that way. That was why I had sought an arrangement that would provide an even partnership.

"I believe that you and I could have a measure of happiness together, each of us benefitting each other. I have ever been fond of you, Ness. I believe we have always had a good rapport. Marrying me will keep you from having to debase yourself to anyone, and will provide me with companionship, and hopefully an heir. It is that simple."

She licked her lips, an action that I found most intriguing. Then she gnawed on her lower lip, worrying it until I wanted to soothe it. I lifted my hand and drew it from between her teeth with my thumb. It was softer than I had imagined, and plump. A bit of moisture clung to it and I found myself running my thumb across her lip in a gentle stroke. When had Nessie's mouth become so inviting? I took in her face, as if seeing it for the first time.

Her skin, which I remembered as smooth but freckled, was now porcelain and perfect. It fair glowed in the light from the fire. Her cheeks which were often flushed with childish excitement were now luminous and inviting. Her eyes were dark and bottomless, and in them I saw not only beauty, but intelligence and something more.

"What will your family say to your marrying a common whore?" she asked concern in her face.

"You are not now, nor have you ever been a whore. You were raised in an unconventional setting, I agree, but that is through no fault of your own. We will simply have to reinvent your past so as to ensure your acceptance by father, after we are wed there is not a soul alive who would disrespect you. And as for being common…" I lifted her chin with my finger and ensured I had her entire attention. "You, Renesmee, are the most uncommon person I have ever known."

Her brow creased as her eyes read my expression. "Are you certain my being out of the ordinary is in my favour?"

I beamed at her. She had no idea how utterly charming she was. "I am most certain. Now, what say you? Will you marry me?"

Her eyes darted across my face and her breath increased. I could tell she was ruminating on my offer. The thought that she could refuse me had not initially crossed my mind, but the longer she remained silent the more concerned I became. She had nowhere to go, no one to rely on. If she did not accept my proposal what would become of her? "Ness," I said taking her tiny hand in my own, "think of the life you could have with me. You would never want for anything. I would see to it that you had the best of everything. You would have a respectable life, a position in society, and never have to fear for your safety. I swear I would take care of you beautifully."

"Of that I have no doubt," she said smiling sweetly. "You have always seen to it that I was cared for. I remember all you have done for me. What I do not understand is what you would have me do for you."

In that moment the smile lit her eyes and I looked into the most exquisite face I had ever beheld. I was not certain exactly when my charming little friend had become such a desirable woman, but it was abundantly clear that she had. I did not think before I moved. Had I, I might have paused, and I wanted to taste her far too much for delay. She melted into me and our lips tasted and explored each other. My hands cupped her face as my mouth slid across hers. She sighed out a moan and I took advantage of the breach to slip my tongue into her sweet mouth. She was tentative at first, but in only a moment she met me stroke for stroke and I felt myself fully respond to her. I could have taken her then and there, but Embry cleared his throat, alerting us to his presence in the room.

Ness stiffened and leaned away from me. Her eyes were glassy and her lips slightly swollen from our kiss. Her cheeks were flushed and her breathing ragged. She was intoxicating, and were we alone I would be exploring that, but we were not. I cupped her face and smiled at her.

"I shall have Bertie draw you a bath," I said rising from her side and ringing the bell. I instructed Bertie to escort Ness to my room for a bath and watched her go.

"You do realize that she will never convince your father that she is gentry," Embry said matter-of-factly, "although I do see her appeal."

I nodded. "I think I will require reinforcements."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Alice," I announced.

Embry smiled broadly. "Brilliant!"

"I will write her a note; would you deliver it on your way home?"

"Of course, I am dying to see how you plan to pull this off."

I penned the missive and begged Alice to come on the morrow and assist me. She would come; she often said nothing was more enjoyable than playing Pygmalion. I would trust her to provide Ness with the proper costumes and manners to capture my father. I had no doubt that he would be as charmed by her as I was.

Shortly after Embry left Bertie re-entered the drawing room and cleared his throat. "Yes, Bertie?"

"The young lady's bath is drawn, and I have towels for her, but as she has no maid to assist her, I felt I should proceed with caution."

"Oh," I said realizing that he was not comfortable attending to a female whose place in my house was not established. "Quite right. I shall attend her myself. Would you bring us some supper in a bit? Knock first," I instructed.

"But of course, Sir."

I took the drying clothes and all but ran up the stairs. Then I paused at the door. I had never imagined myself taking Renesmee to bed. She was no more than a sweet child in my mind. Then I saw her today. She had grown into a lovely woman. It would be no hardship to bed so sweet a morsel. Still, she was untouched, and that meant that I owed her care and concern. I wanted her first experience to be enjoyable and inviting. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

What I saw stole my breath. There she was, naked as the day she was born, seated on the rim of the bath, her hand testing the water's temperature. Her hair was cascading down her back all the way to her waist. It hung in curtains of flame curls, and the light of the fire kissed it in ways that made it seem luminous. The curve of her shoulder peaked through and led my eye to the swell of her breast. Her waist nipped in and her legs were long and shapely. My manhood strained against the fall of my trousers. I swallowed because I was actually close to drooling. I had never seen a woman so perfectly formed.

I stood stock still and watched as she descended into the water and listened to her sigh. I then found myself pulled across the room, needing to be closer. She heard me coming and turned to look at me over her shoulder. "Oh, Jacob, I am so sorry. I tried to wait, I swear, but I have never had a warm bath. Being the youngest and smallest I always got to the water after it was cooled and murky. Your manservant told me to go ahead. I should have waited," she said in a rush, attempting to stand.

"The bath was drawn for you, Sweet. Enjoy it. In fact, should it cool I will fetch you fresh water to reheat it." I said laying the soft drying cloths on a nearby bench.

"It is such a luxury," she demurred regaining her seat.

I grabbed a vial of scented oil and poured a bit into the water. The aroma of lavender and vanilla filled the room. I was surprised, I had no idea I had such oils in my possession, I immediately smiled. Bertie was the cleverest of servants, he always saw to it I was prepared for any circumstance.

Ness hummed in enjoyment. "That smells so pretty."

"Aye and it will keep this skin," I said running my hand across her lithe arm, "soft and touchable."

"Such luxury, I feel as if I were a kitten fallen into the cream pot."

I laughed at her innocent assessment of the situation. Then I began to smooth the wash cloth across her skin. She did not attempt to stop me; in fact, she sank deeper into the water and seemed to enjoy the contact.

"Tomorrow I will engage a lady's maid for you, but tonight, I will have to suffice."

Her brow furrowed in confusion. "What need have I for a maid?"

"You will, as my future duchess, require a maid to dress you, and bathe you, and any number of things. Although…" I said sponging her back and shoulders and watching the water bead upon her creamy skin. "… There does seem to be advantages to fulfilling these duties myself."

I saw the sweet blush stain her cheeks, but still, she accepted my touch without a word. At length, I removed the cloth from my hand and began to caress her skin directly. It was silky and soft and I found myself lifting her tumble of curls to expose the nape of her neck. My lips luxuriated in the sweet taste as I placed open mouthed kisses there. Ness leaned to expose more to me and I took advantage. She muttered a sultry "Mm."

"Say you will marry me," I urged her.

She turned to face me over her shoulder. Her dark brown eyes bored into mine and it took everything within me not to push her for an answer. She looked so beautiful and so inviting. I held my breath as she searched my face. I did not know what she hoped to see there, but after what seemed like forever, she nodded, a small smile lifting her lips.

"Is that a yes?" I asked for confirmation, needing to be completely certain.

She bit her lower lip and nodded again.

"Say it," I ordered. "Say the words… Please?"

"Yes. Yes I will marry you."

That was all I needed to hear. I scooped her from the tub and carried her to the bed. She giggled and attempted to get away from me, saying "Jacob, I am dripping across your carpet!"

"Then stay still and allow me to place you on my bed," I advised her. "The counter plane will absorb the water while I dry you off."

She laughed again as I nuzzled her sweet neck and ran my tongue around the shell of her ear. As I eased her onto the bed I took her lobe into my mouth and sucked lightly. Her laughter turned to a sigh and her hands came to my shoulders. I slid my hands over her slick skin pulling her into my arms as I trailed kisses across her chin and up to her waiting mouth.

She gasped as I pulled her hips forward to cradle me as I moved over her. I was still fully clothed, but there was no mistaking the pikestaff in my trousers. I plundered her mouth, tasting tempting, treasuring. Never before had kissing been so intoxicating. She had barely touched me and yet I was on fire for her. I could feel her pulse beneath my fingers and it beat a hurried tattoo. I wanted her more than I had ever wanted a woman. She was breath taking. She was light and sound overwhelming all my senses and yet I yearned for more.

Still I tore myself away long enough to look into those provocative eyes. I saw promise, sweetness, and intellect. In those eyes could see my unborn children. A future stretched out before me and I wanted it so much. It took me back a moment. This was supposed to be about pleasure, about comfort. It was not meant to mean anything. But this was Nessie, the sweet child who had always trusted me, the youth I had nurtured and taught. When had she become this?

My hesitation seemed to inspire her. She stood without as much as a blush. Her tiny hands began to untie my cravat, the sound of the cloth swishing through the intricate knot. Then she began un-buttoning my studs, freeing me from the confines of my shirt. In an instant her hands smoothed it and my jacket from my shoulders and I was exposed to her from the waist up. She looked her fill. It was as if she had never seen a man's form before, which I knew to be untrue. She had lived all her life in a brothel for pity's sake. Yet as her eyes traveled the expanse of my chest it felt like a fondling touch. She licked her lips and moved in to kiss my neck as I had kissed hers. The mere glancing brush of those lips set my nerves aflame. When she utilized her tongue I almost came up off the bed. My breathing was laboured and gasping. Her fingers began to wend their way across my skin and I thought she would un-man me.

As much as I enjoyed her innocent exploration I knew I needed to regain some measure of control. I rolled her over and stood, using shaking hands to release my fall and shimmy from the confines of my breeches. I pulled off my shoes and shed my smalls in a moment. My eyes roamed over her perfect form. She was small and lithe, but she had womanly curves that would inspire DaVinci. Her breasts were full, but high and perfectly formed. The dusky nipples poked out proudly, practically begging for attention, and who was I to deny them. I kissed the turgid peak. Nessie gasped audibly as I took her into my mouth suckled her. She arched into me, her legs sliding against my own. I lifted my head and again looked into the depth of those fathomless eyes. "Ness," I sighed, "I need you."

"Then take me, Jacob, I am yours."

The warmth her words engendered within my chest was marked. Still, it was only lust. It had been too long since I had slaked my need for the release only a woman could provide. Still, this was Ness's first time, and I wanted her to enjoy herself. I took the head of my staff and slipped it between her dewy folds. I was amazed at the moisture I found there. She was nigh on weeping for my possession. I moaned with joy as I slid forward into her welcoming sheath. Although instinct urged me to plunge in and take her roughly, I knew that was unwise. Instead I sank in inch by inch in the most tortuous ecstasy I had ever known. I allowed her to adjust to the feel of being filled; I guided her into womanhood with gentle urging until I hit her maidenhead. "Ness, this will hurt a bit, try to breathe through it and I swear it will be worth the effort."

She nodded slowly the dark orbs of her eyes wide with apprehension. I pulled back just a bit and then breached her with a final quick thrust. She hissed in a breath and stiffened beneath me. "It's alright, Sweeting, just breathe."

I began to kiss her again, gentling my invasion with gentle licks and pressed lips. I partook of her honeyed essence until I felt her move beneath me in response. With the invitation of her arcing hips I began to entice her and move within her. Each stroke seemed to stoke the flame within her. She arched into me her hands sweetly clawing at the muscles of my back. We were climbing to the peak together and I urged her closer and closer. Her eyes flew open and her breathing began to hitch, yet I could feel her holding back.

"You feel that, Ness, the quickening in your blood? The tremulous feel of balancing on a precipice?"

"I… Oh God…"

"Let it happen, Ness. Let go!"

"I cannot…" she said breathily. "I will fall."

"I will catch you," I urged as I began to move in earnest. I knew she could not resist the building explosion, but I wanted her to revel in it, not fear it. Her breathing was so laboured that it mimicked our joining. I drove again and again until I felt the tremor of her release. "Let go!" I cried just as she did and in an instant I followed spilling my seed deep within her warmth. We continued to kiss and caress until all remnants of our release were quieted. It was then that I heard the soft knock of my valet at the door.

Damn, why had I ordered food when all I wanted was to consume this morsel again?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

JPOV

The knock had made Nessie stiffen beneath me. I soothed her brow and kissed her sweet lips before whispering "Do not move a muscle." Then I slipped from the warm confines of her body and threw on my dressing gown.

I knew it was Bertie, and did not wish to expose Ness to him, for both their sakes. I opened the door a crack to see his always dour face. "I brought your meals, Sir."

I could smell meat and vegetables, but I also saw a plate of fruit, cheese and bread. "Just the fruit plate, please. Oh, and the wine."

"As you wish, Sir. Will there be anything else?"

"No thank you, Bertie. You may retire for the evening."

I took the plate, two glasses and bottle from him and then closed the door before he could acknowledge the dismissal. I turned to the vision gracing my bed. True to her word she had not moved. She was laying with her hands above her head stretched out on top of the coverlet in all her naked glory. I placed the plate and things on the bedside table and took a seat beside my beauty.

"Hungry?" I asked.

She shook her head. Her eyes locked with mine, not daring to look anywhere else. I slid the dressing gown off and lay beside her. Suddenly we were face to face with nothing between us. I could not remember ever really talking with any of the women I had bedded. I didn't really know them, I never really wanted to. Yet here I was, looking into eyes I had known for years. Eyes I had always found to hold thoughts, ideas, stories, and humour.

When she was a child she was always so eager to learn that I felt the urge to encourage her. I visited the brothel a couple times a week back then. I was young and randy. Each evening I would choose a dove, tupp her thoroughly and then go in search of my little friend.

I never gave it much thought, but I never spent time with the doves post coupling, I was far too interested in finding Ness and talking with her.

My hand brushed her arm softly and I watched a flush creep over her chest and up her face. "Do you know how beautiful you are?"

"No," she said honestly.

It was all I could do not to laugh. She was ever reacting this way. I would ask her questions and she answered the first thing that came to mind. I had always enjoyed it. "Well, you are. I keep looking for my little friend, all knees, elbows, and freckles."

Her hands flew to cover her nose and cheeks. I peeled them away and looked into her heart shaped face. Where she had once had a cherubic appearance she had grown into her features. She had high cheekbones that held very few freckles, a straight nose that tipped just at the right moment. Her lips were full and plump, slightly swollen from our previous passion. I could see the child on the edges, but she was now all woman.

"Tell me about what you have been doing while I was away," I urged.

She lowered her eyes and bit her lip. "After you left… Mrs. Cope told me it was time for me to join the ranks of the doves. I was terrified. So I… I…"

I tipped her chin up with a finger. "What Ness, what did you do?"

"I lied," she said licking her lips and avoiding my gaze. "I told her you had expressed interest in me, but only if I remained pure in your absence. I told her you had spoken of paying a king's ransom for the privilege."

"Clever."

"I thought to appeal to her avarice."

"Then what happened? I mean, she was about to…"

She shivered and attempted to turn away from me, but I knew this move. She used it when she didn't want to tell me something she thought might upset me. She had done it when Mrs. Cope had thrown away a book I had given her. I did now, what I did then. I scooped her into my arms and began to rock gently back and forth. As usual, I heard her sniff back a sob as I did. "It's alright Little Bird, you can tell me anything." The words tumbled from my mouth as they always had. I meant them now, just as I had meant them then.

"You came back, and you didn't come for me. She said it was clear that you had lost your interest." She pulled back from my embrace and looked me in the eye. "Why did you return tonight?"

"I heard at my club about the auction. I wasn't interested until someone told me the virgin was you. I…" Why had I gone? I had no inkling of taking Ness to wife. In my mind she was still my Little Bird, a child. What had possessed me? "I figured I could solve both our problems rather painlessly." A lie. I had no thought other than saving my dear girl from the life that had always lain ahead of her. I must have known at some level what awaited her if she remained in that house.

"Now, come and eat a little before I devour you again."

I avoided the tender moment and fed her. It was foreplay, but it did not distract me from the thoughts that were saturating my mind. Why had I proposed? Well, for one thing I was not about to leave Ness in that house for another moment. I would burn it to the ground before I saw her turned out as a whore, but I could have arranged for a position as a maid or a governess for her. Instead I had chosen to link her forever to myself.

True, she was stunningly beautiful, a fact I was unaware of until I saw her. She was also sweet, and funny, and innocent.

I felt a comfort in her presence. Ness and I had been able to talk about anything. I recalled the arguments we had had over interpretations of books, or the beauty and meaning of poems.

She had confided secrets over the years; told me when she had lied, where her secret hiding places were, and when she had her first crush, although she drew the line at giving me the name of her childhood paramour. I remember trying to uncover his identity for months.

We talked as we ate. Not about anything earth shattering, but the conversation was pleasant and easy. I could not remember ever talking with another lover, not even the three Mistresses I had kept. I rolled off and went home after every encounter. I wanted none of the softness and emotion. I would not be like my father. Love was a cancer that ate away at a man leaving him with nothing.

When my mother had died I was fourteen. My father stopped being who he was. He was wrecked for months, ignoring the estate and his duties to society and the crown. He walked about the house like a man lost. He barely remembered I was alive. I went off to school and he never came to see me. I returned and he wasn't there. Well, he was physically there, but he was so consumed with sadness and loss that he seemed unaware of my presence. So I grew into manhood without a guide. I learned of the world through trial and error.

True, he had pulled himself together reasonably well by the time I was old enough to move into my own rooms. He had attempted to recapture my youth by instructing me on what he expected of me, but by then I did not think I required his advice, nor did I trust him to remain stable.

We had become polite strangers, and it saddened us both. Still we could not find our way back to each other. When I had purchased my commission he had been furious. He told me he would disinherit me if I went. I told him if I perished in the field it would save him the trouble.

They were the last words spoken between us until I had returned six months ago. I expected to pick up the battle where we had left it. Instead I had returned to a man frail and broken. He had suffered a seizure. He was unable to walk, and he believed he was not long for this world.

I had spent my time back in the country trying to keep the estate intact, and trying to argue my father into fighting for life. I had not anticipated that his fight would turn to insisting I find a bride, but perhaps having found one, he would fight to see his first grandchild.

"Jacob?" Nessie's sweet voice broke into my reverie.

I did not wish to think about my father any longer. I needed to lose myself in something other than worry. I removed the plate from between us and turned back to the enchanting figure before me. I crooked my finger toward her urging her forward. She obeyed instantly. "How are you feeling, Sweeting?"

"Heavenly," she replied.

"Are you experiencing any soreness?"

"None."

"We must be careful if we are to do this, but I must admit, I want you again. Feel free to refuse me should you need a rest," I told her, praying that she felt the desire I did.

"What I need is for you to take me again," she said sliding into my arms.

"I am so glad you said that."

In that instant I drew her into a passionate kiss. She was so very sweet as our breaths mingled. I caressed her satin skin and felt her tiny hands begin to become bolder. She traced the lines and planes of my chest and stomach. Everywhere she touched became super sensitized. She fanned the flames of passion within me until I could wait no longer. Knowing that she would likely suffer some discomfort on the morrow I wanted to protect her from as much as I could so I maneuvered her to straddle my lap.

Her core was slick against my shaft and I again wondered at her responsiveness. Feeling me there she began to move herself against me. I nigh on growled as she coated me in her sweet juices.

"Ness, take me at your own pace," I instructed. She stopped moving for a moment and I saw hesitation in her face, but I needed to be buried within her so I captured her mouth again. This time I began to thrust my tongue against hers to encourage her. It worked. As the kiss intensified she raised her hips and I slipped into her welcoming sheath. I broke the kiss to suck air in through my teeth. She was so hot, and so tight that I was in heaven. She rose above me and bent her head forward until our brows touched. She was new to this, but her natural sensuality made it hot and sweet. I wanted to allow her full control, to protect her from having any residual pain, but with each draw of her hips back I became more and more inflamed.

My intentions were pure, but my needs were overpowering. I slid down until I had some traction and began to raise my own hips at an increased pace. With us moving together the depth increased and so did our passion. I felt flutterings with her and wanted to increase her satisfaction I began to suckle her breast, running my tongue across her nipples made her sigh and then arch back bringing me even deeper into her molten core. We danced this dance until we both tumbled off the cliff into euphoria.

I draped her over my chest and ran my fingers through her hair. "Rest my sweet. Tomorrow we will talk," I promised, "tonight, sleep."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

NPOV

I slipped into sleep easily, but woke when I heard a soft sigh that did not emanate from me. I felt a wall of muscle beneath my cheek, along with an iron arm about my shoulders. For a moment I was certain it was a dream. I lifted my eyes and saw his sleeping visage, so at peace, so handsome.

I had loved him from the first. I remember hanging upside-down from that blasted tree and seeing the face of an angel come to rescue me. I recall how he took me under his wing and saw to it that I received an education. Mrs. Cope had not been pleased at the idea of having a tutor coming for me so Jacob had arranged for Monsieur Alistair to come twice weekly and give me music lessons.

Mrs. Cope could not find a reason to deny me music lessons when my singing entertained patrons while they waited for the girls and kept them on the premises. She insisted that I learn bawdy songs that would make the men randy and keep the alcohol flowing, but Monsieur Alistair said I needed to learn classic and airs as well to know how to sing without hurting my voice.

He also taught me to read, as he said I could not learn new songs without the ability. I adored him, and he adored me. I learned everything he would teach me, even if I was not allowed to practice much of it in my everyday life.

It was Monsieur Alistair that encouraged Jacob to steal me away for adventures. I was about ten when Jacob came to the house during the day. I overheard him speaking with Mrs. Cope from the sitting room.

"I am willing to pay you for the time I take her away from her chores," he had said.

"She is too young for sport, m'lord. You know full well it would be indecent."

"I wish to take her to a museum, Madam, not to… How could you even think such a thing? If you believe me so base, perhaps I should find another establishment to utilize."

"No, no, m'lord. I just wanted to be certain of your intent. The girl is under my protection, and when she is of age for purchase, I mean to get a pretty penny."

"Here, this should suffice for the hours I mean to spend. Thank you."

He had come out of the office and seen me peering round the door frame. "Come on Nessie," he had said. "I am taking you on an adventure."

We had ridden in a hack coach, my very first. It took us through the streets of London. I had never ventured out of my little corner of the world. The sights and smells were wondrous. The hack came to rest outside a huge building with marble columns. Jacob lifted me from the interior and leant down to my level.

"Today you may look at anything you like. All you need to do is tell me where you want to go. There are wonders to be seen, my little bird. Come."

We walked through the doors and he let me explore to my heart's content. I saw ancient manuscripts, Egyptian artifacts, and incredible paintings. I was thrilled to be in the presence of such beauty and history. Then I saw the hall of sculpture.

There were representations of the human form everywhere. Women draped in gauzy gowns with flowers woven through their hair. There were busts, with patrician noses and glaring eyes, and then I saw it. A tall muscled hero, sculpted in white marble, his muscles bunching as he carried a beauty in his arms. He was barely covered by a small draping cloth. He looked at the woman in his arms with a fierceness that stunned me. I stared open mouthed, in awe.

"What is it, Ness?"

"Who are they?" I asked in innocence.

"That is Perseus. The woman in his arms is Andromeda. He rescued her from a fate worse than death, and he won her hand in marriage," Jacob explained.

"He is so beautiful," I whispered reverently.

Jacob chuckled. "Men are not beautiful, sweetheart. Men are handsome and virile."

I looked up into his face and shook my head. "You are beautiful," I said.

He beamed at me. "Well, thank you, but again I would prefer handsome."

He let me sit and just stare occasionally he would regale the tale of the statue that had captured my fancy. He wove faerytales that spoke of heroes and heroines, knights upon white steeds battling to save their lady loves.

"They loved beyond reason, they loved beyond cares, and they lived happily ever after," he said as he concluded one such tale.

"I want to be loved beyond reason," I sighed.

"And so you shall be little bird. Someday a fine prince will charge up on a white steed and steal you away from the dungeon."

I was a fool to believe him, but believe him I did. I read and worked under Monsieur Alistair's tutelage and became rather accomplished, even though I was forced to hide it from Mrs. Cope.

When I was thirteen I knew the only hero I wanted was Jacob. He was everything I dreamed of, handsome, kind, gentle, and generous. He had stopped frequenting the girls above stairs nearly as often as he had in his youth. I hoped it meant he was waiting for me, but in truth, he was simply becoming more refined in his tastes.

I was fourteen the first time I learned he had taken a Mistress. He only visited a few times that year. He brought me some books, and we talked in the arboretum.

"My how you have grown, little bird. How tall you have gotten." He chucked me under my chin, as he had done when I was a child.

"You too have changed," I said with a surly tone. "You no longer have time for your old friends. I read in the scandal sheets that you are out every evening at this ball, or that rout. You are considered one of the most eligible bachelors of the ton. It must be exhausting."

"It can be," he admitted. "Actually, I am keeping busy. What about you, Little Bird? How are you occupying your time these days?"

"The Missus has me singing in the main lounge. That occupies my evenings. The doves sleep most of the day, so I am free to read. I assist cook sometimes, I even go to market for her occasionally."

"What are you reading these days?"

"I re-read the books you gave me, and occasionally," I said conspiratorially, "the bookseller allows me to borrow a book."

He looked at me with a look I did not know, and I thought I knew all his expressions. "I will see to it that you have an account there. You may buy the books you wish."

"Really?!" I said flinging my arms around his neck. "Thank you."

"Anything for you, Ness."

I saw him twice more that year. He would come and talk for hours and then disappear for months again. I missed him so I often allowed the doves to speak to me about him, just to hear his name. It killed me when they lamented his defection to greener pastures. They all said that he was an attentive and gentle lover, but none of them knew him. He never spent time with them, never shared conversation.

I remember Lauren saying that he was far too focused on the act itself to allow for seduction and afterglow. She said it was a blessing because it meant that she could have more commerce after him.

Jessica did not feel the same. He had turned to her after a time with Lauren. She said he was the handsomest man she had ever bedded, and that she had hoped he would come to like her. She said that to be protected by a man such as he would be heavenly.

I never shared that it was I who received conversation from him. I never confided that it was I who heard his thoughts and fears. I knew that he battled with his father. I knew he missed his sainted mother. What I did not know was why he separated the act of love from the emotion.

My sixteenth year brought the last visit with him. He came to see me and begged me to spare him an hour or two. It had been nine months since I had last seen him, and he looked rough. He had stubble upon his cheek and dark circles beneath his eyes. He pulled me into the arboretum and shut the door.

"What ails you? Are you ill?" I asked.

"Not ill, just tired. I wanted to see you. I have missed you, Little Bird."

"And I, you."

He sat down on a bench and shook his head from side to side. "I cannot imagine why. I am not fit for company."

"That is untrue," I chided. "Whatever gave you that impression?"

"I have been losing friends of late. They have joined the army and are off fighting, or they are bound to ignore the war all together. I can neither ignore the battles, nor am I any use to those who would fight. And now I face a crossroad with no sense of what direction I should go." He looked so unlike himself. His hair was longer, his cheek paler, and his dress haphazard and unkempt. I longed to assist him, but I knew not how.

"What can I do?" I begged.

"Talk to me sweet. Tell me that I have made a difference in your young life. Let me look at you."

I stood before him in my plain dress. He took my hand and spun me before him. He looked me up and down and his face fell again. "Even you have altered, Little Bird. You will soon be grown. You are such a pretty child. I wonder if have done right by you." Then he laughed a mirthless laugh. "Papa would probably find fault with my befriending you as well. There is not a choice I have made that has caused him pride. What is the point?"

I sank to my knees before him. "What matter is his approval? If you have lived your life to the best of your ability and have left goodness wherever you have passed who cares for his good opinion. Leave judgment to God, it is His purview."

"Have I left goodness? Have I done any good in my life?"

"How can you look at me and ask that? You have helped me in ways no one else even thought to. You have made all the difference in my life. Without you I would have known no tenderness or care."

He looked at me confusion marring his beautiful features. "Is that true?"

"It is. You are my hero. You always have been."

"You see me as a hero? Oh, you sweet child." He lifted me from before him and held me tightly against his chest. "Thank you, Ness. Thank you. You have helped me make a decision. Bless you, my sweet, sweet friend."

He hugged me again and then departed his face less drawn, his step easier. I received a package from him a week later. It contained a book of poetry with a note telling me of his departure to the front. It was the last I had heard from him for two years. I was certain that I had lost him forever, yet here I was, wrapped in his arms.

I did not know what I might have done in life to deserve such a gift, but I thanked God for taking note of it.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I am thrilled at the response this story is getting. So thank you all, for lending me you attention. Only one more chapter until we meet Jasper and Alice. I am excited, I hope you are as well.

Chapter 6

JPOV

I slept more deeply than I had in years and woke refreshed and at ease. I stretched my arms above my head and upon lowering them I felt a soft warmth at my side. My eyes flew open and I sat up startled. Their curled at my side was a naked beauty. Her lashes fanned out upon her cheeks and her copper hair curled around my fingers. She was real, last evening had occurred. I could not remember ever waking to a woman beside me. I had been meticulous about not remaining with the women I bedded. I thought it would be uncomfortable and awkward, but having Ness beside me seemed… right.

I had never bedded a virgin before. I was certain it would be an experience that would be lacking in passion, how wrong I was. In fact I could not recall a more passionate, nor satisfying encounter.

I gazed a while at the amazing creature at my side. She was exquisite, her skin creamy and smooth, her hair a lurid tangle of curls that blanketed my chest and arm, her mouth, slightly over generous and imminently kissable.

Just the thought of kissing her wakened my arousal. I wanted her again, but she would be feeling the effects of last night's sport this morning and only a cad would impose his needs upon a woman so new to the act. I slid myself from her embrace and donned my dressing gown. I decided to get her something to break her fast.

Bertie was up, per usual, but he was standing guard in the hallway awaiting orders, which was not at all usual. "Good day, my lord," he greeted me.

"Good morning, Bertie. Could you arrange for breakfast for two please?"

"Yes, sir. Anything specific?"

I thought for a moment. Truth be told I had no idea what would please Ness as far as a meal went. I decided to go overboard. "Get croissants, buns, and toast, eggs, and kippers, rashers of bacon, and fried tomatoes, tea, coffee, and cocoa. Surely she can find something in all that to satisfy her, and I will dress myself today."

"As you wish, Sir."

I nodded and returned to my bedroom. I opened the door slowly, so as not to disturb her, but when I looked to the bed she was already sitting up with the sheet covering her alluring form. She was slightly rumpled, but she took my breath away.

"Hello," she said shyly.

"Hello to you too," I said with a genuine smile. I came to sit on the bed beside her. "How are you this morning?"

She blushed prettily and looked away from me. "I feel fine, thank you"

I lifted her chin so she would look at me again. "I am very glad to hear that. I have ordered us some breakfast. I think we should dress. You are far too distracting in my bed and we have some things we must discuss. Do you require some privacy?"

"No, thank you, I am fine," she said dropping the sheet and sliding from the bed. She walked to the fireplace where she had dropped the dress she had worn, pulled it over her head and began to button it. It was a servant's dress and too big. In that instant I realized that the dress was all she wore. She had neither a chemise nor drawers. She was barefooted in her ankle boots. I knew that I needed Alice more than ever.

I donned my smalls and trousers, and ran a razor across my cheeks and chin. I slipped a shirt over my head and tucked it in. I took a neck cloth and attempted to tie it myself to no avail. After the third attempt Ness pulled it gently from my hands and smoothed it flat. Then she began winding it about my neck, folding and arranging it into a rather impressive knot. I knew Bertie could do better, but in truth it looked quite good. "Thank you, Ness. Wherever did you learn to do that?"

Again she blushed. It was quite charming. "It was part of my training. The doves said that most gentlemen require some assistance in dressing, and as Mrs. Cope kept no valets it fell to the girls. I am not as expert as I should be, but you have a valet, so I am certain you will not need me often."

I took her dainty hand in mine and pulled it in for a kiss to her palm. I could get used to mornings like this, the gentle conversation, the warmth that existed between us. I was enjoying her company just as I always had. It was easy being with her.

I slid on a waistcoat and began to do up the buttons. In an instant Nessie's diminutive hands took over the task. I donned my tail coat and boots and we were ready to face the day.

I grinned and led her from the room down the hall to my dining room. Bertie had set the table with everything I had asked for and I watched Nessie's face register genuine shock. I pulled out her chair and then took my seat.

She looked uncomfortable and I felt for her. "What would you like, sweet? I believe we have anything that you might want."

Ness opened her mouth and then closed it again. Three times she did this before any sound came. "Mornings meant stale bread and milk. This is a feast. I cannot begin to imagine where to start."

I laughed out loud. She was effervescent and enthralling. "Try it all and decide what you like. May I suggest you begin with the chocolate?" She nodded and Bertie moved forward to pour her a cup of the sweet steaming liquid.

She lifted the cup to her succulent lips and tasted the drink. Her eyes closed and she made a humming sound that sent shivers through me. It was much like the sounds she had made last night when she experienced her release. Then her pink tongue swept across her lower lip, savoring the flavour. I felt my trousers tighten. She was far too tempting for words.

"This is heavenly," she enthused.

"Then you shall have it every morning from now on," I promised.

"I do not require such luxuries, My Lord. I am certain that whatever you might have of a morning would more than suffice."

"It well may, but you see, I enjoy indulging you, Sweeting, I always have. Now, eat up, we have some calls to make."

I began opening the morning post. There was a note from Alice, just as I had hoped.

_My dear friend,_

_ Your missive has intrigued me greatly. I would be delighted to welcome you and your young lady today. I thought perhaps you could come at eleven, I will instruct the staff that I will not be in to other visitors from then on._

_ I hope that you will be more forthcoming upon your visit. All you said was that you have chosen a bride and require assistance to prepare her to meet your father._ _I am quite certain there is more to this. After all, what young lady of the ton would be unprepared to meet the Duke?_

_ I commit to assisting you, in exchange for the entire story. I am certain it will be a lark. I anxiously await you both._

_Yours,_

_Lady Alice Whitlock_

"We have been invited to see one of my favorite ladies, Ness. We will stop in Covent Garden and pick up some flowers, and then we will go to Grosvenor Square. There is time, however, so I expect you to eat heartily."

She smiled and took a spoon of eggs and a croissant. Her manners were exquisite. Being raised in the most exclusive house in London she was taught table manners and how to address the gentry. She was fit to be a mistress that could swim the waters of the ton's periphery. I wondered what else she might have learned, but I was a bit reluctant to delve into it all at once.

We ate in companionable silence and then I donned my great coat and wrapped her in the shawl she had worn the previous evening. I had ordered the Barouche Box and four to convey us about the city today. I chose it for several reasons, not the least of which was that I wanted to shield Ness from prying eyes and gossip mongers.

I tucked her small hand into the crook of my arm and assisted her into the carriage. I then climbed the step and slid in across from her. I waited until Bertie shut the door and we began to move before begining my confession.

"Renesmee, how much do you know about my father? I mean I know I have spoken to you of our estrangement, but… He is actually the reason that I have not been in town since I returned. He has been ill, Ness, seriously so."

"Oh, Jacob, I am so very sorry."

"Thank you, but I want you to understand where he and I stand, because I will have to present you to him before we actually wed," I explained.

I watched her blanch at my statement. "Present me?"

"We will have to come up with plausible story. I cannot have your true background known by him."

"You want me to lie?" she said horrified.

"I wish it was unnecessary, but there is no way to appease my father without reinventing you a bit. Not to worry, I have enlisted an amazing friend to assist us. Alice is brilliant and knows a thing or two about reinvention."

She still looked pale and she was worrying her hands in her lap. I leaned across the box of the carriage and took those hands in my own. She raised her eyes to mine and I saw the uncertainty there.

"Ness, I will take you to wife no matter where you were raised, but I do not wish to upset my father. He has declared that I must wed. I am hoping that once that task is completed we can provide him a reason to fight to remain with us. No matter what I think of him, I am not ready for him to depart this world." As I said the words I realized how very much I meant them. I was far from resolving my relationship with my sire, but he was still the only family I had left.

"Of course not, I promise to do whatever I can to assist you. Even if that means… what did you call it? Reinvention?"

"Exactly. Now, we have a stop to make before we go to Lady Alice's. We need to go to Covent Garden."

Once we entered the hubbub of Covent Garden I had the driver pull off the road and I told Ness to remain in the carriage. I never went to see Alice without some sort of offering. She had ever been generous with her time and advice, so I generally arrived with a small gift. Today it would be violets. Most ladies of the ton would be horrified at such a bouquet, but Alice was not most ladies. I bought six bunches of the deep purple blooms and then looked around for something else. My eyes lit upon the soft petals of a peach rose. I reached for it and was reminded of the softness and texture of Nessie's skin. In a moment of weakness I bought her a single bloom and then went to make my way back to her.

I passed the small table of a bookseller. I paused a moment too long and found myself purchasing a small book for the lovely girl in the carriage. I knew that was something she would enjoy, and I wanted her at ease. Especially since I was not at all certain of how much deception was going to be required of her.

I popped back into the carriage and found Ness again looking unsettled. "Close your eyes, Little Bird," I ordered her.

She obeyed me without question and in seeing her there, so trusting and so lovely I pulled her close and kissed her lips. I had meant it to be short and sweet, but one taste was not nearly enough. I deepened the kiss and drank in her sweetness.

I forced myself to pull back from the kiss knowing that we hadn't the time to pursue this as I would like. She still had her eyes closed so I took her hand and turned it up placing the small volume with the rose into it.

"For you my sweet," I said. She opened her eyes and looked down. A beaming smile flooded her face and she flung her arms about my neck.

"Oh, Jacob, thank you." She had not even looked at the book yet, she was simply excited at the prospect of a new tome.

"It is a pocket version of Shakespeare's sonnets. I remember how much you enjoyed his comedies. I thought these might cheer you."

She went back to her seat and opened the book reverently. That was when she noticed the rose. "How beautiful," she said lifting it to her delicate nose and drinking in its aroma. I watched her enthralled by her beauty and her innocence.

"You certainly are," I breathed. I was not certain she heard me until the blush crept up her cheeks.

"Thank you," she said softly.

We rode to Grosvenor Square and I hopped out to lift Nessie to the ground. Then I bounded up the walk to the large oak door, after I knocked it opened to reveal the Whitlock's butler, Smithers. He was a dour faced man who guarded their abode as if he were a dragon protecting his lair.

"Lord Black, you are expected," he said stepping aside to allow my entrance. Nessie lingered a bit behind me and he blocked her path. "Inquiries for employment are taken at the rear, Miss, although if you are unaware of that I am not certain you are fit for employment."

I turned to see her eyes round in shock and alarm. I reached round Smithers and took her hand. "She is with me, Smithers, and Lady Alice expects us both."

The butler had the good grace to look abashed, and stepped aside to allow Nessie's entrance. Then he closed the door and snapped his fingers. Two footmen came forward and took my hat and coat and Nessie's wrap. "I shall announce you, m'lord."

Nessie looked around at the dark and polished wood of the foyer. In a moment Smithers returned and clicked his heals. "Lady Whitlock begs you to enter, Lord Black, but requests that you do so alone. She says that I am to see to the young lady's comfort, but that she requires a private word."

I turned to Ness and she nodded almost imperceptibly. There was a chair in the hallway and I led her to it and eased her to her seat. "I will not be long, Sweet. If you need anything, send for me."

She smiled wanly and nodded again. I entered the drawing room on the second floor and Alice opened her arms in welcome.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Jacob's friends are protective, not vindictive. Bear that in mind. And Please enjoy. BTW two banners are available for viewing.

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And

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Chapter 7

NPOV

The hallway was quiet as a church. The butler stood ramrod straight at his post outside the door and did not even look at me. Then again, why would he? He had deemed me beneath him based on my attire, and when Jacob had said I was with him he had sneered as if he knew exactly what that meant. He assumed I was a strumpet whom his lordship had picked off the street. It was not the first time I had been judged by my appearance, and it was unlikely the last.

I decided to amuse myself with the book that Jacob had given me. I had devoured Mr. Shakespeare's comedies when Alistair had offered them to me. The language was so beautiful, and the tales so amusing. I had read some of the tragedies, but they were so terribly sad that I could not bear to continue.

I opened the pocket volume and paged through the poems. They were beautiful. The depth of emotion and the descriptions of things pulled at my heart. I had read two sonnets when I heard a door down the hall open and a tall, handsomely dressed gentleman made his way toward the butler and me. He stopped and exchanged a look with the servant to which the butler nodded.

"Good morning, Miss…?" he said sketching a bow to me.

I was not certain how to respond. I had a name, but had never heard tell of a sir name. "I am called Renesmee, sir." I offered.

"I am Lord Whitlock, although I prefer my military title, you may call me Major. Would you come with me for a moment?" he asked offering me his hand to rise.

I was uncertain of what to do. Here I was in the presence of the lord of the manor, yet I was waiting for Jacob. "I am waiting for a visitor to your lady, Major. I believe that he expects me to remain here."

"Smithers will inform Lord Black of your location should he require you. Allow me to be a hospitable man, if you please." His face was friendly and open and his blue eyes were gentle so I took his hand and followed him into a nearby room.

It appeared to be a study. The furniture was large and masculine. A substantial secretary stood at the wall and an inviting fire burned in the grate. Major Whitlock led me to a wing-backed chair and I took the seat. He stoked the fire and then leant upon the mantle looking at me with curiosity.

He shook his head and looked down. "I had so hoped the rumor was false."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I was at the club last evening. I ran into Lord Embry Call. He told me a tale that I had hoped was in error, but I see it was the sad truth."

I had no idea what he meant so I waited for him to explain. "Embry told me that our mutual friend, Lord Black had spirited away with the sweet virgin that Mrs. Cope was planning to auction last evening. I take it you are she?"

I swallowed hard. "I am," I confessed.

"I see. Miss Renesmee, how familiar are you with my friend, Lord Black?" he asked gently.

"I have known him for many years, m'lord."

"Then you know of the difficulties he has had with his father?"

"I… I am aware that there is an estrangement… of sorts," I said knowing that I did not in point of fact understand their relationship well.

Major Whitlock sighed and took a seat near me. "Miss Renesmee," he began earnestly, "Jacob's father has ordered him to wed within the month or lose his title and his fortune to his cousin. He received this news just yesterday. I think that his actions were a direct result of this ultimatum. He did not think this through. When his father discovers who you are…" he cleared his throat attempting to soften the blow, "well, let us say that the outcome is almost certain. Jacob will be disinherited and destitute."

I could feel the panic rise in my chest. I could be responsible for Jacob losing his means and title. I could be the cause of permanent estrangement between father and son. I gasped.

"Now, I do not believe that you were aware of these circumstances, nor do I believe you would wish to be the cause of such a hardship for Lord Black, would you?"

"Never," I said adamantly.

"I am willing to compensate you for your time and trouble. I can offer you a thousand pounds to help you find safe lodging and help keep body and soul together until you find more suitable employment," he said rising and going over to the secretary.

I stopped listening to him after he asked me if I wanted for Jacob to lose his title and inheritance. As he crossed the room I stood and made my way to the door the blood rushing in my ears. I needed to get out before Jacob returned to look for me. I attempted to open the door but the Major was there in an instant.

"What are you doing?"

"I need to leave, sir. I will not be responsible for harming Lord Black in any way. Please direct me to the servants stairs and I will depart the back way. Please… I beg you."

"Will you not wait for the bank draft of funds?"

"What need have I of funds? What I need is escape. Please, m'lord, I must away before Lord Black can prevent my going. He never thinks of himself, so I must do it for him." I was desperate to escape before I could do any irreparable harm to him.

"You would protect him in all this?"

"Yes, sir."

"Why?"

"He has always protected me. I owe him nothing less." Again I pulled at the door and again the gentleman blocked my way.

"Is it possible you care for him?" he asked searching my face with those bluer than blue eyes.

"I beg you, sir, let me pass," I pleaded.

"You do care for him," he declared.

"I love him," I said dissolving in tears and sinking to the floor. "I love him."

The major sank to his knees before me and held my shoulders softly. "How is this possible?"

"He is the first living soul to treat me with kindness and concern. I was less than a servant in Mrs. Cope's employ, for I did nothing to earn my keep, but he saw me. He treated me as if I mattered. He saw to it I was not abused or too harassed. He made time for me. He was my entire world. I will not allow him to throw away his future simply because he decided to once again treat me with kindness," I said through watery tears. "Please help me, sir."

He rose and assisted me in standing. He pulled out his handkerchief and handed it to me. "I will indeed assist you. I promise. Come." He led me to the hallway and then to the door through which Jacob had been admitted. I hesitated, but before I could protest the butler had opened the door and the major had pulled me into a lavishly appointed sitting room.

There was Jacob sitting next to a beautiful lady dressed in pale green muslin and lace. Her hair was jet black and her eyes a startling blue. She had a welcoming smile and stood to welcome us. "There they are," she said stepping forward and taking my hands in her own.

I looked to Jacob and he stepped forward, concern upon his face. "What goes on? Jasper?"

"Not to worry my friend, I was simply assuring myself and my wife that she deserved you."

"Damn you man! You have made her cry." Jacob came forward and took my hands from the lady's. He raised them to his lips and kissed them pulling me into his arms. I was still gasping for air and his affectionate embrace began the crying all over again. How would I leave him after this? It would surely break my heart. Still I had to go.

I mustered every ounce of strength within me to push Jacob away. He would not allow me free though, he grasped my hands again. "What's wrong Little Bird?"

"I must go," I said through hiccup breaths. "I cannot marry you. Please let me go."

Jacob enfolded me back to his arms and turned on his friend. "What have you done, you idiot?!"

"Oh child," came the major's gentle voice, "all is well. I beg your forgiveness. Jacob is quite dear to my wife and me. I needed to assure myself that your motives for marrying him were pure."

I felt myself led to a small settee and eased down to sit upon it. I was still safe in the arms of the man I loved, but I was confused by the activity around me. "Jacob, let her go," said the lady. "You two leave us; allow cooler heads to ease the young lady's distress."

"Alice…" Jacob said in a warning tone.

"Now," she said sharply, "go!"

He tipped my face to his and looked directly into my eyes. "I will not be far, Sweet. Listen to Alice she is one of the wisest women I know. Promise me you will not run."

I searched his eyes and saw the pleading in them. I sucked in a deep breath to calm my racing heart and nodded my assent. Then he grinned and leaned forward to kiss my forehead. "I'll hold you to it."

"I know," I managed.

Jacob stood and bowed to the lady. Then he and the major departed the door I had just come through. The lady took a seat next to me and sat still watching me, a slight smile upon her face. After a few moments I had myself back under control. I wiped my cheeks with the handkerchief that I still clutched in my fist.

"There's a girl. Sometimes men can be so tiresome, all bombast and thunder. I apologize on my husband's behalf. I asked him to ensure that you were a woman worthy of my friend, and I fear he has frightened you."

"He said that marrying me will cost Lord Black his title and fortune. I will not allow that. I will give him up. Surely you will assist me in this?" I asked calmly.

The lady sighed and rolled her eyes. "Forgive him, my dear. We will not allow Jacob to be disinherited, and having seen his care of you I am afraid you will have to marry him. He would skin Jasper alive should you fly from his arms."

She smiled again and looked me over. She was a lovely woman, slight and spritely. She was significantly smaller than her husband, yet she seemed to have him cowed. When she was certain that I would not run she lifted a small silver bell and shook it to sound.

The butler opened the door and stood straight awaiting orders. "Smithers, we shall have tea and biscuits please." He bowed and closed the door again.

"Now my dear…" she paused. "Good heavens, where are my manners. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Lady Alice Whitlock, but you must call me plain Alice, there will be no airs between us. You are…?"

"Renesmee," I answered.

"But Jacob calls you Ness, no?"

"Yes."

"May I call you Ness as well?"

She was so genuine and gentle that I found myself relaxing in her presence. "Of course, my lady."

She shook her finger at me. "Now, now, it is Alice, and to prove it to you I shall tell you exactly who I am. I am determined that we shall be good friends, and as such you need to know the real me."


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Alice's story. Please note that there is a story of rape. It is not graphic, but should it be a trigger for you please read with caution.

Chapter 8

NPOV

"I am not exactly what you see before you, Ness. I am so much more, and so much less. It is why Jacob brought you to me," Alice began.

"He mentioned something about your being a master of… How did he put it? Reinvention?"

Alice laughed. "I am not certain that that is entirely accurate, but I will accept the compliment."

"Will you explain?"

"How old are you Ness?"

"I am just eighteen, ma'am."

She smiled and then looked a little sad. "I was three years younger than you when this story began. Imagine if you will, a girl of fifteen, daughter of a minor earl who made his fortune in trading precious stones from the east.

I was raised with indifference after my mother passed away, more often in the company of servants than family. Then my father remarried a woman only five years my senior."

I listened intently knowing that the loneliness and pain of this girl still lived in the woman before me.

"My step-mother was not fond of me and felt that my presence within her household divided attention from her. She began to push my father to find a husband for me. When the Earl failed to act my step-mother took matters into her own hands. She began to bring young men and some not so young men to visit the house, hoping to get an offer for me and get me out from underfoot. For three months this went on, until…" Alice paused and took a halting breath. Then she licked her lips and swallowed hard. A soft knock echoed about the near silent room and Alice bid the maid in to deposit the tea tray.

Once tea was set Alice dismissed the girl with a smile and thanks and began to lift the pot. Her hands were shaking, so I took it from her and smiled. "Please, my… Alice, allow me to 'play Mum' and serve you." She smiled at my jest and nodded. "Milk?" I asked.

"Yes please, and one sugar."

I poured the milk and tea into the china cup in tandem and then dropped a sugar in as well. Then I lifted the cup and handed it to her with a smile. "Please go on," I encouraged.

"Thank you." She took a sip and began again. "There came a time when the Lady brought a rather brash gentleman into the house. She introduced him as an old friend and explained to my father that she was certain this gentleman was a perfect match for me…" again she paused and sipped her tea. "He was not unpleasant to look at, but something in his manner and bearing… he made me feel ill at ease."

I watched her place the cup on the table and take a deep breath. I felt for her and wished to spare her such obvious distress. "Please, Alice, I do not require your tale. Jacob trusts you and therefore, I trust you."

"No! No. You must know that you are safe in my care. I will protect you because no one protected me. This gentleman, and I use the term loosely, his name was James Traveler. He had no title, no fortune, but he had expensive tastes and no desire to have to labour for his income. He saw me as a means to an end and so he schemed with my step-mother, Victoria, to earn both title and fortune through me. As the only child, my father could pass the title to my husband if he so chose, and should Victoria fail to produce an heir.

At first James attempted to court me. He brought me roses. Dozens of them. One a day for a month. He flattered me, he badgered me. Victoria touted his virtues. Still I was young and naive. I was certain that his intentions were pure. I talked to Victoria about how nervous he made me, and she assured me that what I was feeling was love.

She encouraged me to spend time with him, often without chaperone. I had no idea that such things were dangerous, not only to my reputation, but to my being, as well. James would steal kisses and press me to allow him liberties no lady would allow. Still, I remembered the lessons my other had instilled in me and refused him, even slapping him when he pushed too far.

James grew impatient. He asked for my hand. The Earl asked me how I felt about him, and I was honest. I informed my father that I did not think him honorable. My father listened to me for once, and refused the match.

James was furious. He demanded that Victoria speak to me and change my mind. I stood my ground, and Victoria told me I was an ungrateful wretch who had used James ill, and would pay for my insult. She insisted that I receive him one last time and make my refusal to his face.

He came upon me in the schoolroom. I had no companion as she had been let go when Victoria joined the house. She claimed that it was an expense that we could well do without, especially as she was there for me. James had been drinking I could smell it on his breath. He entered the room and closed the door behind him. Again he had a rose for me. I thanked him and attempted to move round him, but he blocked my exit.

He told me that things between us could be pleasant or hard. I was so young and naïve that I hadn't an inkling as to his meaning, but when he grabbed me I struggled."

I was young, but having been raised in a brothel I had no problem imagining where this story would lead. I reached out to grasp Alice's hand. She held fast and continued her tale.

"He was so much larger than I and so determined. I never stood a chance. He beat me," she swallowed hard and closed her eyes. "He took my innocence. When he was finished I ran from the room directly to my father's study. I wept at his feet and told him what had happened, but Victoria had convinced him that the only solution was for James and I to wed. After all what man would want a girl who was ruined. James was admitted to the room and agreed to wed me as long as he received my dowry and the promise of the title should no male heir be born. All three of them raised a glass in toast to my impending nuptials when I announced that I would not marry him were he the last man on Earth. My father said that if I did not marry him I was no longer his child. I was thrown from the house with what was left of the clothes on my back."

"Oh, Alice."

"I wandered the countryside for two days and nights before I collapsed in the street. It was Jacob who came upon me. He was traveling through and bundled me up in his carriage. He took me to his friend's estate. I do not remember much of what transpired in those first few weeks. I was out of my head with fever. I was broken and battered, and I almost died.

The lord of the manner was a doctor. He and his wife tended my wounds and healed my body. My mind was not so easily healed. Lord Carlisle and Lady Esme took me in. They employed me as a companion for their daughter, Rosalie. To be honest I believe they did for me so much more than I could ever repay.

They treated me as if I were not some ruined girl, but an equal, even after it became clear that I was with child. I swelled with James' bastard. Lord Cullen approached my father trying to ease a peace between us, but he called me an ungrateful whore who was no longer his concern.

My ruination was complete. That was when I first met Jasper. He was a school friend of Lord Cullen's son, Edward, and Jacob's. He was the most amazing creature I had ever met. I lost my heart to him in an instant, but I was great with child and he was an Earl in his own right.

He pursued me, even though I was so large. He was gentle and sweet. He told me that he cared nothing for the opinion of society he wanted me for his wife. He even offered to take the child as his own."

She took a deep draw of her tea and smiled at me with tears in her eyes. "As I said, he was the most amazing creature."

I smiled. "I am certain he would say the same of you."

"He would, but he would have been wrong at that time. I was such a wreck. I told him no. Actually I repeated it for weeks. Edward, Jacob, Rosalie, Lady Esme, and Lord Cullen all attempted to persuade me that I was good enough for Jasper as long as I believed I was. They were the best friends I have ever known. I had almost begun to believe them when I went into labour.

My lie in was not easy. In fact, it was…" she shook her head, "I had a still born babe, but that was not the worst of it. I bled so badly that they had to perform surgery on me. When I woke I was told not only of the loss of the child, but of the possibility that I might never be able to conceive another. I was certain it was a judgment upon me."

"Oh, Alice, no."

"I was in a very dark place, for a very long time. It took me over a year to even allow Jasper to visit me. Again he asked me to be his wife, and again I denied him. I was seventeen years old, and certain that my life was over. It was actually Jacob who came up with a solution I thought I could live with. He proposed that if I would not marry Jasper, perhaps I would consider being his mistress."

I choked on my tea, and it was Alice who patted my back and soothed me.

She was laughing when I calmed my cough and began again. "I wanted Jasper. In fact I loved him. I thought myself so beneath him that I thought this solution would at least allow us to be together. Jasper agreed reluctantly. He set me up in a lovely home. He showered me with gifts and servants. But most of all, he shared my life, my home, my bed.

It took him three years to convince me that he would never marry another and that if I did not agree to wed him he would leave me. I could not face a life without him, so I acquiesced. For the first few months of our married life he allowed me to adjust to being his wife. Then he insisted that we rejoin society. As I had never had a come out no one among the ton knew me, which was suspect in itself. Rosalie and Esme sponsored me and introduced me into society. We put it about that I was from Bath and that my parents were of a gentle family who did not visit town. I was welcomed by society because I had friends who eased my way, and a love who refused to allow me to be denied."

I smiled again at her.

"I actually ran into my father the year we attended the season. Victoria attempted to ingratiate herself with Jasper, but he rebuffed her, and my father never even acknowledged me."

"How awful," I sighed.

"Not really, I have all the family I need. I have a husband I love, friends I cherish, and parents in Lord and Lady Cullen. I am reinvented and that is what we shall do for you."

I stiffened at the thought. "So I must lie about my background?"

"No, I believe that we will polish off the rough edges and ensure the world sees the lovely girl I see before me. I am still the girl who was ruined, but I no longer see myself that way. We must ensure that you see yourself as Jacob sees you."

I nodded even though I felt unease. Then Alice took my tea cup from my hands and placed it on the table. She pulled me up to stand before her and looked me up and down. She shook her head and tut-tutted.

"I believe that the first thing we must do is have my modiste attend you at once. A lady must dress the part."

With that a whirlwind of activity began.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: An insight into Jacob's mind. He is a complicated young man. He is a bit deluded about things. Have patience he has a great deal to learn.

Thank you for all the lovely comments and reviews. Your opinions, questions, concerns, and theories thrill me, so please continue to review.

Chapter 9

JPOV

I followed Jasper into his study and paced while he poured me a snifter of his finest brandy. I was fuming. I had trusted Alice and Jasper to have a care with Ness. After all, I had been instrumental in easing the way for Jasper with Alice. I had cajoled and connived to allow them time together, and I had spent countless hours playing intermediary for their romance.

"Explain yourself friend, now, before I lose what is left of my civility," I growled.

"Take a seat, Jacob, and have a drink," Jasper said dismissively.

"I want an answer, Jazz! Why would you be unkind to someone for whom I asked you to care? She was crying. What did you do?"

Jasper took a seat in his wing-backed leather chair and put his feet up on its matching ottoman. "Alice will smooth it all over. I simply wanted to ensure that you had not been ensnared by a fortune hunter who would rob you blind. Embry told me what happened last evening at Mrs. Cope's. I could not believe my ears. Did you really spend ten-thousand pounds for her?"

"I'd have paid twenty had Mrs. Cope proved difficult," I said sinking into the companion seat.

Jasper whistled low and shook his head. "I had no idea that you had fallen so hard. Why have you never mentioned the girl before?"

I leaned forward as his words penetrated my mind. "Oh, no, you misapprehend me, my friend. I have known Ness since she was a mere child. I found her bright and funny. I befriended the little imp and saw to it that she received some education. When I heard about the auction it seemed providential. I could rescue my little friend and gain a wife that I knew would give me satisfaction by being the exact opposite of what my father desired," I said with a chuckle.

Jasper's brow furrowed. "So, you feel nothing for the girl?"

"I told you I find her charming. Even more so now that she has grown into such a beauty," I explained.

"Well, she is that."

"I sampled her virtues last evening. She was breath-taking."

Jasper raised a sardonic brow. "And she was a virgin? Or was that simply a sales device of Mrs. Cope to increase her price?"

"Oh no, she was indeed untouched. Still, it took every bit of chivalry I possess not to tupp her until she could not move," I confessed.

"Really? I cannot remember you ever speaking so about any of your past lovers. I can tell you that enjoying the marital act is quite a bonus to societal matrimony. Too many of our friends find bedding their wives a chore."

"So we have heard, repeatedly," I said sharing his humour. "I had not thought about that, honestly, but I must admit the thought cheers me. I cannot imagine having to beget an heir on some pail-faced milk-toast maid of the ton. My stomach roils at the thought. Ness is young and fresh and vibrant. She is curious and vivacious. I enjoy her company, if you can believe that. I actually spent the entire night by her side and did not…" the thought caught on my lips as it penetrated my mind.

"You did not…? What?"

"I have always found myself too restless to remain in the bed of my lovers. I cannot recall ever doing so, but I found slumber with Ness. She even helped me dress this morning. I enjoyed her company." I heard the wonder in my own voice as I acknowledged it.

Jasper eyed me over his snifter. "Still, I do not hear you pledging your undying affection for the girl."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you love her?"

At that question I burst into mirthless laughter. "Don't be ridiculous. Truth be told I barely know her. I haven't seen her in over two years. Had I passed her on the street I would not have recognized her. But when I heard about her being auctioned off… the thought sickened me. She was meant for more than that life, and I would have done just about anything to save her from it. But do not mistake my compassion for sentimentality. There is no room in my life for love. Not now, not ever."

"And why is that?"

"Love is a trap into which I intend never to fall."

Jasper sighed. It was an argument we had had several times over the years, especially when he and Alice were first married. I had had the same discussion with Edward, my other closest companion. They were both besotted with their wives and touted the virtues of finding love in marriage. "Jacob, surely you have outgrown your aversion to love by now."

"I have not, nor do I intend on doing so. I watched my father crumble because he lost his love. I felt the loss of my mother deeply, and swore to myself I would never again care for someone in that way. Love is too easily lost. I want none of it. Friendship, companionship, bed-play, yes, love, no thank you."

Jasper downed his brandy and shook his head. "I wish you luck with that. So, what exactly do you want Alice and I to do for you as regards the girl?"

"I plan to inform my father that I have found a bride. He will most certainly insist upon meeting her before the ceremony. I need a buffer. I also need to be certain that she will pass as a suitable match," I explained. "I spoke with Alice about it and she feels certain that we can invent an acceptable background for Renesmee that will satisfy my father. Ness will also need some instruction on swimming the seas of the ton before I present her in society. Alice said that she was willing to help, after all, I believe you both owe me for the time and trouble it took me to see you wed."

"Indeed." Jasper leaned forward and smiled. "You know, I think your Renesmee is quite lovely. She also has a deep concern for your well-being. When I told her that you could be disinherited if she married you she was determined to free you without so much as a sous in remuneration. I quite admire that."

"You told her what?!" I said jumping from my seat. "You must have frightened her. She hasn't an avaricious bone in her body. Why would you do such a thing?"

"I told you, I wanted to ensure your safety. You are my friend and I was not about to allow you to fall victim to a tart with gold in mind."

A soft knock sounded at the door and Jasper called for the butler to enter. "Lady Whitlock requests that you rejoin the ladies in the sitting room, sir."

"Thank you, Smithers," Jasper said standing. "You see, I told you my darling wife would smooth things over."

We crossed the hall and re-entered the cream and gold room. This was Alice's domain and it reflected her tastes. Things were soft and welcoming. The walls were covered in cream damask accented with golden fleur-de-lis and matched the upholstery on the settee and chairs. As we entered the room I saw Ness seated next to Alice, looking more relaxed and no longer crying. I smiled at her and she returned the gesture which made me feel more at ease.

"Please join us," Alice said standing and indicating that I take the seat she vacated.

I took the seat next to Renesmee and placed my hand at the small of her back. I leaned into her ear and whispered "Are you alright, Sweet?"

She nodded and I pulled her closer. Alice was pouring Jasper and I tea and talking a mile a minute, as was her custom, but I was not truly focused until Alice noticed my inattention. "Jacob, what is our timeframe?" she asked in an irritated tone.

"My apologies, Alice. I was thinking that we should arrange an introduction to my father by week's end. I intend to acquire a special license and should think we can be married in a fortnight."

Alice's eyes popped wide. "Well, in that case I shall require round the clock access to Ness. She will have to stay here. In fact that is probably for the best anyway. She can be married from our house your father will like that."

"Wait, you want her to stay here? I do not think that is necessary. I can deliver her to you as early as you like, but truly…" I had just begun to explore her. I certainly did not wish to be parted from her so soon.

"Oh it is quite necessary, believe me. We need to have my modiste in to make her a wardrobe. I will need time to ensure that she is prepared to meet your father. There are a million little things that need attending to, Jacob. We have room, and will see to it that she is well cared for."

I felt Ness tense beneath my hand. She said nothing, but I could tell she was no more excited by the prospect than was I. "Well then, I suppose you will have two house guests."

"Two?"

"Yes. There are certain things that only I can teach her before she meets my sire. We will need to appear comfortable with each other, and I will need to know the story we weave as well as she does. So I insist on staying with her. It is even more important if you plan on filling her days with fittings and such."

Ness looked to Alice with what I interpreted as hope in her big brown eyes. Alice pursed her lips and gave me an assessing stare. "Alright, if you insist. Now let us begin to devise the best tale to tell your father."

Ness bit her lip and frowned. "I am not an accomplished liar," she confessed.

"Then we shall have to keep our story as close to the truth as possible."

We told the Whitlocks the story of our meeting and subsequent friendship. Renesmee lit from within as she told them of what she deemed my 'unfailing kindness' toward her. It was funny, I had never thought of the attention I paid her as kindness. I enjoyed her lively mind and curious chatter. She amused me and that fact alone was why I had chosen to spend time with her.

Alice and Jasper listened intently and when we had finished Alice smiled broadly. "I believe I know exactly how to spin this yarn. We shall simply sanitize some of the more colourful details, but I believe your father will be as charmed by your choice of bride as we are."

"Let us hope so," I added. I was determined to move forward with this plan, and Father's acceptance was definitely required.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: A little chance for Alice to do her magic. Enjoy.

Chapter 10

NPOV

Alice moved into action. She informed Jacob that he would need to send for his clothes and valet if he meant to stay. Then she wrote a quick note and sent it out with a servant. She explained that she was sending for her modiste. She ordered the gentlemen from the room and explained that we had women's work to attend to. She called her maid and led me to an upper floor where I was escorted into a room done all in creamy brown and pale gold.

There was a small desk and chair, an open dressing area and vanity, and a connecting door which led to a small room which held a bathing tub and towels as well as a chamber pot surrounded by a screen. At the far end of that room was another door. Alice led me to the vanity and sat me down. She looked at my face in the mirror and squinted. She walked around me lifting my chin and turning my face this way and that. Finally she turned to her maid, whose name was Angela and asked "Where to start?"

"If I may, my lady," the maid began, "I believe that we should unbind her hair and see what we have. Then we should burn that dress. I would guess she is comparable in size to you. We can at least find her a shift to fit. That way Madame Baptiste will have a foundation to begin."

"I agree. Ness, will you help us unbind your hair? It is difficult to see so tightly wound."

I pulled the five pins I wore at the base of the bun that sat at the nape of my neck. My hair was fine, but curled, so when it fell and unwound itself it expanded somewhat. It hung almost to my waist, and had been a major bone of contention with Mrs. Cope. She constantly complained that red hair was considered unfashionable. Thus she insisted that I bind it and wear a mop cap until she decided to auction me. Then she allowed it to hang free. She said gentlemen like long hair. Still I worried that its colour would displease Alice. I looked down, not wanting to catch her eyes in the mirror.

"Oh my," said Angela in a whisper.

"Indeed," said Alice.

I lifted my eyes and began to apologize. "I know it is not at all fashionable to have red hair. Some of the girls spoke of soaking it in strong tea to muddy the colour to a more brown tone." I spoke quickly to attempt to ameliorate the damage.

"Don't you dare!" came a very male voice from the bathing room. Jacob entered the room in a very determined way. "Alice, I swear if you even consider dying her hair…"

"Peace, Jacob. I would never even think of altering the beautiful Titian tone of this glory." She leaned down and spoke to me in the mirror. "Every woman you meet will envy this mane, Ness, and every man will be fascinated by the play of light upon your tresses. You are quite lucky, my dear."

I searched her face for any deceit, but saw only guilelessness. I breathed a sigh of relief and watched Jacob smile at his friend. "Thank you, Alice."

"I thought you trusted me?"

"I do, I do. It is simply that I do not wish Ness to be altered into one of those twittering nincompoops of the ton." He placed his hands upon my shoulders and bent to my ear. "You have allurements and temptations that I would miss were they to be stripped from you."

I blushed at the compliment and smiled despite my attempts not to.

"See, there is one now," he said and kissed my cheek.

"Enough," Alice said sternly. "The modiste will be here soon and we need to present her a canvas that she accepts as a lady. Now go and amuse yourself, elsewhere."

"As you wish, I really wanted only to thank you for the room. Then Jasper pointed out the connecting room and I heard you in here with my little bird, and I had to come and see your progress."

"We have yet to make any, now go," she said pushing him from the room. "Tell Jasper to take you to the club. We will be most of the afternoon. Inform my husband that dinner will be served at eight. I will reveal our progress then. Now be gone."

Jacob smiled at me as he left, and Alice shut the door behind him. "Now let us begin," she said.

Angela brushed my hair with a soft bristled brush made of silver. When she was finished it shone. Then she began to twist and pin it in a sweeping style which utilized the curls to frame my face and made me look so much more polished than I had ever before imagined. Then it was on to clothing.

They were quite serious about burning the dress I wore. Alice said she had never seen anything so hideous in all her born days. Then she asked me with incredible care if I would be uncomfortable if she remained while Angela dressed me.

"Oh, I do not require assistance," I said shedding the garment in an instant. Angela let out a startled sound and rushed to cover me with a dressing gown. I was a bit confused until Alice calmed her and turned to me.

"Ness, ladies have maids to assist in dressing and undressing because they tend to wear significantly more clothes than you had on. I should have realized that your upbringing would not make that clear. I am sorry."

"Oh," I said feeling quite foolish. "Living in a…" I paused looking at Angela and realizing that it might be indelicate to divulge my upbringing before a servant.

"Not to worry, Ness, Angela is the soul of discretion; you need not fear saying anything before her. Besides, she can assist in educating you on the differences between proper behavior, and behavior which would raise suspicion."

I nodded. "Living in a brothel does not lend itself to discretion or modesty."

Alice laughed lightly. "I would suspect not. I would bet, however, that it does lend itself to exposing one to certain knowledge that many of the ladies of the ton only wished they had."

I looked at her completely confused. What knowledge could I have that society ladies would desire?

"Most ladies marry as complete innocents, Ness. I know that when my friend Rosalie was preparing to marry Emmett she was quite unaware of things between men and women. She is Lord Cullen's daughter, remember, the young lady I served as companion?" I nodded. "She is a year older than I am, and was just eighteen when she accepted Lord McCarty's proposal. I was the only fried she had who had any concept of what the marital act might entail, and my experience was not something I hoped for her. We discussed the practicalities, but that was really all I knew. When she became a wife she had quite a learning curve. When I decided to become Jasper's mistress… Well, I consulted her about her experiences."

Angela had exited the room and returned with an armful of material, just as Alice was finishing. She covered her mouth and giggled.

"Hush, Angela. Anyway, she taught me that I needed to relax and have trust in Jasper to guide me. He did, and it has been nothing but lovely. I have wondered, at times, though, if there were tricks of the trade that accomplished mistresses and doves know that we wives do not."

"Oh, I…" I licked my lips. "I have witnessed much, but have no real experience, save last evening."

Alice smiled. "There will be plenty of time to share stories later. Now we must get to work."

Work it was. They began by sliding a garment over my head. It was made of cotton and cut low. They called it a shift. It had short, snug sleeves and hung loosely to mid-shin. Next came a snug vest like contraption that came over the breast and snuggly cinched round my ribcage. It tied at the back of the straps over my shoulders and round the top of my breasts and had hard supports that Alice called "short stays." Angela tightened the string under my bosom and then the straps and suddenly my breasts looked fuller and more pronounced. "Lovely," she said.

Finally came a sleeveless garment with a ruffled hem. Angela turned me round and began the process of lacing up the back. She pulled it quite snug and I felt myself stand taller. When she was finished she turned me to the full length mirror and I saw a young woman. I no longer looked like myself to my eyes. I looked taller, and shapelier than I imagined myself. "I understand why you require assistance now."

"Well, you are now fit to meet Madam Baptiste. She will take your measurements and we will make some choices in fabric and fashions."

The modiste arrived and we did as Alice said. She took a tape and ran it round my neck, my arms, and my waist. She measured the length of my limbs, my torso, anywhere she could find. The woman was French and spoke with a heavy accent. Alice spoke the language and they conversed rapidly. When the measurements were taken we sat and looked at a book containing sketches. Alice chose dresses, trimmings, fabrics and laces. She ordered undergarments that would be made just for me, and after more hours than I could count signed the order form and told the modiste to send the bill to her, and she would see it delivered to Jacob.

Then Alice and Angela led me to the lady's room of the house. There they opened a series of wardrobes. I had never seen such sumptuous fabrics, nor such beautiful colors. Alice pulled several dresses from the collection and held them up to me. Finally she chose a dress of deep green. Angela slid it over my head and laced up the back. It curved low to frame my breasts, had sweetly capped sleeves, and an overskirt of filmy embroidered tulle. I kept running my palms down the skirts just to feel the satiny texture.

"Angela, you have outdone yourself."

I raised my eyes to the mirror before me and saw a mirage. There stood a woman who looked like me only more. She stood tall, her hair was stylish. Her dress complimented her coloring and made her look womanly and sophisticated. I hardly recognized myself.

"I believe you will more than do," Alice smiled. "Now while I change we can begin to revise your background. We will begin to finesse things and try it out on the men at dinner."

I took a seat and we discussed how to massage my story so that it was not a lie, but not strictly the whole truth. Instead of residing in a "nunnery" I was raised in a convent. The doves became "sisters" and Mrs. Cope became "Mother Superior." It explained why I was not out in society, but also made Jacob look a bit more respectable. Alice said that the Duke often thought Jacob's associations were less than desirable, and that associating him with a girl raised in a religious order would raise him in his father's eyes.

At seven bells Alice and I descended the stairs and entered the evening drawing room. It was paneled in deep rich wood. The carpet was the color of claret wine and the furniture was cushioned in an elegant burgundy satin. The gentlemen were already seated and talking quietly when the butler showed us in. Both men rose as we entered and I suddenly felt like a costumed fraud. In an instant Jasper was bending over my hand and smiling. "Good evening Miss Renesmee. Can I get you a drink?"

I was unsure of the proper response. I turned to Alice and she smiled. "I think we could both do with a glass of sherry, Love."

Jasper took Alice's hands and raised them to his lips. "Of course, dearest, anything you desire."

Then I heard a soft clearing of a throat and turned to find Jacob before me. He was dressed in a fine blue tailcoat, dark trousers, a buff waistcoat embroidered with gold, and a cravat tied in the most exquisite knot I had ever seen. His dark eyes bore into me and never left my face as he took my hand and sketched a bow over it. "Can this be my little bird? I have never seen her in such exquisite plumage."

"It is I," I said blushing. "The costume is borrowed from Alice, but the girl remains the same."

"I am glad to hear it," he said taking my hand and tucking it into the crook of his arm. "I can hardly wait to peel away the layers."

My eyes bulged at his words and he chuckled as he led me to sit on the settee beside him. Thus began an evening of conversation and incredible food and wine. I was certain I was dreaming, but I felt at ease and welcomed in this company. Perhaps I really could enter Jacob's sphere and not be an embarrassment. I said a prayer that I could, as the evening progressed and tried to enjoy myself, and my love.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

JPOV

After being summarily dismissed by Alice I joined Jasper and we made our way to White's. It was the finest Gentleman's club in all of London and exactly where we enjoyed our time. On the ride over we talked.

"I must admit, I am surprised at your insistence that you remain with Renesmee while she is with us. Care to explain?" he asked pointedly.

"Ness does not know you or Alice, and although I trust you, she has no reason to other than the fact of my say so. I feel responsible for her. After all in a matter of a day I have taken her from everything she has ever known. She is completely out of her element. It would not be fair to abandon her under such circumstances," I explained.

Jasper was a very astute friend. Sometimes it seemed as if he understood people's motivations before they understood them themselves. He eyed me with a look that said he thought there was more to it than that. "I suppose that is a good point. Still, she seems a sensible girl. Surely she can see that no harm will come to her in our care."

"Of course, after all, you were so very gentle with her when you first made her acquaintance," I growled still annoyed with his bullying tactics.

"I have already apologized, both to the young lady and to you. Do you plan to berate me for my unflagging protection of you for much longer?"

I huffed, but knew his intentions had been pure if his methods left something to be desired. "I forgive you I just do not want her abused in all this. In truth I did not think about what changing spheres would expose her to. She may have been raised unconventionally, but in truth she has led a relatively sheltered existence. I know that she was not allowed out of the nunnery often and then only to go to the green grocer or the bookseller. This must all seem very strange to her."

"Careful mate, you almost sound as if you genuinely care," Jasper teased.

"I do care," I said defensively. "She is under my protection. As the woman I shall wed she is my responsibility. I am not as feckless as you like to believe, you know."

"I have never called you feckless, only a little lost at times. Alice and I have only been concerned that you have eschewed some of your duty for non-serious pursuits, most of which you did not truly have any passion for. You have been living your life to annoy your father. That is hardly a serious pursuit."

"On the contrary, my bosom friend, I take that pursuit with all earnestness," I laughed.

"Then why are you going through with this? If you want to annoy his grace, why don't you just allow the time limit to pass and force him to disinherit you?" I knew Jasper understood that although I enjoyed irritating my father I would never allow him to pass the title, lands, and monies to my cousin, no matter how fine a man Samuel might be.

"You know full well I would have married, eventually. I would have forced myself to shackle my leg to some milky maiden of the ton and grown to hate her and myself within a few short months. I would have had a slew of mistresses and intrigues simply to maintain my grip on sanity. How wonderful that would have been for all parties involved? Then after watching me living the life I have avoided so assiduously my father would have no incentive to remain on this earth. He would not be willing to remain here, among the living for that."

Jasper placed a hand on my shoulder and gave me a look of heartfelt sympathy. "Have you considered telling him how you feel?"

I looked at him certain he had lost his mind. "Don't be ridiculous. How would your sire have taken to a declaration that you did not want him to die? That you resented his desire to join your mother in the grave and hated that a corpse meant more to him than a living son?"

"Point taken, still, I have always found your father to be a fair and reasonable man."

"Yes, well you only met him after he decided to attempt to rejoin the land of the living."

We exited the carriage and entered White's. We bypassed the crowd that I had spoken to only a day before. Quil Altera shot me a rather brooding look and I noticed a rather significantly bruised cheek. I wanted to feel ashamed, but in truth all I felt was justified.

Embry broke away from them and approached me. "Jacob, how goes it?"

"I understand why you offered details to Jasper and Alice last evening, but I trust you were more discrete here," I hissed in an aside.

"I have said nothing to anyone else. I am your friend, Jacob. I would not betray you."

I stopped and looked him in the eye. "I know and I thank you for your loyalty."

"Are you still determined to continue on this course?" he asked.

"I am."

"Then I wish you nothing but the best and shall dance at your wedding celebration." He offered me his hand and I shook it firmly.

"Thank you, Embry."

He nodded and retreated back to the circle he usually associated with. I caught up to Jasper just as he met up with our dear friend Edward, Lord Masen. Edward and I had been school-mates. When my mother passed, Edward's mother, Lady Esme had scooped me up in her motherly arms and ensured that I was cared for and coddled. I practically lived at the Cullen Estate from the time I was fourteen. Edward, Rosalie, Alice and I played and learned together. It was in that house that I learned the lessons that made a boy a man. How a gentleman behaves, how he is expected to treat others, how his measure is taken by his compassion and fairness.

They were lessons I should have learned at my father's side, but he was not present when I needed them. It was Carlisle, Lord Cullen who guided and advised me. Unfortunately I learned each lesson and then took each and corrupted it to irritate and annoy my father most efficiently. Carlisle would shake his head at me and express concern, but he never expressed disappointment, as my own father did. Carlisle knew that when no one was looking I applied his advice and care to those I encountered. In fact I had gone to him when I wanted to be of assistance to Nessie. I did not tell him her exact circumstances, but he did guide me to Monsieur Alistair. It was his approval I always sought when I had a difficult decision to make. It was he I had consulted about joining the regiment with his son.

Edward and I had both felt strongly about defeating Boney and had purchased our commissions together. We had gone with Jasper and Emmett, Rosalie's husband. We were a band of brothers connected and dedicated to returning together. We fought together and looked out for one another ensuring that none of us was lost upon the battlefield. It was why we all joined in tandem, and it worked. Not a one of us was left behind. I returned each man to his lady love.

Edward was pledged to Lady Bella Swan. She was a bright and bonnie lass who had captured him heart and soul. When he had confessed his desire to fight she had borne it well, as had Rosalie and Alice, at least before their respective loved ones. They all joined forces however, and descended upon me and demanded that I return their men to them unharmed.

I had agreed to go, and do my utmost to see to it each of my mates returned to their respective lady. I promised to take any injury meant for them if it was within my power, and I meant it. I had even sworn it. I explained to Lady Esme, when she tried to dissuade me, as she had each of us, that I alone had no one waiting on my return and no one to mourn my passing should I fall upon the field. She had wept and told me I was a fool who never understood the heart. I agreed, but never fully understood her meaning. Still we all fought and all returned sound.

As I approached Edward came and shook my hand. Emmett slapped me soundly on the shoulder and as usual I stumbled under the act. "God Emmett, hasn't Rosalie taught you any manners yet?"

"I no longer slurp my soup," he said jovially.

I raised a brow and shook my head. "I really must speak to that woman."

"My apologies, Jacob, I always forget how delicate you are."

"Ballocks!" I growled. It had ever been this way between us. Rosalie was even worse than he. She had referred to me as pup, Edward's lap dog always nipping at her heels. She and I spared by way of conversation, but it was always in fun, just as it was with Emmett.

"Gentlemen," Jasper said leading us all to a private room within the club. We closed the door behind us and took seats as Edward poured us drinks. "I lift my glass to the last of our ranks to fall to the inevitable arrow. He who has fought the hardest to remain a bachelor has finally been captured by a pair of fine eyes and a sweet smile. I give you our fallen brother, Jacob" Jasper said the speech dramatically and with wry humour and then drank deeply from his glass.

Edward and Emmett stared, first at Jasper and then at me. I raised my glass and bowed then rose and drank.

"Say it is not so," Emmett said dramatically falling back against the back of a chaise, hand over his heart. "This cannot be true."

"Oh, but it is. I have found myself a bride, and just in time, I might add."

Edward eyed me as he walked around the couch and took his seat. "Quite fortuitous, I wonder, though, will she be able to withstand the scrutiny of the women of our merry band? You do realize that Bella, Rosalie, and Alice would eat alive any fortune hunter you attempted to foist upon us. Not to mention what my mother would do."

"Alice already likes her," Jasper said. "In fact, she is temporarily residing with us. She is a charming girl, far better than Jacob could have hoped for, in fact."

"You are serious. Jacob, who is it?" Edward seemed concerned. He had ever been the closest friend of the party. He and I had schooled together and known each other the longest. He was not likely to accept that I wed for mercenary reasons.

"I have in fact known her for some time. I had not considered that she might be willing to marry me until Father set his condition for my inheriting. I assure you, however, that she is the only woman I have ever truly considered shackling my leg to."

"Jolly Good!" Emmett enthused and downed his drink in one. "When do we meet her?"

I turned to Jasper looking for assistance, but he smiled broadly and said "How about Thursday. Alice would love to have a dinner party, and I am certain that Bella and Rose would be delighted to join in on the fun."

"Jasper," I said in a slightly choked tone, "that is only four days away."

"I know, but what better way to ensure that she is prepared to meet you father? You did say you wanted them to meet at weeks end, did you not?"

It was true I had. Alice would have to work fast. "Perhaps you could invite Lord and Lady Cullen as well. Carlisle and Esme's approval would surely go far in my father's eyes."

That was that. The matter was settled. We were all set to break Nessie into our circle of friends. We left it at that and enjoyed lively conversation and exchanged news and gossip until it became time for us all to return to our respective homes.

Jasper and I returned to the house in Grosvenor Square and excused ourselves to freshen up and change for dinner. Bertie had, of course, come to me at the Whitlock's. He informed me that he was quite settled in the servant's quarters. He saw to it that I was properly shaved and attired for dinner. In fact, he tied my cravat so beautifully I had to spend a full five minutes complementing him. I also assured him that no one else would ever best him.

I met Jasper in the sitting room and he poured me a brandy while we waited for the ladies. "How do you think it will have gone today?" I asked, genuine concern marring my tone.

"Alice will be in ecstasy, I am certain. She will have spent the afternoon ordering clothes and God knows what else, and all on your account. I would bet she has rarely had such fun. Your pocketbook may be dented significantly."

"I do not care what it costs. It will ensure that I never have to worry about funds. I am more concerned about Ness, and how she will be holding up."

Smithers cleared his throat, just then and opened the door. Alice walked in looking lovely as always. She wore a gown of pale violet that complimented her well. We stood and each sketched a bow to her. Then Jasper walked over to them, obstructing my view of Nessie as he kissed her hand. "Good evening Miss Renesmee. Can I get you a drink?"

"I think we could both do with a glass of sherry, Love," Alice said smiling.

Jasper took Alice's hands and raised them to his lips. "Of course, dearest, anything you desire."

As he moved to her side my eyes were stunned at the sight before me. There stood the most exquisite beauty. I thought I had taken the measure of Renesmee the woman, but I was wrong. She was dressed in a deep green gown which clung to her curves in a way only a desperate man would. She stood taller. She looked older. She took my breath away.

She was focused on the exchange between Jazz and Alice so I cleared my throat and she turned to me. My eyes bore into hers and never left her face as I took her hand and sketched a bow over it, raising it to my lips and lingering. "Can this be my little bird? I have never seen her in such exquisite plumage."

"It is I," she said blushing. "The costume is borrowed from Alice, but the girl remains the same."

"I am glad to hear it," I said taking her hand and tucking it into the crook of my arm. "I can hardly wait to peel away the layers."

Her eyes grew large and I laughed low as I led her to the settee. I found that I could not keep my eyes from her. My ears focused on the sound of her voice. All through the evening I found myself touching her. I held her hand. I placed my palm at her waist. When we were seated at dinner I pressed my thigh against hers. I simply could not bear to be parted from her by any significant measure.

After a dinner which I had not truly tasted we retired to the sitting room and shared tea and conversation. At one point I called Ness "little bird" in front of Alice.

"Alright, spill, why do you call her that?"

"Well, first of all she tumbled from a perch in a tree. Then I heard her sing. Her voice is so sweet that the birds grow silent to listen."

Ness turned to me. "Is that truly the reason?"

"Yes, Sweeting."

"Well then, I believe you must grace us with a song. Please?" said Alice.

Ness paled slightly and I was worried. I had only heard her sing in the brothel. She sang naughty songs. I did not think Alice would be impressed with that. "Alice, perhaps…"

""No, Jacob, I can certainly sing for her. After all she has spent so much time and trouble with me this day." She stood and walked over to the piano-forte. She began to play a plaintive air that wove itself through the room. Then she opened her mouth and raised her voice. The song spoke of a lost love, of how her heart had been broken and how she would never love again.

It was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. When she finished Alice and Jasper gushed over her. I could not bring myself to speak. Instead I walked up to her, assisted her in standing and without thought bent down and kissed her deeply in front of all our company.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Prepare for Jacob to be schooled by Alice. And Ness decides to utilize some of the things she saw as she prepared for her auction and see if she has the ability to please the man she loves.

Chapter 12

NPOV

I was once again in his arms and being swept up in the all-encompassing flame of desire when I heard Alice clear her throat. Jacob lifted his lips from mine and I opened my eyes. He was staring into my face and the pads of his thumbs caressed my cheeks.

"Jacob Black," came Alice's clearly irritated voice, "I have allowed you far too many liberties with this young lady as it is, but you must not teach her that this behavior is acceptable in public. Now unhand her and show some decorum."

Suddenly I felt exposed and embarrassed. I stepped back from the circle of his arms and felt a rush of cold air against my heated skin. My eyes fell to the floor. Alice had spent all day attempting to elevate me in word and deed, and in an instant I was once again the urchin from the brothel. "I am sorry, my lady," I apologized.

I felt Alice's hand upon my arm and lifted my head to look at her. "You have absolutely nothing to apologize for, Nessie. It is this, gentleman, and I use the term loosely, who owes you one."

I turned to face the gentleman in question and saw an unrepentant Jacob. "How often was I subjected to sweet moments between you and my friend here, Alice?"

"Sweet moments are not private moments. Jacob, I fear you are the one we need to make fit for society, not Ness. What would your father think should he see her allow such liberties in company?"

Jacob's coal black eyes narrowed and he took a deep breath. "You do know I hate it when you are right, Alice?"

"I do, but it is not only you who must face the gossips should you be indiscreet. We need to establish Renesmee as a proper young woman. We are trying to pass her off as having been raised in a religious order. I can guarantee you that that kind of display would not be tolerated in such a setting."

"You have made your point, Alice," Jasper said easing her from her assault on Jacob. "I am certain that Jacob will work on his discretion, won't you Jacob?"

Jacob took a few slow deep breaths. "Of course."

"Why don't we all call it an evening? I am certain that all the excitement of the day is beginning to wear on you ladies. Tomorrow is another day, and I would wager you will have some curiosity seekers to contend with," Jasper suggested.

"Whatever do you mean by that?" Alice asked.

"We ran into Edward and Emmett at the club today and invited them and their wives to dine with us on Thursday. I would wager, however, that once they relate Jacob's intentions Bella and Rosalie will be here as soon as the hour to visit arrives."

"Oh my, I would not take that wager. Perhaps I should invite Esme to join them. It will be inevitable that they will descend on us en masse," Alice giggled.

"I forbid it," Jacob said. "I will not have them overwhelming Ness until you deem her prepared for them."

"Jacob, she is prepared for anything. She is as you so eloquently put it, a delight. She is well spoken and well mannered. She is quick witted and charming. It is you I have doubts about. You have been so long behaving as though society had no hold on you that it is you who are inappropriate and indiscrete. She will swim these seas beautifully with very little preparation. Of her I have no doubt. You, on the other hand, concern me greatly. Tomorrow I want you to take Jasper and go and visit your father. I want you to put your tail between your legs and make nice. Ask him to dine with us on Sunday to meet your intended, and we will make a party of it."

Jacob bristled with anger, but he nodded curtly. "If you will excuse us, I believe Jasper is correct, the hour grows late and we should perhaps rest and allow our heads to cool ere we speak again."

Alice's face softened and she touched Jacob's hand. "Goodnight, friend."

"Goodnight, Alice," he said then he leaned in and kissed her cheek. "I am sorry for my lapse in decorum."

"You are forgiven," she demurred, "now take care of your little bird, I believe you have discomfited her."

Jacob offered me his arm and led me from the room. He covered my hand with his own and led me up to our sleeping quarters. He took me to the door of the dressing room I had been in this afternoon. Angela was there with another young woman. She was small and blonde with wide blue eyes.

"I shall wait for you next door, Sweeting. Do not dally with her, ladies," he instructed the servants.

"Miss Renesmee, this is Jane. She has been trained as a lady's maid here, if you find her satisfactory, my lady says you may have her for your household," Angela informed me.

I smiled and nodded. Angela curtseyed and departed leaving me alone with Jane. "Good evening, Miss," she said with a curtsey.

"Good evening, Jane."

"Would Miss like me to ready her for bed?" The girl asked.

"Oh, yes, of course."

Jane stepped behind me and began to unlace my gown. Then she pulled it gently from my head. I stood in the chemise, short stays, and shift. She walked to a chest of drawers and pulled out a gossamer night rail and brought it to me. It was white and diaphanous. It had long sleeves that gathered at the wrist and a pale blue ribbon that gathered below the breast.

"Lady Alice sent this Miss. She said it would make you look a gift." The girl blushed and tittered as she laid the garment over a chair and made to undress me.

"She is very kind," I said.

"That she is, Miss. I do hope that you will find me satisfactory, Miss. I should like to have a lady of my own to tend to."

I smiled at the girl in the mirror and she blushed again and then bit her lip as if she was afraid she had said too much.

When she had unlaced the stays and then removed them and the shift, the night rail was slid over my head and tied at the breast. I noticed that the sleeves puffed in and out down my arms and that they looked incredibly intricate. Jane helped slide a dressing gown over the night rail and bid me take a seat before the gazing glass.

She undid the pins in my hair and brushed it out to a shimmering halo that blanketed my back. She stepped back and looked at her work before her. I looked too. "Will I do, do you think?" I asked.

"You are the bonniest lady ever," she said with a smile.

"Thank you, Jane. You may go."

She curtseyed again and left me alone. The image before me was again a revelation. I saw myself there, but this version was polished and pampered. I ran my hands across the material of the dressing gown and noticed its softness and luster. I hoped that I would hold some allure for Jacob in this garb.

I took a moment to calm my wildly beating heart and then took my hair and began to braid it for the night. I was about halfway done when Jacob entered through the connecting room. I saw him in the mirror. He wore a ruby dressing gown that was tied at his waist, but open from neck to the flat planes of his stomach. The firelight glinted off his muscled chest and my hands stopped forgetting the pattern they had known since childhood. He smiled and took my shoulders in his hands. His face was beside mine in the glass and he smiled at me from behind.

"I could not wait a moment longer. What is taking you so long?"

"I was just braiding my hair," I explained.

He looked down at the rope I had made and took it in his hands. "Please don't. I love your hair down. May I?" he asked taking the hair from my hands and running his fingers through it unraveling the braid I had created. He massaged my scalp as he whispered into my ear.

"When we are married I shall bid you wear it down as often as possible. I will luxuriate in its softness and bury myself in its intoxicating aroma. He buried his face in my hair and breathed deeply then his hands slid from my hair to my neck and he eased it to the side before his lips found the skin there and left open-mouthed kisses along the column. With no thought and no will my body melted against him. My breathing was becoming ragged and warmth was beginning to spread from my very center to my extremities.

"Come, Sweet, I can wait no longer," he said scooping me from my seat and carrying me through the bathing room into the boudoir. The fire blazed in the hearth and a plush rug sat before it. He walked us over to the fireplace and set me upon my feet once again. He smiled softly at me and took my face in his hands. "I must admit Alice is a genius."

"So you approve of the transformation?"

"What transformation?"

"Mine. Alice spent all day primping and polishing me."

He shook his head. "You needed no polish. You are perfect. You should have been brought up to this. The crime is that you have not had this pampering your entire life."

Again he began to kiss my neck, and again I began to melt in his hands. His fingers untied my dressing gown and slid it from my shoulders. Then his fingers wound themselves in the ribbon at my breast and undid it sliding the night rail off my shoulders and down my arms. He gently tugged one sleeve from my wrist and then the other. The garment pooled at my feet until I stood naked before him. Then he took my hand in his own and placed it upon his chest. "Then again, had you been raised in this world you would never have given me a second look."

"I highly doubt that," I smiled. My hands began to slide against his skin feeling the smooth texture and the hard muscles beneath.

"I would not be fit for you were to the manor born. As it is I am unworthy."

My hands stilled instantly and I looked into his face expecting to see his teasing face. What I saw stopped me in my tracks. "Why would you say that?"

"Alice is right. I have spent so much time flouting the strictures of society that I am the risk in this, not you. I promise to do better, Ness. Forgive me."

I slid my hands to his waist and pulled him forward. "Jacob, there is nothing to forgive."

I wanted to ease his discomfort so I pulled the dressing gown from his limbs. He stood before me in all his glory and I was awestruck by his beauty. I let my hands dance across his planes and valleys touching every inch. I tried to remember what the girls had said about what men liked. I recalled them saying that when they were tense it sometimes eased them to have their backs massaged. I gently tugged Jacob's hands until he lay face down on the rug before the hearth.

I began at his neck and shoulders. I rolled my palms from the center out following the line of his muscles. I pressed my fingers along the blades of his shoulders and applied a steady kneading pressure. My hands smoothed across his skin in an even and repetitive manner. Each pass of my hands meant a lessening of the tension in that area. As he began to relax I began to follow my hands route with my lips and tongue. Soon I heard him moan and I became boulder. My hair fell across his back and I began to swish it to increase the sensations he was feeling.

Suddenly he rose and flipped over taking me in his arms and kissing me senseless. His hands found my breasts and he rolled the pebbled nipples between his fingers until they were super sensitized. I arched into him and he lowered his lips from my mouth to my breasts. He suckled first one and then the other. I felt myself begin to flood in my nether regions and my hands sought his flesh.

I found his turgid shaft and stroked him only to find that the action caused him to release my nipple and suck in a breath. I watched his face and saw pleasure, not pain so I drew my hand from the base of his shaft to the satiny tip. I felt him move in my hand and felt so powerful. Again I stroked from tip to base and he arched his neck letting out a guttural moan and falling onto his back, taking me with him.

"Am I doing it wrong?" I asked as my insecurity won out.

"No, you are…" he swallowed thickly and urged me on, "doing it perfectly."

"You told Alice you had things to teach me. Is this what you meant?" I asked increasing the speed of my strokes.

"What would you like to learn?" he asked.

I licked my lips and sat up looking over his beautiful form. The lance in my hand stood out from the dark curls at the apex of his thighs and in my eyes it was amazing. I ran a single finger around the ridge at the head and saw it dance in my hand. I looked at Jacob's face and saw anticipation and desire and I felt emboldened.

"Will you tutor me in what pleases you?" I asked.

"Oh, you please me, believe me," he said.

I leaned over him and tentatively kissed his manhood. It was hot against my lips but so silky. I ran my tongue across the seam and found a sweet and salty bead of liquid. I remembered watching some of the girls pleasure men in this way. They said that it was almost universally enjoyed by men. What they neglected to tell me was that it could be pleasurable for the giver. I slipped my lips over his lance and heard him moan. I ran my tongue around the head as I deepened the depth of his intrusion into my mouth. "God Ness," he sighed.

His exultation encouraged me and I began to slide him deeper and deeper into my mouth and down my throat. With each stroke I found myself more and more exhilarated. Then I felt his hands reach my waist and lift me over him. It gave me a better angle and I was able to take him even deeper. I felt so empowered as I learned the signals his body gave me. This stroke meant a sigh, this one a moan. I liked it.

When his fingers slid between my thighs and spread them opening me to his ministrations I found myself taking him more boldly and deeper. When He slid a finger into my sheath I slid him completely down my throat and suckled him as he had my breasts. I loved the feel of him there, and I knew he enjoyed it by the sounds he made and the rumble I felt from beneath me. Then his tongue began to explore my core. He found the bundle of nerves at the front and sucked it into his mouth, running his tongue across it and I moaned.

He was still buried in my throat and he let out a cry before he flooded me with his salty seed. I swallowed the sticky substance and felt a surge of power knowing I had brought him this pleasure. I felt him begin to soften and slipped him from my lips.

In an instant he was again running his tongue across my bud and I felt myself begin to spiral. He added another finger, stroking me in time to his pressure on my nerves. I rose to a shattering climax and felt as if I had broken into a million pieces before drifting back down to earth. When I was beginning to catch my breath I noticed that Jacob was again at full mast.

He slid from beneath me and eased me onto my back. His face glistened with my juices and he leaned over me and whispered "You are incredible."

I smiled and pulled his lips to mine. I opened to him and he slid his tongue between my lips. I tasted myself upon his lips and it excited me all the more. Then he entered me. It was sharp and quick, so unlike the previous night. It was frenzied and raw and somehow it was even more powerful. I did not think I could climb again so soon, nor so high, but this time it was even more intense and stronger. When I reached my peak I clung to him as if to life. Every muscle in my body tensed like a tightly strung instrument he had plucked to perfection and my entire body bowed off the floor as I milked his seed from the depths of his very soul. When we were spent we lied there in each other's arms catching out breaths and clinging to one another.

"Ness?"

"Hmm?"

"In case you wondered…" he panted. "That is exactly how to please me."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

NPOV

Lying in the warmth of his arms I melted into him until I was uncertain as to where he began and I ended. It was heaven. I still prayed that I did not awaken from this blissful dream. His hand drew lazy circles across my shoulder and his breathing began to calm.

I felt boneless and sated. This was miraculous. I found myself lifting my head and looking at his perfect face. He looked up at me with those fathomless black eyes. They crinkled at the corners as he smiled at me. Then he rose slightly and bundled me against his chest so we were sitting before the fire snuggled in the cocoon of intimacy we had created. It felt safe. It felt right.

"Jacob?"

"Yes, Sweet?"

"May I ask you something, it may be foolish?"

"Do you remember what I told you when you were young?"

I did in fact remember. I was always so full of questions, but had been taught by the doves and Mrs. Cope to keep my own counsel. They said questions were dangerous. I had told Jacob what they said and he responded as only he could. "The only foolish question is the one you do not ask," I repeated his words back to him.

"Exactly, now ask away."

"Well," I said sitting up and turning to look at him. "I was curious about why you do not get along with your father?"

He stiffened a bit and I was certain he would refuse to answer, but as usual I was mistaken. "It is a long story and not a terribly happy one. You see when my mother died my father was devastated. Well, we both were. She was the most wonderful woman, Ness. She was beautiful and kind. She was perfection. She loved with all her heart, until she could no longer."

His face clouded with sadness the like I had never seen. Then it reset itself into a mask of indifference. He looked past me as he spoke the rest and I tried to find the Jacob I knew and loved, but he did not seem to be there.

"She was ill for a long time, years. I went off to school in the meantime. I was home for holidays, but otherwise I was separated from her and my father. As the time grew short I visited less and less. Father would later claim that he was trying to spare my young sensibilities. In truth, he wanted what time was left all for himself."

I was certain he was mistaken, but he no longer seemed to be speaking to me, but almost to himself.

"I was sent for when she departed this world. I did not even get a chance to say goodbye. Of course, she had not sought my company either. I wrote to her, but she did not answer, either because she was too ill, or because she was preparing to leave me and could not spare the time to bid her only child a proper farewell.

In any case, when I did return home for the funeral, my father… Well, he was a shadow of the man I had known. He looked as if he had not slept in ages. He was thin and… He was different. When I arrived home I thought we could comfort each other, but he refused to be in the same room as me. It was then that he dove head first into the bottle. He resided in his room above stairs and after the funeral he only came out at night, and then only to rant and rave.

I returned to school at his insistence, or so the servants told me. He never wrote. My letters went unanswered. He never sent for me for holidays. Were it not for my friend Edward I would have been all alone for the last four years of my schooling. He invited me home with him. The Cullen's estate borders my fathers, and Lord Cullen informed him that I was safe within his care. Still, I saw him but little.

I was at Oxford when he crawled back out of the bottle. He attempted to exert his control over me then. He summoned me back home and when I got there attempted to lay down dictates about my behavior, my friends, and my life. He told me that he loved me," he laughed a harsh disbelieving sound. "I told him I had no need of that particular emotion, and never would. I had managed to grow to maturity without it and I intended to continue my life as I saw fit.

We have dealt with each other only occasionally since. He attempts to lay down edicts and I do my best to flout him at every turn. It worked well for us up until he fell ill."

"You did say he was unwell and that was why you had not been in town," I remembered aloud.

"Yes, when I returned from the war I had hoped that he would have seen me as the man I had become. I went home to find him broken and sick. He suffered a seizure of some kind, according to Lord Cullen, who is his personal physician. He was left with weakness in his limbs and slow speech. Carlisle told me that he needed much care, and that he had let much of the estate fall into disrepair. I spent the last six months straightening out the mess I found. Somehow, I thought that would prove to him that I was capable. Instead it convinced him that I needed now, more than ever, to settle into the life he envisioned for me.

He threatened to disinherit me should I fail to marry before a month's time. He means to give my title, my lands, and my home to my cousin, Samuel, should I not bow to his decree."

"Now I understand why you are bent on marrying so quickly. I am a bit confused as to why you would choose me, though."

At that Jacob seemed to come back to me. He smiled again and I saw the man I had loved for so long, once more. "I would have a wife whom I can stand. I have seen the offerings of the ton. I could not bear to be faced with that forever after. When I went to the brothel that night I had no more thought of marrying you than I did of sprouting wings. Then I saw you. I remembered how much pleasure I had experienced in your company, how sweet and funny you were. All that in combination with the beauty you had grown into convinced me that I could find some measure of happiness with you."

He lifted his hand and cupped my face. Then he drew me forward and kissed me. It was sweet and gentle and in a moment he was laying me down beside him again. "The fact that you are so talented at bed-play is only an added bonus." He accentuated this point by slipping his hand between my thighs and sliding his fingers through my moist folds. I sucked in a harsh breath as again he found the perfect way to enflame my desire for him. He caressed me until his finger found the bundle of nerves at the apex of my sex. He circled it again and again and I began to move with his ministrations.

He was staring into my face and I began to feel exposed. I turned my face away, but in a moment he stopped his stroking and with his other hand turned my face back to his. He kissed me again sliding his tongue against my own. "You must never be embarrassed with me, Sweet. There can be no secrets between us here. I need to know you will give me everything you have, and I will learn it and use it to bring you immense pleasure. You must learn me as well. Only then can we share the glory of ecstasy together."

Again he began to stimulate me with his touch. He focused his stare on my eyes and I felt pinned there, lost in the sensations he was giving me, and the glory of his beauty. I licked my lips as my breaths became harsher. A wicked smiled graced his countenance and he took my lips with his own again.

"That's it Ness, you feel the quickening?" he asked.

I nodded and tried to calm myself, but his hand never let up. He knew just how to touch me and just how to lift me higher and higher. Then he slid a long finger into my wet sheath. I arched off the rug with the pleasure of it, and still he watched me.

"God you are so beautiful. Now let me see, give me your euphoria. Let go."

His words in conjunction with his hands were too much for me and I came apart in his arms. I cried out and clung to him as my world exploded in light and sound. I shook and shook as every nerve ending delighted in his touch. Just as I was floating back to earth he replaced his finger with his swollen manhood and began the dance all over again. I could not believe that there was more pleasure to be had, but he moved within me and again I was soaring. Every time I thought it was over he found a new angle or a new rhythm to bring me higher and higher. By the time he found his own satisfaction I felt like I had been rung out. I could not move if I wanted to. Our bodies were covered in a thin sheen of perspiration and suddenly I began to shiver.

"Oh, Sweet," he said slipping from my body, "You are chilled."

He scooped me into his arms and carried me to the bed. He drew back the counter plane and slid me between the warmth, joining me. He kissed me and wrapped me in his arms. His body was hotter than any fire could be and I warmed almost at once, but I so loved being there I did not attempt to move from him.

"You are amazing, do you know that?"

"In what way am I amazing?" I asked.

"I have never known a woman who could do what you have done. That was incredible. Every time I think I have found your limit you surpass it. You may be the death of me at this rate," he laughed against my neck.

"I am sorry," I said trying to rectify the situation.

He only pulled me closer. "Never be sorry for that."

He wrapped himself around me and I felt his breathing even out as he drifted off to slumber. I was so aware of him there that sleep eluded me for some time. I thought over all that he had told me this evening. How sad he must have been. A mere boy suddenly alone in the world.

Still, I knew that despite his protestations he still longed for his father's love. If not why would he have stayed and cared for him? What would possess him to attempt to pass me off as a lady to gain his father's approval? In that moment I decided that I would do everything in my power to be what his father would want for his son. I would do all I could to bridge the divide between these two men. If it were in my power I would help His Grace to find a reason to cling to life and reconcile with his son.

I imagined presenting Jacob and his father with the next generation to carry on their line. A dark haired babe to bond them together in fatherhood. Yes, Tomorrow I would ask Alice about the Duke and how to ingratiate myself to him.

I entwined my fingers with Jacob's and smiled. I imagined us as a happy family. I had never had a family, and although one cannot miss what one has never known I had longed for domestic felicity for as long as I could remember. I would love them and they would love me in return. The world I had always imagined was opening before me and although I had no idea how I had found it I was determined to keep it.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

JPOV

Again I slept deeply and dream free. At least until just before I awoke. In that instant between sleep and waking I moved my arms and came up with air. I was wide awake in an instant. I sat bolt upright and looked around for my sweet girl. As I turned to my right I saw her curled into a little ball. She had made herself so small. I must have rolled over. That was why she was not in my arms.

I looked at her magnificent hair all spread out about her like a cocoon. I lifted a lock of the coppery stuff and wound it round my finger. God she was exquisite. I slid across the bed and once again cradled her in my arms. Almost instantly her body uncurled and she burrowed against me. When she felt my heat she sighed contentedly. I breathed in her heady aroma. She smelled of roses and vanilla. The scent reminded me of something, although I could not quite place it. All I knew is it gave me a feeling of serenity and sanctuary.

I stroked her soft skin and luxuriated in its texture and reveled in the small intimacy. I smiled. I had not really known this was possible. I was pleased with the situation. I could see myself content with Ness by my side. I could not imagine myself becoming bored with her any time soon. Oh, it would happen, it was inevitable, but perhaps we could bash about for a significant amount of time before the urge to move on to greener pastures reared its head. Perhaps we would have a few children before we began to lead different lives.

I had never wished to spend any time with my past lovers. It was too dangerous to risk engendering emotions for which I had no time. Ness however was safe. She was raised in a brothel. Surely she of all people knew love was no more than a delusion people adopted when they lost sense and reason. She would not want that, she would understand that a practical, mutual enjoyment was preferable to messy emotions.

I could be safe with Ness. If she did not delude herself with the idea of love then she would not lose that emotion and feel the need to depart. We were friends. We had ever been friends. That was a relationship that would last and I would be assured that she would remain beside me in that capacity.

I knew the value of friendship. I had taken care to surround myself with loyal and true friends. Lord Carlisle and Lady Esme had seen me through the toughest of times and always given me the sagest advice. Edward, Bella, Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and even Rosalie were people I trusted to never abandon me when I was in need. These relationships I trusted. These relationships lasted.

I had been saddened when my friends fell. Edward was besotted with his wife. He thought her the most amazing creature he had ever known. She felt the same for him, but I had counseled him to be careful. I warned him that love left him vulnerable to hurt. He acknowledged it, but said that without risk life became deadly dull.

It had been the same with Emmett when he wooed Rosalie. I was powerless to stop him from plummeting deep into danger and loving her. Although I figured that Rose was feisty enough that Emmett could get as good as he gave.

Jasper had been obsessed with Alice. He felt so much that when she refused him repeatedly he had been inconsolable. I had had to rescue him one night when in a drunken state he had gotten into a brawl in the street. I assisted him in extricating himself from danger, but we had both ended up bruised and battered. I had taken him back to my rooms to see to his split lip and wrap his bruised ribs when he had broken down and wept. He begged me to convince Alice to accept him because he was certain without her he would go mad.

I knew she cared for him too. I hated to see my friends so miserable. Therefore, I had broken my own rule and played cupid for the pair. They had been married for three years. She had accepted him just before we shipped out for the war. She had elicited a solemn vow from him that if she married him he would return to her. Having her secured allowed him to focus on the field. In fact when we returned home it was weeks before I heard from any of my comrades. Still, I worried about them and their love.

Where had love ever gotten me? I had loved my mother and though her departure was not within her control her saying goodbye certainly was. As her time had drawn short she could have sent for me. She should have sent for me. Instead she and Father had holed up together, as they always had. She left without a word to her only living child, and he… Well, he had made it clear that his affection for me was predicated on more than our familial bond. When he had come to his senses and decided that he should prepare me for my life as his successor, it was too late.

Oh, I still felt a residual affection for the old man. I certainly was not willing to allow him to shuffle off this mortal coil before I had a chance to have my say. Still, I was only too aware of the fact that he had abandoned me as certainly as had my mother.

I learned my lessons well and early. I would not make the same mistake twice. I had attempted to dissuade my friends from falling so head over heels with their chosen spouses, but I always kept a watchful eye on them to ensure that should an escape become imminent I would be there to salvage the remnants of the individual left behind.

I watched Ness slumber beside me and realized that we would have to come to some understanding about our marriage. I could not ask her to accept my defection to another lover without presenting her with the option for herself. She was so lovely she would have no insufficiency of offers should she choose to take a lover. Yet the thought of her gracing another man's bed irritated me. What if this imaginary lover treated her poorly? What if he was not gentle? I had a responsibility to see that she was cared for and treated well; after all she was to be my wife.

Carlisle had taught me that a wife was a great responsibility. "She will depend on you for more than her financial needs," he advised. "Women are different from men. They have different sensibilities and require careful handling. When you choose a wife choose one of whom you can be certain, a steady girl. Wives provide you with the greatest treasure that a man will ever possess."

"What treasure is that?" my sixteen year old self asked,

"That of children. Believe me; you will never receive a gift more precious."

Again I looked at my slumbering fiancé and imagined her form swollen with child. I found myself smiling. I had never truly imagined having children. I knew it was expected, but having never found a woman I considered tethering myself to before the thought had seemed a distant thing. Suddenly, looking at the woman I intended to wed I could imagine our offspring. A strapping boy with dark hair like myself; a delicate girl who favoured Ness. I could see her as a mother. She would dote on our offspring, and I would be a father who was present.

Yes, I was determined that my children would not find me lacking in their life. But how could I be present for them and not be there for Ness? How would we reconcile a relationship that broke, to our children? I knew I'd learned what I saw. I knew that my parents loved each other. Would my sons and daughters know if I moved away from a relationship with their mother? And what lesson would that teach them?

I brushed Ness' hair to expose her sweet face to view. How could I not teach my children how precious she was? How could I abandon her to a life of secrecy and deceit? For that would be her bread and butter should she take a lover. She would need to be far more discreet than would I. Men were allowed so many more sins among society than were women. The majority of men I knew kept mistresses. Except, of course, my closest friends. They were all the most faithful of husbands. Edward had learned from his father. Perhaps I should have learned from mine.

My father never even looked at another woman in all my life. Even after my mother died, he had never taken another. Could I be as faithful to Renesmee? Was fidelity such a horrible thought?

She certainly inspired me in the bedroom. In fact I could imagine never tiring of her sweet exploration. She was also so very new to bed play that there were innumerable things to teach her and discover with her. Surely she would not bore me. Could one devote oneself to a spouse alone? Of course it could be done. I witnessed it daily in my friends.

Then again they had all deluded themselves that they were in love. Still, it would hardly be a torture to confine myself to Ness. She was the sort of delight that deserved time and patience to savor.

As I thought about ways I could enjoy her she moved against me and the warmth of her skin aroused my senses once again. A smile graced my face. Yes, that was what I would do. I would be a faithful husband to her, and in turn I would demand fidelity from her. That way I could ensure that she was always treated with consideration and respect.

I kissed her forehead, contented with my decision and settled into the bed beside her. Tomorrow I would tell my father of my choice, and I would tell him of my intentions. That should please him, and set all to rights again.

I did not wake again until the sun was streaming in through the curtains. I stretched, contented to find Ness still cradled in my arms. I rolled over and kissed her thoroughly. She returned the kiss and opened her eyes slowly. Again she was slightly rumpled, but imminently appealing.

"Good morning, beautiful," I said.

Right on cue she blushed crimson. "Good morning handsome."

"I would love to stay here and tupp you 'til we both fell to exhaustion, but alas, I have to visit my father and arrange for you to meet him," I said sighing and kissing her again.

"And I have to face your friends," she sighed.

"Do not concern yourself, Ness. They will adore you."

"I hope so," she said a bit dejectedly.

"What concerns you?"

"I do not know how to make friends and I so want them to approve of me."

"They will. Alice will guide you. Bella is sweet and kind. Rosalie is…" I paused trying to think of the best description for my prickly friend. "Well, she is loyal to a fault. Just remember that she will respect you as long as you do not cow to her."

She gave a look that said she remained concerned, but she did exit the bed and don her dressing gown. I did the same and went to her, taking her in my arms. "I know you will conquer any obstacle you encounter, Sweeting. I have faith in you. Besides, I have made my decision. Nothing and no one will dissuade me from marrying you."

She looked up at me at that statement and beamed. Again I kissed her. Then I stepped back before I drug her back to bed and followed my initial instinct. I sent her to her dressing room and closed the connecting door.

The moment I opened the door to the hallway Bertie was there. He entered and I began my morning ablutions. I told him of my destination for the day and he chose appropriate attire. Father was a stickler for being properly dressed, so Bertie took great care with my ensemble.

In the end I was dressed in a pair of buff trousers and a dark blue tailcoat. The waistcoat was understated done in cream with gold and red accents. The cravat was tied to perfection and my Hessians were polished to a mirror finish. I felt well-armed for battle.

I went down to the breakfast room to find Jasper reading the morning paper. He looked up, folded the paper and took a deep breath. "Jacob, we need to see your father as early as possible."

"Why, what has happened?"

"You made the gossip page." He lifted the paper and read. "It is rumored that a certain gentleman who is considered an extremely eligible bachelor is about to enter the marriage state. Lord B, it is said, has found himself a bride. Hearts are breaking all around London at the news."

I chortled. "Oh, that. I fed the news to the paper. I thought it might spur my father to approve the match more readily. You know how he is about following my supposed exploits in the paper."

Jasper shook his head. "You really need to stop prodding the bull my friend. Sooner or later you will meet the wrong end of his horns."

"And being ordered to wed or lose my inheritance was not the wrong end?"

"Good point."

I took a plate and began to fill it from the sideboard. I was about to sit down when the ladies entered the breakfast room. Jasper and I bowed and the ladies bobbed small curtseys. Jasper walked over to Alice and kissed her sweetly. "Good morning, Love."

"Good morning, my darling," she said in return.

I stepped to Ness and teased her by repeating Jasper's greeting. "Good morning, Love," I said leaning in for a kiss. Ness blushed prettily and turned her cheek into the kiss.

"Good morning," she said softly.

"What, no darling for me?" I said holding her hand to my heart and feigning exaggerated horror. "How soon the bloom is off the rose?"

She tried not to smile, but in a moment she burst with her musical titter. "My apologies, my soon to be lord and master. What term of endearment would satisfy?"

"Oh I think we shall have to explore that thoroughly. Try some out and determine which best suits us, don't you think?" I teased escorting her to a seat at the table. "Allow me to fetch you some breakfast while you contemplate it, Pumpkin."

She made a face at that one. Jasper, Alice and I all laughed heartily at it. "Thank you my gallant."

I dished out a coddled egg, a rasher of bacon and some toast for her and placed the plate before her. "Although I shall strive to be gallant to you, Angel, I fear I shall too often fall short to deserve such a moniker."

"I do not know, you are already spoiling me beyond reason. I could have fetched this," she said, but then to soften the blow she kissed my cheek and said "Thank you, my heart."

I stiffened at the term. It had for an instant after she said it warmed me through, but then I realized how dangerous such a feeling could be. I straightened and retook my seat. That was where the wordplay ended. I was unprepared for the stirrings that she had engendered.

"So," I said attempting to change the subject as rapidly as possible, "We are off to my father's. It is likely to take most of the day. I have sent a note to his man of affairs and we will be discussing business matters as well as our engagement. Is there anything you wish me to tell him, Alice?"

"Yes, inform him that we will be throwing a small dinner party on Sunday in honor of the happy couple and that you plan to announce your intentions there. Inform him that I shall be inviting The Masens, the McCartys, and the Cullens. He is sure to come just for the company."

"I shall tell him."

"Good luck," Alice said to me.

"I'll need it."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

A/N: Well we are about to meet the ladies. I hope you enjoy. By the way, reviews will receive a preview of the next chapter.

NPOV

After the gentlemen left Alice again ordered tradesmen to attend us at the house. A glover and a cobbler arrived and took tracings of my hands and feet. Then measured same and documented their calculations. Alice ordered satin full length gloves for formal occasions, kid gloves for riding and walking, and several other pairs for various occasions she was certain I would attend. The shoes were similarly dealt with having expressed the need for walking boots, riding boots and what seemed like dozens of dancing slippers in various shades.

When the tradesmen departed I turned to her and asked her what I needed to know. "Do I really need so many Alice? I do not wish to bankrupt Jacob all to see me dressed."

"You will hardly manage that task with what we have ordered. Besides, as the wife of a future Duke you will be attending all the best fetes of the season. Surely you realize that you represent him and must appear at your best."

"But Alice, I do not dance. That was not part of my training. Gentlemen hardly ever take their mistresses to official events of the ton," I explained.

"Oh dear," Alice said tutting. "I guess that is something else to which we will need to attend. I wonder if Rosalie would have the name of a good dance master."

As she said it the drawing room door opened and in walked the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She was tall and blonde with an air of sophistication and elegance. She was flanked by an older woman who favored the first in facial features but not in coloring. She had chestnut hair raised in an aristocratic style. On her other side was a beauty with hair the color of rich chocolate. "As a matter of fact I do, why do you require a dance master, Alice?"

"Rose," Alice said rising and welcoming her guests. She greeted each one in turn and bobbed a small curtsey to them. "Bella and Esme how kind of you all to call."

"Nothing could have kept us from coming to meet the woman who has taken down Jacob Black," the beauty called Rosalie said. I was standing aside attempting to be as small as possible. It was a habit I had perfected in my previous life. I could remain in a room without being noticed for ages. It was all a matter of remaining perfectly still and blending into the environment. Rose looked about the room and her eyes alighted upon me in a moment. I swallowed hard as she came toward me eyeing me as though I was a piece of prey and she a hungry predator. "Surely this cannot be she? Why she is so small and unprepossessing."

I was not certain what she meant, but I was more than certain it had been an insult. "I beg your pardon, Ma'am but I believe that Lord Black finds many qualities within me in which he delights. I suppose I am small in comparison to one so statuesque, but I am not so small as to be insignificant, or overlooked. I cannot despair at your assessment, however, because it is Lord Black who has made the choice to bind himself to me for life. I am afraid you must take up your objections to my person with him." I then turned to the other ladies and sketched a curtsey to each.

Alice beamed at me, and in a moment Rosalie burst out in peals of riotous laughter. "Oh, she will suit him perfectly. Introduce us Alice, please."

"Lady Rosalie McCarty allow me to present Miss Renesmee Cherish. Renesmee meet Rosalie."

"Charmed I am sure," I said stiffly.

"Oh come now, you must not take offense, I simply wanted to ensure that you can handle yourself with the mangy dog of a man. He needs handling my dear, as do all men to one degree or another. Please, call me Rose and accept my sincerest apology," she said taking a seat on the settee and patting the seat next to her.

"Poor girl," said the older lady, "you must forgive Rose, I did try to raise her to be a lady, but when it comes to Jacob she has ever failed in the attempt."

Her eyes were so kind and her voice so soft and inviting that I smiled at her. Alice introduced her as Lady Esme Cullen and then introduced the second lady as Lady Bella Masen. Each of us greeted the others and we all took seats around the room.

"Again, I am so very glad that you came. We have much to attend to before the wedding. Ness has had a rather unconventional upbringing and is, therefore, unprepared to be launched into society without some assistance and preparation," Alice said.

Rosalie raised a golden brow. "What do you mean unconventional?"

"Before we discuss this I need you all to swear that not a word of this shall leave the confines of this room."

I felt myself tense when I realized that Alice meant to divulge my true upbringing. Rosalie noticed and turned to face me. "We, of all people know that what is important is not from where one comes, but the place to which one rises. You have my word, Renesmee, that your secrets are safe in my care."

"I concur," Bella chimed in.

"We will take them to our graves," Lady Esme swore.

Alice turned to me and gave me a questioning glance. I knew she would divulge nothing without my consent and trust. I worried my lower lip while I decided if this was wise, and then decided that if Jacob felt so close to these women, and since I trusted him with my life, I would bow to his judgement of their characters. I nodded to Alice and she smiled pleased that I displayed some courage.

"Ness was not raised among the gentry," Alice began.

"There is no shame in that; my own father was in trade. What was your father's profession?" Bella asked kindly.

I took a deep breath and answered. "I honestly do not know. I am an orphan. I never knew either of my parents."

"Oh you poor dear," Lady Esme said reaching her hand out to clasp mine. "Were you raised by relatives?"

"No Ma'am. I was raised by the madam of the most exclusive brothel in all of London." I waited for the inevitable reactions, but they did not come. All four ladies before me simply sat looking at me with anticipation. I continued, after all, the story was mine to tell. "At first, I helped in the kitchen and with the laundry. I was told almost daily that I failed to earn my keep. Mrs. Cope reminded me often that I was to learn from the girls so that when I came of age she could make back the money she had lost on my room and board."

Rosalie reached out and patted my hand. "That does not sound like an easy life."

"I had it better than many. I had a roof over my head and food in my belly," I said honestly, "but it was lonely. The doves saw me as a nuisance; the staff saw me as a distraction, and the customers… Well, they did not see me at all."

"Poor thing," said Bella in sympathetic tones.

"My life was not easy, but nor was it torturous. I managed to stay out of the way for the most part. That is until I met Jacob."

At this point in the story the ladies leaned in. I could tell I had their rapt attention.

"I had seen him before, of course. He tended to visit on a fairly regular basis. I watched him go upstairs with the doves and then descend the stairs when he was finished. He never remained long. I remember hearing the doves sigh over him. He was but a strapping youth. Still the girls spoke of his gentleness and prowess. All of them longed to be his and spoke of snagging him as a protector."

"So they spoke of their gentlemen callers?" Rose asked.

"Oh yes. I probably know more about the gentlemen of the ton than any of you," I laughed.

"I can hardly wait to attend a ball with you by our sides," Rose laughed. "Imagine the things we can learn from this gem of a girl."

"Rose," Bella chided, "She was just getting to the good part."

"Yes, please tell us how you met Jacob, dear," Lady Esme urged.

"Mrs. Cope's is housed in a beautiful mansion. It has several sitting rooms, a formal dining room, and lounges on the main floor. Still the most wonderful room to my mind was always the arboretum. I was ever in the way, so when I was set free I would go there and climb the trees. I was able from that vantage point to observe the comings and goings of the gentlemen and the doves. It was there that I met Jacob."

I told them of our first meeting, and of how he had returned again and again. I explained his kindnesses of getting me music lessons and in conjunction having me taught to read and write. I shared my favorite memories of my youth. All of them revolved around Jacob. They laughed and listened. They even inserted their own memories of him in his youth.

"I wonder if you noticed how Jacob changed as the years passed. You speak of him so differently than I have seen him over the years," Bella explained. "I have ever thought him a good man, but I have seen his attempts to harden himself to the world."

"Well, you must remember I saw him but rarely over the last four years," I admitted. "And then only when he seemed troubled."

"Troubled?" Esme asked.

"Well, before he went off to war he came to see me. He was thinner then I had seen him, and paler. He paced about rambling about how he was afraid that none of his decisions were what they should have been."

"I remember how torn he was about following our men to war. He and his father had a terrible row over it," Alice explained.

"We were of no help, either. We were all so focused on his going to protect them that I fear we never thought about how it affected him," Bella confessed.

"I know that he and Carlisle spoke as well, and that he left more confused than he had arrived," Lady Esme said shaking her head.

"What did you tell him, Ness that clarified things for him?" Rosalie asked.

"I told him that he could only live his life as he saw fit. I told him that all I knew of him was goodness. I told him what a profound effect he had had on my life. I told him that he would be remembered always as someone who did good. Then he left me. He sent a package that contained a small volume of poetry and a three word note."

"What did it say?" asked Alice.

"Please remember me," I said closing my eyes against the pain those three words still engendered.

"How romantic," Bella sighed.

I opened my eyes and looked at her quizzically. "Romantic?"

"Jacob went off to war almost certain that he would not return. We had coerced a promise from him that he would see our men returned safely to us. He swore that he would sacrifice himself before he saw them hurt," Alice explained. "Jasper says that more than once it was Jacob who moved them from harm's way. He said that he told them all that his life was unimportant as long as he could provide happiness to his friends."

"Noble fool," Rosalie breathed.

"Jacob has ever thought himself inconsequential in the lives of those who love him," Lady Esme said sadly.

"I cannot believe that," I said, "I know that he feels so about his father, but that is because he has never seemed to acquire his father's approval."

All three of the ladies sighed. Then Lady Esme took a deep breath and looked me right in the eye. "Renesmee, I am going to give you the advice I have given each of my daughters." She looked to Rosalie, Alice, and Bella in turn. "I only gave birth to one, but Alice and Bella are as much my daughters as if we were related by blood."

I smiled and nodded my understanding.

"A wife's duty is to love her husband. It is easy to love them when they are thinking, but they are male, and as such there will come a time when they are thoughtless and careless in their behavior or in their words. It is inevitable. What I charge you to do is remember to love him when he is not the man you think you know."

"I have known him for almost twelve years. I am certain that he could not behave as you describe," I defended him.

"I am not disparaging Jacob, my dear, I swear. I am only trying to prepare you for the inevitable moment when he will disappoint you, or worse hurt you by some careless act. He will not mean it. He will more than likely berate himself for it when it is over, but he will do it."

I was confused. I knew that Esme cared for Jacob as if he were her own. Why would she say such things?

"Ness," Alice said, "surely you know that Jacob is no saint. You should know that better than anyone. After all, you met him in circumstances that were less than ideal."

"Still, he was always generous with the doves. He never encouraged them to believe he felt anything more for them than the passion of a moment. He was more truthful than most of the men who visited the house," I told them.

"You told us that you followed his exploits in the scandal sheets, Ness. You know that he can be rash and impetuous," Bella interjected.

"We know how good Jacob has been to you, to us all. Still, we know that he is a man. You have not yet met our husbands. When you do I am certain you will see that they are fine upstanding gentlemen, all. But you must believe me when I tell you that even they have failed each of us a time or two," Rosalie elucidated.

"Again all I ask is that you remember to love him through it. That and know you are never alone. You are joining our little family by wedding Jacob. If ever you need support or a sympathetic ear you need only ask and it shall be given you." Esme squeezed my hand in hers and smiled.

I was overwhelmed. I had never had a family. I had dreamed of being cared for in this way, but never truly thought I would ever know how it truly felt. Once again Jacob had provided me with something I never thought could be mine. I appreciated the advice my new family gave so kindly, but I was certain that Jacob was above the things they feared he would do. My Jacob would never hurt me, and I would never hurt him.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

JPOV

Jasper and I headed out to face my father. The London house was grand by any standards and I had resided there only two weeks before I returned to my bachelor rooms, prior to that we had been at Wolf's Bridge, our country estate.

I did not mind the country house as much. The time I spent there was mostly without my parents. The London house on the other hand reeked with memories of an idyllic time of my youth. There were rooms there that my father and I never entered. Places that were her domain. I felt her absence so much more there that I did anywhere else. When father had insisted we return to London so that I could begin my bride search I had departed the house as soon as possible.

Jasper had the good grace to remain silent as we made the relatively short trek to Father's London residence. When we arrived he turned to me and said "You are not alone." It was our pledge as we went into battle. That no matter the outcome we were brothers in arms and always had the other's back.

"Thank you, Jazz."

We entered the house and were ushered into my father's study. Preston, his butler, led us in and then closed the door behind us as we took our seats. "How is he, Preston?" I enquired. Preston had always been a trust worthy and loyal servant. He and I had made arrangements to see that I was kept abreast of my father's health and needs during his recovery.

"He is a bit stronger, my lord. His appetite has been good, and Lord Cullen has encouraged a bit of exercise. I have arranged for him to take short walks in Hyde Park with his valet."

"I assume he goes during the unfashionable hour," I said knowing my father's distaste of appearing weak.

"Yes, sir. Still, he has gone two days in a row without prolonged complaint."

"Thank you, Preston. We are expecting Mr. Cheny. Please inform my father of our arrival, and again, thank you."

Jasper took a seat upon the leather sofa and I walked to the French doors to look out upon the back garden. It looked a bit bleak, it being November. I remembered the hours my mother spent on seeing it made colourful and welcoming. Seeing it beneath the slumber of autumn made it seem as if it would never bloom again. Damn I hated being in this house.

I heard the door open and turned to see my father enter utilizing a cane and looking thinner and frailer than I had ever seen him in my life. Truth be told I could see the improvements that Preston had reported. His color was better and had lost the pall he had upon my return from the war. His walk was hesitant, but still he walked tall.

I sketched a bow, as did Jasper once he gained his feet. Father did the same and then made his way to a wing-backed chair to take a seat. His eyes never left me. The black orbs scrutinized me as they always had. I was certain he searched for my very soul with that gaze, and he always found it lacking.

"Father," I greeted him.

"Son," he replied. "May I assume that this visit is to refute the bit in the scandal sheets?"

"Actually, I am here to inform you of its veracity."

I watched his brow raise and took a seat before him waiting for the inquisition to begin. "That is…" I watched him search for the word. He had displayed this difficulty since the seizure. According to Lord Cullen it was not unusual, and patience was required in waiting for him to express himself. Carlisle told me that allowing him to take the time he needed would lessen the pressure and frustration he was bound to feel. "That is unexpected," he finally verbalized.

"I am sorry to disappoint you by meeting the terms of your challenge. It seems that Sam will not be duke after all," I said petulantly. It irked me that my own father bet against me. I began to think that he truly wished to give it all to my cousin and see me with nothing. How had we come to this?

"I am far from disappointed, I am simply surprised. When you left here I was certain you had no intention of complying. Who is the girl?"

"No one you know," I bit out in retort. It made my blood boil to know he had so little faith in me.

"What Jacob means is…" Jasper interrupted trying to diffuse the hostility I was conveying, "She has led a very sheltered life. She has never had a season, and has not been out in society."

My father's brow furrowed. "Then where is it you met her?" he said still looking at me.

I eyed him realizing that if I wanted to make him believe me I could not approach this as Alice had suggested. I knew he would see through my telling him a tale that was rehearsed and prepared. I took a bracing breath and plunged in head first.

"You wouldn't believe me," I uttered sharply.

I saw him bristle at my tone. "Who are her parents that they have not had her in society? What sort of girl is that sheltered in London?"

"The sort I intend to marry," I said defiantly.

"Renesmee is an orphan, your grace," Jasper interjected. "She was raised by the nuns at St. Ann's."

"And this convent raised child agreed to marry you?" Father asked incredulously. "How much did it cost you? The nuns must have been desperate to rid themselves of her if they sold her to you."

"I did in fact make a donation to the convent, but that was not why Ness accepted my suit," I said defensively.

"No? Then she is mercenary all on her own?"

That did it. He could disparage me all he liked, but not Ness. "I have come to inform you of my impending nuptials. You may attend and welcome my bride into this family or you may choose not to attend and disinherit me. At this point it matters little to me, either way. However, I will not hear a single word spoken against my intended, not now, nor after she is my wife. She will be respected at all times, Sir, or we will never set foot beneath your roof. She is everything good and sweet and I will have her honored. Is that perfectly clear?"

My father looked at me, his eyes thinning. He seemed to search my face for something. I knew not what. Then he smiled just a bit. "As you wish. Now, will you tell me about this young lady with the unusual name?"

I breathed a sigh of relief and caught a smile on Jasper's face. Now Papa would listen to me with less judgment and a more open mind.

"Here name is Renesmee Cherish. Although her sir name was a gift from the nuns. No one knows her parentage. Still, she is refined and charming," Jasper offered.

"How did you meet her, son?"

"I have known her since she was a child."

"How old is she?" Father asked.

"She turned eighteen two months ago."

"Then how long have you known her?"

"We first met when she was but six years of age. She was a scamp, and often flew from the cage of the duties of convent life. I learned this when I returned her to the nuns after rescuing her from a tree. She was so small and I saw no one near, so I insisted on returning her back where she belonged. She confessed that she was a fugitive from behind the wall. When I returned her to Mother Superior I was regaled with her many misdeeds as viewed from her keepers perspective." I remembered the gist of the story Alice had concocted and simply enhanced the story with as much truth as I could.

"The poor thing had no children for company and was expected to follow the rules of the convent. Her education was meant to transition her into a novitiate and eventually into taking orders. I pleaded with the Mother Superior to accept a tutor for the child. It took some persuading, but eventually she allowed it. Ness was taught by the finest music master in all of London, and she learned well."

"You provided this for her?" my sire asked obviously intrigued.

"Yes, sir. I saw to it that she was raised to be able to live in the real world should she so desire. I paid for it all, and saw to it that she would have a choice," I said with pride.

"And you kept in touch with the child?"

"I did. More so when I was younger, but I saw her when I could. I took her to her first museum. I took her for her first ice. She had many firsts with me," I stifled the inner happiness I felt at the most recent first we had shared. "She was even the last person I saw before we left for the war."

Again my father's brow rose in surprise. I even saw Jasper register astonishment. "So you followed her progress from the first?" Papa asked.

"Yes, but I must be honest with you, Father, I had no plans then of asking for her hand. In my mind she was still a child. I should thank you, Papa. Your ultimatum caused me to feel the need for a wife and it was the impetus for me to see to Nessie's future as well."

"What made you do that?"

"I knew that should my income be cut I had to see to it that she was provided the opportunity to choose another life." It was the truth. I wanted her free of the life she had known. "Then I saw her. She had always been a pretty child, but now…"

"Now?" my father prompted.

"She has become the handsomest woman of my acquaintance. No, that is not right. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen." It was true. She was formed perfectly. There was not a thing I would change.

"Was it her beauty that caused you to decide upon her for your future mate?"

I thought about that for a moment. It was true her attraction and allure was undeniable, but that was not what had made me think to marry her. Nor was it the reason I intended to honor my vows. "Actually, it was the fact that I enjoy her company. What I dreaded most about the prospect of matrimony was being shackled to a woman with whom I could not converse without wanting to kill myself. I feared that marriage would bring none of the parties involved any happiness.

With Renesmee I do not have that fear. We have ever been friends. She delights and inspires me. For the first time I imagine marriage as something I can settle into without misery."

My father sighed. "When can I meet her?"

"Alice thought to host a dinner party on Sunday, your grace. The girl is in our care until the wedding. Alice and I have taken to her, and wished to provide her a home from witch to marry. We have invited the Masens, the McCartys, and the Cullens. Alice thought that in that setting all parties could be a bit more at ease," Jasper informed him.

"If you have the banns read this Sunday you can marry next month," my progenitor said decisively.

"We shall be married in a fortnight, sir. I obtained a special license yesterday. It will be a quiet affair. I do not want Ness to be overwhelmed. Since the season does not begin until after the holidays it will give us time to prepare her for the paramount alteration to her lifestyle. Alice has agreed to assist in her introduction to society, and I hoped you would do the same."

"We shall see, Jacob. We shall see."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

NPOV

The afternoon passed more pleasantly than I could have imagined. I found Jacob's female friends open and charming. They treated me as one of their own and for the first time in my life I enjoyed conversation with other women.

Having never had friends among the doves made for a rather isolated life. It was not that the doves were unkind to me. It was simply that they were either working or resting. When they did gather to talk, it generally revolved around the gentlemen who frequented the establishment. What this one enjoyed. What that one would ask for. I had nothing to contribute to such conversations so I simply did not engage.

Occasionally, I spoke to the book seller's daughter, who would sneak the scandal sheets into the books I borrowed. Her name was Rene and I think we could have been friends, but her mama did not approve of her befriending a girl from 'that house' so we only exchanged pleasantries.

Bella, as it turned out, was a connoisseur of novels and we had read many of the same books. We discussed our favorite authors and our favorite plots. I was amazed, I had never had the pleasure of talking over a favorite book with anyone but Jacob, and in truth we had not done so for years. I liked it.

Rosalie was a dichotomy of regal beauty and saucy humour. She teased her compatriots at every turn, even her mother. Yet there was not a single instance of incivility or unkindness in either her tone or subject. She laughed at herself even more than she laughed at others and the effect was one of frivolity and intimacy of friendship. I liked her very much, and was certain that seeing her behave so with Jacob would prove very amusing.

Lady Esme was everything I imagined a lady to be. She was gentle as well as genteel. Her voice was warm and sweet and she spoke to me in a way that eased me into discovery. She urged me to ask questions and treated each answer as a means to bestow kindness as well as knowledge.

There was something about her that made me yearn for the affection of a parent that I had never known. She seemed the epitome of motherhood, and she treated each of us as if we were her very own children. My heart ached at the thought of having missed a relationship with a mother. If mothers were like Esme then no child should be deprived of one.

Sometime after luncheon, while we were sharing conversation and anecdotes about Jacob there was a soft knock on the door. The butler entered with a silver salver. Alice reached for the note upon it when the man spoke up. "My apologies, my lady, but the missive is for Miss Cherish."

I was confused. I knew no one who would write me. In fact, no one whom I had known knew where I was. Still, Alice handed the note over with a curious look in her eye.

It had my name and the directions to the house on it. I turned it over and saw the heavy wax seal upon it. It was a silhouette of a wolf howling at the moon. I knew this symbol; it was on Jacob's signet ring.

I broke the seal at once expecting some news from my intended, but that was not what I found. Instead what I found took me aback. I handed it to Alice and she read it aloud.

"_Miss Cherish,_

_ I know we have not yet been formally introduced, but my son has informed me of your impending nuptials. _

_ I would like to meet with you prior to Sunday's planned event. Having Jacob there might prevent us from speaking as freely as I would like. As I am sure you can guess I have a few questions for you. _

_ Do you think you could get away tomorrow and meet me? This would have to be kept a secret from Jacob, of course. If you care at all for my son, you will agree._

_ Yours,_

_ William Black, Duke of La Push" _Alice read to a roomsilent in rapt attention. Moments passed as each of us absorbed the missive.

Lady Esme was the first to speak. "Well, we shall have to find a task for Jacob that will occupy him long enough for Renesmee and me to visit the duke without risk of discovery. Have you made arrangements for the wedding and the wedding breakfast, Alice?"

"Not yet, no. I wanted Jacob to speak to his grace before we began, but that is a brilliant idea Esme. Surely such an errand will take all afternoon. If Rosalie and Bella will assist, I believe we can stretch it into the early evening. By that time we will all be preparing to attend our planned party. If we play it right we can carry on this intrigue without any danger of discovery," Alice enthused.

"Oh I can definitely distract him." Rose laughed. "I imagine we can layer arrangements for a church, a minister, flowers, and transportation. Envision the folly of confusing him with what flowers to choose," she giggled, "he has no hope of escape."

"We will also have to take him to buy a ring for our lovely friend as well. A girl cannot marry a future duke without a ring to make her the envy of all who see her," Bella added.

"Splendid, then we are agreed?" Esme asked.

"So you think I should attend the duke?" I asked. "I cannot say I like the idea of going behind Jacob's back this way. Besides, I have no idea what to say to a duke." The more I thought about it the less at ease I became.

"Renesmee, you will not be alone. I shall accompany you. After all, no proper convent raised lady would dream of meeting alone with a gentleman, no matter his age. I will ensure that Sir William behaves, as well as that you come off as the most perfect match for his son he has ever seen," Esme said smiling her beatific smile. "Come, my dear, let us draft a response that will set the tone for our visit tomorrow."

Together the ladies dictated the exact wording, and after three tries I sealed these words and sent them off to Jacob's father.

_Your Grace,_

_ I cannot express my surprise at receiving your note. I was under the impression that your son would be spending the day in your company. I would think that he could answer any questions about our engagement that should arise. However, it is not inconceivable to me that being presented with it as a fate acompli might be disconcerting to a father. _

_If meeting me privately would ease your discomfort in any way, I would be delighted to meet you on the morrow, although I feel a bit uncomfortable doing so in a setting other than the one your son arranged. Still, I can see that being informed of your son's impending nuptials having never set eyes upon the bride might be alarming. I do not plan to circumvent my future husband's desires during our life together, but to ease your apprehensions I shall do it, just this once._

_I am meant to go hat shopping tomorrow with Lady Cullen. This will provide an opportunity to steal away and meet with you. Of course I will bring Lady Cullen as a chaperone. I understand that the two of you are well acquainted, so I cannot see that as an impediment to our meeting. She has sworn to keep my confidences, so I am assured of her discretion in this matter._

_I look forward to easing any concerns you may have. Expect us at one, and have no fear, your grace, I am as anxious to meet you as you appear to be to meet me._

_Your Servant,_

_ Miss Renesmee Cherish_

Once that was complete the ladies made to depart. Bella leaned in close and whispered "I am so very glad that Jacob has chosen so well."

Next Rosalie took my hands and said bracingly "You are exactly what that boy has always needed. He doesn't deserve you, but not to worry, we shall mold him into the kind of husband you deserve, my dear."

At last, Lady Esme pulled me into a warm embrace. "Have no fear, sweet child; tomorrow we will begin to win over the duke, and perhaps to achieve reconciliation between a father and son."

Alice suggested that I take a lie down before changing for dinner. As Jane helped me take off the dress I wore and wrapped me in a dressing gown I realized how weary I had grown. I had truly enjoyed the time spent with the ladies, but my nerves over meeting them, coupled with my anxiety about tomorrow had left me exhausted. I curled up on the bed and closed my eyes praying that I would manage to prevail.

Sometime later, when the light from the windows was more like the color of Mrs. Cope's sitting room. I put my arms above my head and stretched like a contented kitten. I raised myself into a seated position and heard a soft chuckle from nearby.

I turned to the sitting area before the hearth and saw him sitting in a chair shaking his head. "Do not move. This day has been interminably long and frustrating. I returned here feeling certain that nothing and no one could possibly cheer me. Yet here you are, the epitome of contentment, yourself. I have been watching you sleep, thinking that I had never seen anything so mesmerizing, but it appears I was mistaken. Seeing you rise, looking slightly drowsy and rumpled to perfection… When, Little Bird, did you become so incredibly beautiful?"

I felt the blush rise at his words. Before I knew it he was beside me weaving his hands through my hair and kissing my neck. "Thank you," he said between kisses.

"For what?"

"For reminding me that no matter how insane my sire can make me," he kissed up to my chin and then paused before me, looking at my lips, "there is no way I would give you up. Not now that I have tasted the honey of your kiss."

With that he pressed his lips to mine and kissed me sweetly. I opened to his gentle probing and our tongues danced a languid pas de deux. His arms snaked about me, drawing me closer. I clung to him, drinking in his spicy aroma, and incredible warmth. He stretched out beside me and cradled me in his embrace.

"Would you mind terribly if we cried off supper and remained here?" he asked me.

"No, if that is what you wish."

"All I want is to stay here with you in my arms," he sighed.

"Was the visit with your father so awful?"

"Not in the sense that you might think. There was no exchange of fierce words. No discernible rows. We are nothing if not polite. Still he hooks me with his barbs. 'This little nun of yours,' he says 'do you think she is prepared for the role she will be called upon to play as a duchess?' 'Will she know how to carry herself?' 'Will she be up to the task of intermediary between you and the tenants?' 'Will she be able to navigate the sea of the ton?' On and on, and on he went as the day progressed. Mr. Cheney came with good news about the home farms and their progress, but all father seemed interested in was the fact that I had yet to go personally to visit them. It is maddening."

I raised my palm and placed it on his chest. "He may have a point, where I am concerned, not you, of course. I am not accustomed to playing the lady. I have no idea what my duties might be. Still, I shall endeavor to be the best duchess he has ever seen. I will be a credit to you, I swear."

"I never doubted it," he said laying a gentle kiss on my forehead.

"Since I am to meet your father shortly, how would you advise me?"

"You need not concern yourself. I will be there to protect you," he assured me.

I sat up and faced him. "I do not require protection. I require information. I have never been one to run from a challenge. Surely you remember that much about me?"

He smiled fondly at me, but then cupped my cheek in his palm. "As your future husband it is my duty to protect you."

I raised a brow in disbelief. "I have defended myself most of my life. I managed well enough, I think."

He had the audacity to laugh at me. I furrowed my brow and attempted to glare. "What are you laughing about?" I said accusingly.

"Ness, I have been your protector from the time I first made your acquaintance. I paid a small stipend to Mrs. Cope to see to it that no harm came to you."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "Oh, you foolish man."

"Not at all, I could not leave you without providing for your comfort."

He looked so earnest that I hated to disillusion him, but he needed to know that I was not without resources of my own. "It was very sweet of you to try."

"What do you mean try?"

"Jacob, your presence provided me with a modicum of protection when I was a child, it is true, but as I grew you came less and less often to the house. Mrs. Cope might have enjoyed the money while you were a frequent guest within her walls and I am sure you saved me a great deal of distress by providing it… But as you found yourself in less need of the doves…" It was hard for me to talk about the times he was away. In the end I looked away as a tear slid down my cheek.

He lifted my chin with his finger and waited until I raised my eyes before he spoke. "Was it awful?"

"Not always. Punishments were simply part of my days. If the missus felt I was not meeting her expectations she would cuff me. She was not able to find my books after that first time, I hid them well. Still, it was the doves who were often the danger."

"The doves?"

"Yes, most especially Lauren, she said that it was my fault that you turned from her. She always found a way to trip, or hit me."

"Did this happen after I went to war?" I shook my head. He looked thoughtful. "That day after I had taken you to the museum, you had a black eye. You told me you had fallen from the tree. My God, Ness, why didn't you tell me?"

"What could you have done?"

"Something… Anything…"

"I survived. And now I am on the brink of marriage to a future duke. The only obstacle I face is his father. So tell me what I need to know."

That night we spoke about his father, about my life in the house, and about the life he planned for us. At some point he decided to show me how wonderful that life could be by taking me in his arms and bringing me pleasure beyond imagining. I swore to myself that I would make him proud. I would win over his father.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

NPOV

I awoke to the coral light of dawn as it inched its way across the floor and up onto the bed. I sat still watching the light caress Jacob's back. The chorded muscles of his back were well defined and looked as well sculpted as any of the statues I had seen in the hall of marbles. My hands itched to touch him, and I gave in to the temptation. I figured that reminding myself just why I had to win over his father would assist me in the attempt.

I smoothed my hands over his shoulders. My hands looked so pale next to his bronzed skin. I allowed my fingers to knead from the point of muscle insertion to the point of attachment. I used firm pressure and felt the muscles dance beneath my fingers. As I massaged his shoulders I felt them relax and become malleable in my hands. I also heard a soft moan escape his lips. I smiled at having won that sound.

As I moved my hands down his spine and fanned them out across his ribs I was granted another contented sound and I began to feel powerful. I leaned over him as my hands roamed lower. As my hands fondled the curve of his hips I kissed the nape of his neck. My hair pooled over his back and as I lifted my head to kiss lower it brushed across his skin and he arched back toward the touch.

"Holy mother of God, Ness," he sighed.

I sat up; afraid I had either hurt or annoyed him.

"Don't stop," he pleaded.

I returned to where I had just abandoned him and began my ministrations anew. "You like this?" I asked.

"More than like it. Your fingers are so warm, your lips so sweet, and your hair so silky. It is a feast of sensation."

I continued the assault upon his senses until he flipped over taking me in his arms and kissing me senseless. Our lips met in a hurried assault as we both sought closeness. He plundered my mouth with his tongue and I clung to him as I drank in his taste. In an instant he had parted my dressing gown and exposed the shift beneath. His hands cupped my bosom beneath in the same way I had caressed his back. I rose up to meet his palms and my nipples pebbled beneath his touch.

After a few moments of this he seemed to become frustrated with the material between us and fisted the garment on either side tearing it from my body in a single tug. The coolness of the morning air stung my skin and the turgid peaks of my breasts tightened further.

Jacob took one bud into his warm mouth and laved it with his tongue enflaming me even further. His huge hand engulfed my other breast and its warmth eased the initial chill I had felt. I lay there exposed from neck to toes. I wanted him so badly I began to tug at his fall hoping to free him to take me.

I was trembling so that my fingers could not work the buttons. I cradled him in my hand and made a frustrated sound. In an instant Jacob was off the bed and shedding his clothes. Once his magnificence was released he returned to me and positioned himself between my thighs. He moved his staff against my core and gathered the moisture there.

"Good God, Ness," he said through gritted teeth, "you are always so ready for me."

"If you know me to be ready, then I beg you, do not make me wait." I answered lifting my hips to encourage him.

"As you wish," he said and then seated himself within my sheath to the hilt. I let loose a guttural cry at the ecstasy I felt and it spurred him to move. We were both wound so tightly that his movements were fast and furious and exactly what I needed them to be. We both touched and kissed as if without that connection we could not breathe. At last we both tumbled over the cliff. I felt my inner walls massage his length only a moment before I felt him spill his seed deep within me. Then we both collapsed into a panting mass of limbs and lips.

After our breathing began to return to a reasonable rate Jacob rolled us both over so I was draped across him. I pressed my cheek to his chest and listened to the steady thud of his heart. Mine beat in time and with each beat it sang of my love for this man.

"I could get used to mornings like this," he said in his deep rumbling voice.

"As could I."

"You are a wonder, Little Bird."

Sometime after ten, Jacob gently woke me with a kiss. When I opened my eyes I saw that he was partially dressed with his trousers and shirt on. The neck cloth was untied and there was stubble upon his cheek. I smiled at him and he returned the gesture.

"Good day my sweet," he said sitting upon the bed. "I hate to wake such a sleeping beauty, but I feel obligated to see you fed after all our sport, and Alice would skin me should I attend breakfast without you." He kissed the back of each hand. "Come and get yourself dressed and such and then knock on the door and I shall accompany you down. It should take Bertie about that long to see to my scruff and my clothes."

I made to leave the bed, but he stopped me and hitched the sheet above my breasts. "Take that with you, or we will never make it out of this room, and we both have things to accomplish elsewhere."

Jane dressed me in a peach dress with a sprigged muslin skirt. She dressed my hair into an impossible series of twists and curls until it looked like a copper halo about my face. I smiled at her and she beamed with pleasure. "I shall inform Lady Whitlock that she has given me a gem. If you would like, I shall ask Lord Black to employ you as my personal maid."

Jane hopped up and down and squealed in delight. Then she seemed to come back to herself, stood straight and calmly said "It would be my pleasure to serve you, my lady."

"Oh, Jane, I am not a lady yet. But I feel that you have prepared me well to take the next step in that aim."

I had Jane knock on Jacob's door and he came to the outer door of the dressing chamber to fetch me. We walked into the breakfast room together and I saw the glint of Alice's eye. Again Jacob sat me at the table and filled a plate for me before filling one for himself and taking a seat opposite me.

"So," Alice began "the girls and I have decided that wedding plans need to be put into action. We have arranged several meetings for you today, Jacob. I am certain that presenting things to your father as a fait accompli is the best approach. Besides, we all have ideas to make this affair superb."

Jacob's face looked leery. "I was actually hoping to spend the day with Renesmee. Seeing my father took all day yesterday, and tomorrow evening is your dinner party, so I am certain that you will take up much of the day preparing Ness for the event."

Alice shot me a look and I swallowed hard remembering my role in this diversion. "Oh, Jacob, I wish you had told me that. Lady Esme offered to take up the task of seeing me fitted with the requisite chapeaux."

Alice giggled and said "Je ne doute pas que vous allez faire magnifiquement dans votre quête"

"Je vais essayer d'être victorieux," I answered her.

Jacob held his cup halfway to his lips and stared open mouthed at me. "When did you learn French?"

"Monsieur Alistair taught me. He said that to sing some of the most beautiful songs I would need a working knowledge of the romance languages. I can speak a little Italian as well," I said proudly. Monsieur Alistair had always complemented me on my ear for languages.

Jacob shook his head replacing his cup upon its saucer. "You never cease to amaze, do you Little Bird?"

I smiled at him "Votre petit oiseau s'efforce de vous Impresse."

"I shall hold you to that," he said. Then he turned to Alice and sighed. "Very well, I guess I am at your disposal."

Lady Esme arrived at eleven and I donned my pelisse and a pair of gloves for the outing. We rode out to Esme's favorite milliner. Madame Renata was a lithe and tall woman. She was sophisticated with a shock of gray at the front of her hair. She plied her trade much as the other clothiers had done measuring my head and face. Then she presented sketches for Esme and my approval. I demurred to Esme's taste and in little over an hour we had paced our order and were on our way to meet my prospective father-in-law.

"The most important thing for you to remember, my dear, is that Sir William is a man, like any other. He will attempt to bluster and bully. Refuse to be cowed by him and he will be forced to listen. And remember I will be right by your side."

We descended the steps of the coach and the coachman knocked upon the door for us. It was opened by a straight backed servant whom Esme called Preston. "My Lady, his grace is expecting you."

We were led down a long hallway and shown into a richly appointed sitting room. It was done in rich earth tones, with sepia paneled walls and cinnamon covered furniture. There was a wall of French doors that overlooked a neglected garden. It made me sad to see it. Seated in front of those doors, looking out, was a man.

His hair was the same inky black as Jacob's with only a few strands of white highlighting it. Preston announced us and in a slow move the gentleman rose and turned to face us. He bobbed his head by way of a bow and slowly, haltingly stepped forward. "Esme, my dear, you get more beautiful every time I see you."

Esme curtseyed slightly and turned to me. "Renesmee, allow me to introduce Sir William Black, the most expert flatterer in all of London. Sir William, may I present Miss Renesmee Cherish."

"Now, now Esme, you will teach the girl to believe nothing I say, and we cannot have that, can we?" he said showing us to the settee and taking a seat himself.

I sat very straight so as not to appear small and insignificant, but Sir William was an imposing figure and I felt so nervous. I remembered how still I stood when gentlemen inspected me for the auction and attempted to imitate that. I would not fidget and let him see my discomfort.

"Well," he began, "I can certainly see why my son has chosen you as a prospective bride. You are certainly lovely."

"Thank you, your grace."

"Jacob tells me that you have been acquainted for some time," he prompted.

"Yes, sir."

His eyes scanned my face as if trying to size me up. "I hear that you were raised in a religious order."

"Yes, sir," I answered again. He shifted uncomfortably and I decided that this was getting us nowhere. "If your grace will forgive me, I believe that we should be blunt with each other. I wish to marry your son and you wish that I wouldn't."

He started at my boldness. I was certain that he had not expected it. He paused as if regrouping for an argument, but I thought to head him off.

"I understand that you have reservations about Jacob marrying someone with whom you are so little acquainted. It must seem very strange to you. I know it feels strange to me. Please allow me to assure you that I have no designs on Jacob's fortune, nor his title. I have lived a singularly simple life and have no desire to raise my status, believe me. My only wish in all of this is to marry your son and be the best wife I can be for him."

"That is all well and good, young lady, but in marrying him you would not only be his wife, you would be his duchess. Are you prepared for such a life?" He asked pointedly.

"No, sir, not at all."

My honesty seemed to take away some of his steam. "Then what makes you think that you are qualified to be his wife?"

I smiled slightly. "I have the only qualification that should matter, your grace."

"And what is that?"

"Jacob chose me."

Sir William blinked at me. Apparently that was not what he had expected by way of an answer.

"You charged him with finding and securing a wife in a month's time. He has fulfilled that edict. He has chosen me. Now unless you mean to disinherit him despite your attempt to have him do your bidding, then I suppose that nothing I can say will sway you. But, if you mean to have your son married and fulfilling his duties then I do not see what else there is to say on the matter."

"You are a cheeky little minx, I'll give you that."

"I simply answered you question, sir. Now was there something else you needed to know?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is. You said that you had no need of his money or title."

"That is right."

"Then what is it you need from Jacob?"

I paused. I had not thought about that. Just having him in my life again had been so amazing. Days in his company were extraordinary and nights in his bed were heavenly. There was nothing I needed from him more than that. Was there?

"I need him, I always have."

"Why?" Sir William asked pointedly.

Why did I need him? "Because Jacob is the person who taught me about love, your grace. I was a lonely child, always in the way, always under foot. Not a day passed that I was not told what a burden I was. Jacob was the first person to treat me as if I mattered, the only person to show true kindness to a girl who had no one. He saw to it that I was educated and made fit for a life beyond the walls of the world I knew. He spent time with me, showed me wonders. He opened my eyes to the idea that love existed. He taught me that it wasn't only something found in books. He made me believe that it was something I could have. Without him I would have led a much different life. Why do I need him? Because I love him, sir. I always have, and I always will."

Sir William smiled at me and reached a hand to cover mine. "That is all I needed to know. All I have ever wanted for him was to know love like I knew with his mother. He deserves a taste of the happiness she and I had."

"Have you ever thought to tell him that?"

"He wouldn't believe me," he lamented. "One more question, my dear. Have you told Jacob how you feel?"

I thought about that. I had never actually said the words. Still, he must know. It must be obvious, mustn't it? "Well… no, I suppose not."

"Then take my advice, if you would, and don't, at least not yet."

"Why would you say that?"

It was Esme who answered. "Jacob has some very strange ideas about love, dear. He never got over the loss of his mother and he believes that to love someone means risking them leaving you."

"My son is a fool," Sir William said.

"Perhaps, but as Ness says, he chose her."

"I saw him yesterday when he spoke of her," Sir William said thoughtfully. "He cares a great deal for you, my dear. Give him time. He will come to understand things in time. I am certain of it."

.

*French translations:

Alice: Je ne doute pas que vous allez faire magnifiquement dans votre quête - "I have no doubt that you will do beautifully in your quest."

Ness: "Je vais essayer d'être victorieux," - "I shall try to end victorious"

"Votre petit oiseau s'efforce de vous Impresse."– "Your little bird strives to impress you."


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

JPOV

Alice, Bella and Rosalie had dragged me hither, thither, and yon. We had booked the chapel at Christ's Church along with their vicar for two Sundays hence. The man had the gall to eye me in a manner that seemed to assume that my intended was in a delicate condition, and that was why I required such a speedy ceremony. It was Rosalie who managed to set him straight.

"You have never seen two people so incredibly in love. I think if we could not arrange these nuptials in the time frame that Jacob would skip off to Gretna Green and rob us all of the sanctity this occasion deserves."

The cleric humphed and cleared his throat. "Really?"

"And that simply wouldn't do, especially if you knew our sweet Renesmee. She is a paragon of purity and good breeding. Thank God we were here, she has no parents, you see. We insisted that she be married well and proper, and now you shall be responsible for seeing it is done right," Rosalie said placing a hand upon the arm of the vicar and making even the holy man her devoted pawn.

When we departed the church rectory I shook my head at my beautiful friend. "Not that I do not appreciate the result, but is it truly fair for you to ensnare the heart of a poor clergyman?"

"My dear Jacob, even ministers start out their lives as men. He needed to be dealt with, and I refuse to have him gossiping that Renesmee is increasing. Now he will repeat only what he heard about her virtue and goodness."

At that I bowed over Rose's hand and kissed it. "Thank you."

"I did it for your future wife, pup. She deserves to enter society without blemish. After all, speculation will be rampant due to her snagging you from beneath the noses of all those scheming debutantes and their mamas."

From the church we made our way to Covent Garden. Bella had favorites among the vendors and was certain she could arrange for flowers for the chapel and for my bride. "What kinds of blooms does Renesmee like?" she asked me.

I was at a loss. "She liked the blush rose I gave her the other day," I offered.

"Well that is a start," Bella said.

Rosalie laughed. "What a pathetic paramour you are, Jacob."

"I beg your pardon?"

"What did you do when you had mistresses? However did you purchase presents for them if you didn't bother to learn their preferences?"

I grumbled something about them always seeming grateful for my offerings, but it sounded insufficient even to my own ears. All three of my friends shook their heads sadly at me and we went about ordering flowers. That took a surprisingly lengthy period and by the time we had completed the task Alice suggested that we stop for a spot of lunch.

We got a table at the Savoy and placed our order before they decided to weigh in on my short-comings. Bella began. "Jacob, you know how fond of you we are."

"I have always relied on it," I teased.

"And you know that we have your best interest at heart?" Alice asked.

"But of course. I am grateful to all of you for the kindness you have shown Nessie."

"It was and is our pleasure. She is a delight, just as you said. We are all pledged to make her introduction into society as care free as possible," Alice enthused. Then she paused and I knew at once there was something more. "We have no concerns about that. However, there are a few things we feel it is vital to discuss with you."

Alice looked from me to Bella to Rose. It was clear whatever was to come would not be in my favour.

"Oh fine," Rose grumbled. "We are concerned about your part in all this, Jacob. We can be her guides, her sponsors, her friends, but only you can be her husband."

"Well, yes, that is the plan," I chortled.

"Our concern is that you have little to no idea what that means," Bella said, a pitying look upon her lovely face.

I smiled slyly. I recalled our morning romp and thought I had a fine idea of what it meant. Apparently my look was not as difficult to read as I might have thought. Rosalie smacked my arm with more force than I thought necessary.

"That is not what being a husband is about, at least not nearly all it is about you buffoon. Really, why do we bother?" Rose lamented.

"I never said it was." It was true, I thought it I never said it. "But since you are all so agitated, pray, impart your wisdom and I shall soak it up."

"Well, I am grateful that Edward is my friend. He shares his day with me, his trials, his joys. He asks my opinion and values it. We share so much more than just bed play and our children," Bella explained. She and Edward had been married for five years now, and had a four year old heir, Felix and two year old spare, Stephan. Both Bella and Edward doted on them, and the children were delights.

My only response was a heartfelt smile. I knew they were a good match. After all it was I who matched them. I had known Bella through her father and encouraged Edward to invite her to dance at our very first ball.

"You know Jasper and I share so many things. We talk. I believe he knows me better than anyone alive. If you asked him about my favorite book, my favorite wine, my favorite music, he would know it all and there is a safety in that. I know that he is there for me, and that should I be in need of anything, he will do his utmost to see it done," Alice said.

"I understand. You are very blessed. Why else do you think I worked so hard to unite you two?"

"Because you were certain that Jasper would get himself or you killed," Alice said in utter sincerity. "But what I want to impart is that you are currently not providing that same safety to Renesmee. I have talked to her. She is completely enamored of you, but she does not know you."

"Don't be ridiculous, Alice," I sighed. Ness was far too sensible to be enamored of anyone.

"I'm not. She tells me that although you have been a presence in her life since she was a child, in the last six years you have seen her but rarely."

It was true, but I did not see that it signified. "Well the last two were spent in service to the crown and service to my father," I explained.

"And she knows that, but still. Those four years are quite formative for a young woman. You said yourself that you had no idea she had grown so." Rose added.

"What is the point of all this?"

"Jacob, we like her. We genuinely like her," Bella enthused.

"Jacob, she is a wonderful girl. She is so accomplished, so refined. I cannot believe that she was raised under such circumstances. She deserves a wonderful life, and I am determined she shall have it," Rose stated in a rather dictatorial tone.

"That is my aim as well," I agreed.

"How do you plan to provide it is the question?"

"I have removed her from harm's way. I am marrying her. She will be a duchess one day. What else can I do?"

Rose grumbled something below her breath and turned away, her arms crossed over her chest. Bella attempted to soothe her while Alice put a hand on my sleeve. She sighed dramatically and spoke as if each word was of the utmost importance.

"You can promise us that you will get to know her. Really know her. Promise that you will not allow your physical attraction for her to overshadow your intellectual attraction. You can remember that everything that has happened since you took her from that house is strange and new to her. She is so intent on being what you need her to be that we fear you will neglect finding out what it is she needs you to be."

I looked at my dear friends. They were all in complete earnest. They truly seemed to care for my sweet girl. I was warmed by the fact that she had impressed them so quickly. Still, I felt a bit shamed by their assessment of my relationship with Ness. Was I neglecting her in all this? I had not thought so. But perhaps as women they had an insight I did not.

"How did your husbands learn how to be what you deserved? I mean, Edward always seemed to know what you need, Bella."

"Not always, but when he didn't know he had the good grace to ask," Bella smiled.

"Jasper?"

"Well, you know Jazz has insight beyond most men. Still, I think the thing I most appreciate about him is his patience with me. I am certain that he understood my feelings long before I understood them myself. Still, he waited patiently until I could express and understand the feelings myself."

I nodded. It was true. Jasper had an uncanny ability to read people and situations. It made him invaluable in business. It also made him an invaluable friend, although there were times when he exposed things about his friends that they did not always wish to face. Not me, but Emmett, and occasionally Edward.

Jasper pointed out that Edward could be a bit dictatorial with Bella, and that Bella was not the type of woman to tolerate that forever. Edward discussed it with her and she admitted that it, in point of fact, irritated her. They grew closer once they both acknowledged the difficulty, and strived to never allow it to become a problem, and since then it had not.

Emmett and Rosalie were another pair that Jasper had to sit down and straighten out. They battled rather than wooed. Emmett thought Rose was far above him and Rose agreed. They were like snarling pups all bark and teeth, but no real malice. It was Jasper who finally charged them to admit their attraction and stop the posturing. When they actually looked at each other in light of this insight they fell into each other and were married in a matter of months. Now they had a daughter, Victoria, who had her mother's good looks and her father's talent for mischief.

"Noted, I will practice patience. What advice have you, Rose?"

"The only thing I can say is… try and remember that you have taken her from everything she has known. She does not strike me as the kind to complain, or show fear, but she must be so lost. We can provide friendship and loyalty, but only you can provide her a real home. Somewhere and some one that makes her feel cherished and protected. Speaking of which, where do you plan to settle with her?" Rose asked.

"Well, I…" In truth, I had not even considered it. I was aware that returning to my bachelor rooms was out of the question, but I had given no thought to where we would reside.

"Jacob Black! The girl needs a roof over her head and a hearth for a fire. My God, man!" Rose exploded.

"Well, I thought…" All three of them glared at me and the lie died upon my lips. "I truly am a cad, aren't I?"

"Have you thought about moving her into your father's London house? I mean, it will be hers one day, and it would put you in way of providing him constant company," Bella suggested.

It was true. It would mean that I would be there to oversee my father's progress. It would also provide him with a built in reason to fight for life. "Do you think he would wish it?"

"I think that he would, especially after Ness eases the way between you two," Alice nodded.

"Let us see how Sunday goes. Then I will discuss it with him."

"Wonderful," Alice cheered, "now, about the wedding trip…"

"Oh that I have already decided upon. I wish to take her to Wolf's Bridge. I do not think she has ever been to the country and I want to show her the beauty of Derbyshire."

They all beamed. "That sounds perfect," Bella voiced. "But we insist that you return to London by Christmas. We shall all of us gather and celebrate together, one big happy family."


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

NPOV

Esme and I remained with Sir William until almost three in the afternoon. The light was already beginning to fade as we stepped into the carriage. Being November the days grew ever shorter. When the driver closed the door Esme turned to me. "Well, that was certainly a success."

"Do you think so?" I asked feeling somewhat unsure. His grace seemed satisfied with my answers and the afternoon had been pleasant, but he had handed me a missive for his son, and I had no idea what it might contain.

"I do. Renesmee, both of the Black men are rather poor communicators. You are not alone in being unable to decipher their words and their meaning. But remember, I have known them both for more years than you have been alive, my dear. Trust me."

I did trust Esme. She engendered trust more than any other person I had ever known, with perhaps the exception of Jacob. When she opened her arms to me I willingly went to her and allowed her to calm my fears. She held me close and stroked my hair as she tried to explain the two men I would be tying myself to for life.

"They were both so lost when Sarah was taken from us," Esme explained. "William adored that woman. She was his Sun and Moon. Jacob was the same way. I wish you could have known her. She was the epitome of grace and goodness. She would have been so happy to see Jacob choose such a lovely girl."

I felt an ache at the thought. How I would have enjoyed having Jacob's mother there to assist me and guide me in the proper way of things. Still, I was determined to assist the two Black men in finding each other again.

"Esme, I have to tell Jacob how we spent this day."

She looked down at me, never releasing her embrace, nor ceasing the soft stroking of my hair. "It you think it best."

"I won't begin my life with him with a lie on my lips. If I am to have any hope of reuniting these two men they must trust me. I could, however, exclude your participation in this adventure, if you wish. I do not want to cause you difficulty with Jacob," I offered.

She smiled her kindest smile and shook her head. "Jacob is like my own son. He will never rid himself of me. Don't you worry about me, Renesmee? You do what you feel is right. So far your instincts seem better than most."

"Oh I hope so," I said straightening and looking her in the eye. "It would pain me to have to leave you all."

"Leave us? Oh no, little one, you haven't that option. You see, we have decided to adopt you as one of our own Alice, Bella, Rose and I. You belong to us now. You have no hope of escape," she said with a lilting laugh. "I was blessed with only two children through marriage. So I decided to extend my family through adoption.

Jacob was the first child I claimed as mine to whom I had not given birth. Sarah was my best friend and she begged me to look after both he and William. Jacob brought me Alice. She was the sweetest child, but had been so badly abused that I dedicated myself to seeing to it that she never knew such pain again.

Edward brought me Jasper and Emmett although it was the girls who secured them into our family. Jacob brought Bella into our lives, but it was Edward who made her one of us. And Now Jacob has brought us you. I fear it is far too late for you to escape the association now. I already see you as one of my darlings, and I hope you will not mind having a mother hen watching over you."

I was awestruck. Having never had a parent of any kind I assumed I could not miss what I had never known, but in that moment I felt something I could not identify. I looked at this remarkable woman and knew that she had meant every word she had uttered and that were I to lose her I would lose a piece of myself. I felt the tears upon my cheeks before I realized that I was weeping them.

"Oh, Ness, I am sorry, I did not meant to frighten you. If you do not wish for me to…"

"No, please, do not take it back. I have never wanted anything more, except for Jacob. I am just so frightened that I will awake from this entire dream and all this will be some miraculous illusion," I said through an embarrassing display of tears.

Again, Esme pulled me to her and laughed lightly. "You are not dreaming, dearest. You are the answer to many a prayer. In fact, I believe Sarah sent you to us all."

I arrived back at the Whitlock's and found that only Jasper was at home. He and I shared tea in the golden sitting room and he asked me about shopping with Esme. I must have made a face because he laughed and then asked "Don't tell me I have finally met a woman who does not enjoy the pastime."

I sighed. "The company was delightful, but to be honest, I cannot fathom the necessity of so many varying clothes. In the past few days I have ordered twenty dresses, dozens of shoes and gloves. In all my life I have never owned more than six dresses, and all of those had belonged to at least two others before me. Shoes were considered a luxury and only worn when going to market. I have never worn gloves, ever. Not even in the dead of winter. And Today we ordered at least as many hats."

Jasper tried valiantly not to laugh at me, but a chuckle escaped his lips anyway. "I am certain that you will look exquisite in them all. Ness, have you ever been to see a play?"

I was confused by the question, but answered just the same. "Jacob once took me to see a traveling theatre troupe in the square. Why?"

"Think of these clothes as if you were an actress. They are your costumes for the part of 'Lady Black.'"

I thought about that for a moment and found that it did seem to make the thought more palatable. "Thank you, Jasper. I shall."

After tea and light conversation I excused myself for a lie down. I was drained. My head was so full of all the events of the past few days that I longed to turn it off and find the relief of sleep.

Sometime later, I do not know precisely how long, I felt the warm arms of my beloved encircle me and pull me into his embrace. He was warm and close and I smiled, glad to be beside him again. "I would remain here, holed up with you alone if I thought for an instant that we could get away with it, but Alice was adamant that we make an appearance at the dinner table this evening. So as much as I hate to do it I must release you into the hands of your maid, Little Bird."

I sighed and turned to face him. I made an unhappy sound while burying my head into his neck. He responded my kissing my forehead and sliding his hands down the satin back of my dressing gown. I hummed in pleasure and began kissing his neck. Suddenly I was facing him at arm's length and he was shaking his head.

"Oh no you don't, Alice threatened to drag me down the stairs by whatever means necessary and she may look small, but trust me when she sets her mind to something…" he said as he gently pulled me to the side of the bed and lifted me in his arms. Again I attempted to snuggle and change his mind. He moaned when my teeth lightly abraded his ear lobe.

"God's teeth woman," he sighed, but still he walked me through the dressing room and gently set me on my feet before a wide eyed Jane. "Do not let your mistress out of this room until she is fit for dinner," he said addressing Jane who was staring at him with wide and adoring eyes. Then he turned back to me. "I shall return to accompany you down," he said and the he leaned in swept me to him with one arm and kissed me hotly. He swept his tongue into my mouth and leaned me backward before abruptly righting me and sweeping from the room with another growl of frustration.

I stood there a moment, my fingers touching the lips he had so expertly kissed. I must have stood there a bit too long for in another moment Jane cleared her throat. I turned to face her and she curtseyed. "Are you alright, Miss?" she asked smirking.

I blushed. "I will be, Jane. What shall we dress me in this evening?"

Jane suggested one of the dresses that had arrived in my absence. It was soft lavender with cap sleeves and an empire waist accentuated with a deeper purple ribbon. I smiled when I saw it and nodded. She slipped the soft muslin over my head and then buttoned the back. She wove a ribbon of the same color as the dress' accent through my hair. As she worked she chatted.

"You are such a lucky lady," Jane said on a sigh eyeing the connecting door. "Lord Black is the handsomest gentleman I have ever seen. Not that Lord Whitlock is not handsome, I mean he is. So are some of his friends who visit. Still, Lord Black is just so…"

"He is isn't he?" I teased.

Suddenly I saw Jane's eyes pop wide in the mirror when she realized what she was saying. "Blast! Angela always says I talk too much." Again her eyes bugged as she realized she had sworn. "Please don't dismiss me, Miss. I swear I shall learn to keep my tongue."

I turned to the girl and took her hand. "How old are you Jane?"

She bit her lip. "Sixteen Miss."

I smiled. She was not much younger than myself, and she was trying so hard to do well. "For so young a person you are very dedicated to your work, and just look at how you have made me look as if I belong in this world. How could I ever dismiss someone who does such wonderful work? Besides, I require at least one person in my household whom I can converse with free of judgment. So, please always speak plainly in my presence."

The girl threw her arms about my neck and squeezed tightly before she realized that she perhaps should not have done it and stood abruptly. "Thank you Miss."

"You're quite welcome."

There was a knock at the outer door and Jane opened it to a handsomely dressed Jacob. He wore a crimson tailcoat and black trousers. His waistcoat was black embroidered with golden thread. All I wanted to do was drag him back to the bedroom and rip it all off him.

He raised a single brow as he looked his fill. Then he took a deep breath and blew it from his lips. "May I accompany you to dinner, my sweet?"

"Of course, my lord," I said taking his proffered arm.

As we descended the winding stairway he leaned into my ear and said "How is it you grow more beautiful every day?"

"Perhaps it is all the new clothes. You have never seen me so richly adorned. Once you are used to seeing me this way I fear you will find that the truth of it is I am not changing in appearance at all."

"That cannot be it. For you are most beautiful when you lie naked in my bed."

I turned to chastise him for being so forward, but we had reached the bottom of the stairs and Smithers was standing post outside the dining room doors. We went into supper and did not have the opportunity to continue our very private discussion.

After we dined we all moved to the evening sitting room. Alice and I sipped tea while the gentlemen drank fine brandy wine. I found myself thinking back to my conversation with Esme. She was right. Being with these people felt like home, something I had never before experienced. I realized that by deceiving Jacob about my destination this day I was risking losing his respect, and his affection. I owed him better. He had ever been generous with me and my behavior was that of an ingrate.

"I swear it is true. Tell them, Ness," Jasper urged breaking into my reverie.

"What?"

"Jasper is claiming that you told him you did not enjoy shopping and I told him I would not believe such scandal," Alice teased.

I attempted to smile, but could feel that I was not successful. "I fear he is being truthful. Although I did tell him that I enjoyed the time spent with you and Lady Esme immensely."

Alice eyed me with concern. "Are you alright?"

"I am a bit fatigued, I think. Would you mind terribly if I excused myself?"

"Of course not," Alice said sympathetically.

"I think I must beg off as well, Alice," Jacob said rising and taking my hand in his own.

"You look after her, Jacob," Alice demanded.

"Of course," he said sketching a bow to both Alice and Jasper.

We walked up the stairs and he opened the door to the dressing room. Jane popped up immediately. "Jane, is it?" Jacob addressed the girl. She nodded immediately. "Miss Cherish will not require your assistance this evening, but could you arrange for a bath to be drawn?"

"Yes, m'lord," Jane said bobbing a curtsey and slipping from the room.

"Tonight is all about you, Little Bird. Let me take care of all your needs."

I swallowed hard and looked up at his magnificent face and felt the tears begin to flow again. He made to embrace me, but I slipped from his grasp and went to the vanity. I opened the drawer and withdrew the letter from his father. "I have a confession to make." I said licking my lips and trying to maintain some dignity.

His brow furrowed and he stared at me. I took his hand and led him through to the bed chamber closing the door behind us. I sat him in one of the chairs before the fire and sank to the floor before him.

"Yesterday I received a note from your father asking me to attend him in private. He bid me do so without confiding in you, and today, I did just that. I know it was wrong, and I am so very sorry for deceiving you."

He watched me as if I were some foreign creature he had never seen before, but he said nothing.

"I wanted to… That is I hoped to… To be honest I have no idea what I thought I could do, but you said that your father would never respect me were I to cow to him. I thought it went well, but before Lady Esme and I departed he penned this for you and bid me give it to you," I said handing him the letter.

He took the letter, but he was still staring at me. He broke the seal and read the missive then shook his head and said "I'll be damned. Alice was right." I did not understand and looked at him wondering his meaning. "I really do not know you at all."


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: I LOVE all the reviews, comments, concerns, insights, questions… But please know that if you review as a guest I cannot respond to you and I feel sooooooooo badly. I love the conversations I am able to have with my readers. This is a personal plea… I will answer you and send you a preview of the next chapter if you sign in and I am able to respond. Or PM me and I will send it to you if you do not want your name on it publically.

Chapter 21

JPOV

"I have a confession to make." She said licking her lips and looking quite guilty.

I was suddenly afraid that what she was about to tell me would cause her to depart, and I did not want that. She took my hand and led me through to the bed chamber closing the door behind us. She sat me in one of the chairs before the fire and sank to the floor before me.

"Yesterday I received a note from your father asking me to attend him in private. He bid me do so without confiding in you, and today, I did just that. I know it was wrong, and I am so very sorry for deceiving you."

I watched her as my mind desperately tried to make sense of what she had just told me. Good Lord, what had my sire done now? Did he bully her? Did he give her reason to leave me?

"I wanted to… That is I hoped to… To be honest I have no idea what I thought I could do, but you said that your father would never respect me were I to cow to him. I thought it went well, but before Lady Esme and I departed he penned this for you and bid me give it to you," She said handing me the letter.

I took the letter. I realized in that moment that she had gone to see my father for me. Why would she do that? What would possess her to put herself in harm's way for me? Then I broke the wax seal. Opened the letter and read my father's words. She had done it. She had captured him as easily as she had captured my friends and this letter gave his whole hearted approval. "I'll be damned? Alice was right. I really do not know you at all."

Her face fell and she shuddered as if I had struck her. I saw a tear roll down her cheek and felt horrible. I lifted her onto my lap and smoothed her face. "Oh, Little Bird, I did not mean that the way it came out. I only meant that the girl I knew would never have confronted anyone, let alone a man she had never met. You astonish me. You have become such an amazing woman and I need to investigate who you really are.

Alice, Bella, and Rose shamed me today by asking me things about you that I should know and didn't. They pointed out that I have failed you in how I sought your hand in marriage. I owe you an apology, Ness. You deserve to be wooed and I swear from this day forward you shall be."

I stood with her in my arms and carried her to the bed. She clung to my neck and whispered. "So you are not angry?"

"No sweet. I am not angry." I sat her on the bed and sat next to her. She really was so beautiful. Were I to have seen her across a ballroom floor I would have done everything in my power to gain an introduction. I had gone about this so badly. "I am in awe. How on Earth did you manage to sway my father in a mere afternoon? I spent all day yesterday and left with the knowledge that I had failed utterly. He spends a few hours with you and sends me this." I read her his missive and watched her relax.

_Son,_

_I must beg your forgiveness. Today I made arrangements to meet with your charming fiancé. It was wrong of me to do this without your knowledge or consent, but I hoped to gain some understanding of the truth of your relationship._

_She is everything you told me she was, bright and sweet, kind and lovely. I could not have chosen better for you had I tried. And in truth I should not have ever thought to try. I want you happy, Jacob. That is all. I believe you have a very good chance at happiness with this young lady._

_You have my whole hearted approval, Son. I will announce it when we dine together on Sunday, and I will bring something special for you that I have held in reserve for this very moment._

_Well done, Jacob._

_Your Father_

"I cannot remember the last time he addressed me as 'Son.'" I confessed.

"Oh, Jacob," she said leaning in to kiss me.

When our lips parted and our eyes opened I smiled at her. "Now," I said standing, "I told you that tonight was all about you." I stood and pulled her up from the bed. "I mean to rectify my errors and get to know the new Nessie."

"And just how do you propose doing that?" she asked seductively.

I swallowed, hard. I had begun this tack with the best of intentions. I planned to talk to her, get to know her again. Discover the woman she had become. I only forgot one factor, the fact that the woman she had become would be standing before me. She eyed me with a 'come hither' look and my trousers grew tight. I wanted her again. Would it always be this way? God, I hoped so.

Without another thought I pulled her in for a searing kiss. She opened to me and suddenly both our passions flared white hot. We were both frantically fiddling with buttons and ties to free each other of the confining clothing that separated us. It took far too long to shed them, but once we were free we were all lips and tongue and sensation.

Ness seemed as needy as I felt and when I made to lift her she hopped into my arms without breaking our kiss. And of course it was at that moment that the soft knock came from the bathing room. I swore softly and Ness giggled.

"I really must remember to stop asking the servants for things when I am near you," I said resting my forehead against hers.

"Thank you Jane, you may go now," Ness said to the door before dissolving in a fit of giggles.

"Yes Miss," came the girl's muffled voice.

We listened for the doors closing in her wake and when we were certain she was gone we entered the bathing chamber together. There laid out before the fire were soft towels, and an array of fragrant oils. I stood Ness on her feet and tested the water's temperature. It was steamy and perfect. I found oil that smelled of vanilla and poured it into the water. Then I stepped into the bath and sat at one end. Then I reached for the beautiful seductress before me. She gave me a quizzical look but I drew her forward.

"Join me," I pleaded.

"Really?" she asked unsure.

"Really," I confirmed. She took a step closer and looked to the opposite side of the tub. "No, Ness, please face me and step in."

She did as I bid. Standing before me in all her glorious splendor I knew I would never be able to concentrate on talking to her until I slaked my thirst for her. I ran my hands up her calves and gently pressed the back of her knees urging her forward. Once she was standing within reach I began to kiss her thighs, my hands urging her to open to me. When she did I lifted my lips to her nether region and kissed her with all the passion I possessed. I felt her sigh rather than heard it. Soon her knees began to give way and I eased her over my legs until she straddled me intimately. I kissed her lips and eased my hands across her perfect posterior. As I kissed her I lifted her onto my manhood and buried myself deep.

The sound she made almost unmanned me, it was a soul deep sound of pleasure and in an instant we began moving in a rhythm that was old as time. We kissed and caressed, aided by the slickness of our skin. It was a slow building excitement that culminated in her arching back until her hair was floating on the water and I was sheathed ever deeper within her pleasure center. We both reached completion together and as we came back to ourselves I lifted her to me again for one more kiss.

"We need to get you in a dressing gown and warm," I said as I kissed her neck. "The water is cooling, and I cannot have you taking a chill."

We stood together and dried each other with the towels. Jane had provided a night-rail and wrap for Ness. I led her into the bed chamber and donned my dressing gown. I poured us each a glass of wine and sat Ness before me by the fire. I took a soft bristled brush and began pulling it through her hair. I had never brushed a woman's hair before. It shimmered in the light of the fire and I found myself fascinated by the play of light within its depths.

"Mmm, that feels heavenly," she sighed.

"Good," I said continuing my strokes. "Ness, I meant what I said. I have failed you in this courtship, but I mean to remedy that."

"So you said, but you have yet to explain how."

"I thought we could play the question game."

She turned to face me and gave me a look that was rife with disbelief. "You mean as we did when I was a child?"

"Exactly, we each take turns asking the other a question and we promise to be honest and forthcoming with our answers."

"And we can ask anything?"

"Anything and everything," I agreed turning her shoulders so she again faced the fire and I could continue to brush her hair. "I'll even let you ask first, if you like."

As a child she asked me so many things. Mostly about the books I brought her. Later, as she grew the questions were more about my opinions about poetry, literature, or music. She had always been so curious, but thinking back, I realized that I did not ask nearly as many questions of her. This time I would not let that be the case.

"No," she said, "you first."

"Alright, what is your favorite colour?"

She thought for a moment and then said "Blue, but not the blue of the sky, it is more a royal blue, deep and warm."

"So specific," I teased. "Why that particular blue?"

"Because it was the shade of your tailcoat the day I met you," she said turning again to face me.

"How do you remember that?"

"I saw many gentlemen pass through those doors," she said draping her arms across my knee and placing her chin upon them. "The older gentlemen mostly wore black coats. The younger men were most often attired in regimentals, so their coats were red or pale blue, but you wore a tailcoat of superfine royal blue. It was a calming color, and warm."

I looked down into her soft face and saw a look of such intensity in her eyes. She had always looked at me so. For the first time I wondered at the meaning of that look. I stroked her cheek and smiled. "Your turn."

"What is your favorite colour?" she parroted back at me.

I chuckled. "I do not know that I have one," I confessed.

She sat straight and raised her head regally. "Oh, no, you made the rules to this game, now you must abide by them. What is your favorite colour?"

I smiled. She was ever an insistent inquisitor. I thought for a moment and closed my eyes trying to conjure the colour in my head. Then it came to me and I began to describe it. "It is not one colour; it's more an amalgamation of colours. It is the gold of candlelight, the orange of sunrise, the shiny sheen of a copper pot hanging over flame." As I described it to her I realized that it was the color of her hair, which somehow I had begun to weave my fingers through. I opened my eyes and saw the spectrum dance within my hands and smiled again. "It is you."

A lone tear slid down her cheek as she laid her head on my lap and said "Your turn."

Back and forth we went on into the night. What was her favorite poem and why? What was my favorite sport and why? Had she ever learned to skip a stone across water? She had not. Had I ever played an instrument? I had not. The questions we asked had no great import; those would wait until we had grown a bit more comfortable with this game, but we talked until we could talk no more. Ness drifted to sleep with her head on my chest and I pulled the blankets up around us.

I lifted a curl and wound it around my finger. It was so soft, and every colour I had described was woven through the lock. When had this become my favorite colour? When had it begun to mean warmth and joy?

When had she begun to mean so much? No, it was just that she now relied on me for everything; her support, her livelihood, her care and keeping. It must be fatigue that was muddying my mind with thoughts of care. I needed sleep.


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: Thank you for your patience, here is the next chapter. I have not abandoned the tale it simply takes time to write. I have been trying to post a couple of times a week, but I will run out of chapters before I have another to give you if I do that. So things may slow a bit, fear not I will complete the story. I promise.

Chapter 22

NPOV

The day dawned brightly through the curtains. I awoke draped across Jacob's chest and encircled by his strong arms. I looked up at his handsome face, just kissed by the morning sun and smiled. I would help him to reconcile with his father. I would be the best wife and duchess he had ever seen, and for my efforts I would gain his respect, his affection, and his love. It was everything I had dreamed of finally coming to fruition.

I kissed him in the center of his chest, and attempted to slip from his arms, but they tightened around me. I looked up at his face and found his onyx eyes looking back at me. "And where do you think you are going, young lady?"

I grinned at his teasing tone. "I thought to begin the day. I know Alice has a mountain of things for me to do before the party this evening," I explained.

"That well may be, but you are not leaving this bed without a proper good morning for your fiancé."

"What constitutes a 'proper good morning,' my lord?"

"Come here and I will demonstrate," he said rolling me onto my back and kissing me. His lips were soft and gentle, yet still urgent and demanding. I wound my arms around him and pulled him closer. He parted my thighs with his talented hands and seated himself at my entrance. "I want you," he said against my lips.

"Again?" I said with a smile and an encouraging tilt of my hips.

"Always…"

When we had caught our breath and were basking in the afterglow of our romp I lifted my head and stared at this man who I adored. "Have you always been this insatiable? I cannot imagine that you have, or you would never have had time to spend with me when I was young. You would have been too busy above stairs."

He rested his head upon his hand and looked thoughtful. He stroked my cheek with the pad of him thumb and squinted as if he was remembering something. "I do not think I have ever, even in my randy youth, wanted a woman the way I want you. Not even with… Huh…" he turned his head to the side and then shook it lightly.

"Is everything alright?" I asked.

"Everything is…" he paused a moment, "just right. Now, best we get dressed and make our way to breakfast. After all, Alice has a mountain of things for you to do before the party," he teased.

Alice did indeed have a list of tasks to accomplish on this day. She explained that she could use this dinner party as a means for teaching me the art of playing hostess and society wife. She showed me how to go over menus with the cook. She was determined, but open to suggestion and in the end the offerings sounded delicious. Then she explained how invitations were generally handled and how keeping an engagement calendar made life so much easier, especially when the season was in full swing.

The afternoon was spent with Jane. She helped me bathe and dressed my hair and then my body. In the end I looked like me, only a bit more polished and a bit more confident. Knowing that Jacob's father approved the match made it possible to breathe again.

Then Cullens, McCartys, and Masens all arrived bundled against the cold and ready to enjoy good food, good wine, and good company. We began the evening in the drawing room. I was introduced to Rose's husband, Emmett. He was a mountain of a man with a wicked grin and the deepest dimples I had ever seen. He bowed over my hand and then clapped Jacob hard on the back, sending him forward by three steps.

"Well, I'll be damned. Who would've thought that a woman this beautiful, whom my wife thinks is both sweet and intelligent, would ever be fooled into consenting to be tied to a rogue such as yourself?" he asked Jacob. Then he took my hand and led me away whispering in a way that everyone could hear "I have all the on-dit on this reprobate you have chosen. If ever you require leverage in an argument, I would happily supply you with ammunition."

In an instant Lord Masen took my other arm and led me away from Lord McCarty. "Do not listen to my brother-in-law, my dear. The true dirt is buried in the hearts and minds of these fine ladies you see here. Still, should you ever require a champion I offer you my services."

Through all this the ladies were laughing and getting in Jacob's way as he tried to rescue me, or prevent me from hearing their teasing. Finally he made it to my side and steered me away from Lord Masen to Lady Esme and her handsome companion.

"Good evening, Renesmee," Lady Esme greeted me and kissed my cheeks.

"Esme, it seems I owe you even more than I imagined," Jacob said embracing the woman who had taken the role of his mother.

"I did nothing. It was all this beautiful girl and her sweetness."

I blushed and tried to turn away, but Jacob held me fast and said "Nessie, allow me to introduce you to the man I most admire in this world. Lord Carlisle Cullen, allow me to present my fiancé, Miss Renesmee Cherish."

The man before me was tall and lean. His hair was a honeyed blonde and his eyes a crystalline blue. He bowed over my hand and smiled. "Miss Cherish, my great pleasure."

"Lord Cullen," I said bobbing a curtsey.

"Jacob, why don't you and I go and have a drink?" Esme said taking him by the arm and leading him away.

Lord Cullen led me to a seat and took the seat next to me. He grinned at me and I liked his looks. There was something kind in his eyes and although he reeked of wealth and class, he also gave off an air of concern and compassion.

"I hope you will forgive my wife for luring Jacob away, but I asked her to distract him so that I might have a moment to speak with you in private," he confessed. I nodded. "Jacob is family, as dear to us as our own children."

"So I have been told, repeatedly," I said a bit defensively. I looked at this man, so dear to the man I loved and felt badly for what I said. "I'm sorry, that came out wrong."

"Not at all, I am certain that every person in this room has at one point or another mentioned how dear he is to us. Or if they have not yet, they undoubtedly will. My reason for mentioning it is perhaps a bit different than the others.

Renesmee, such a pretty name, and so unusual. Still, I am quite familiar with it."

That caught my attention. I raised my eyes to his and found my mouth instantly dry.

"Familiar…?"

"Yes, you see some twelve years ago young Jacob came to visit me with an urgent concern. He explained that he had met a child under the most inappropriate care. He told me that she was bright and sweet, and that he had never before felt so strongly that he must do something. He explained her circumstances and asked my advice."

I found myself fascinated by his tale. I never truly understood how and why Jacob had intervened in my lot.

"He was a mere youth at the time and I feared that his interest in her would wane. Still, he was quite determined to see to it that the girl was cared for and offered a chance at a better life. I assisted him in finding her a tutor. Monsieur Alistair kept me abreast of the girl's progress and wellbeing. I was rather surprised when Jacob continued to speak of her and to ask my advice regarding her continued introduction into the world.

After several years he continued to discuss her progress with me. He spoke proudly of her accomplishments and her developing character. I knew that this child was providing him with something he sorely needed, so I continued to encourage him in this endeavor."

"What did she provide him?" I asked as if I did not realize that the child he spoke of was me.

"She gave him someone to care for without fear."

That was not at all what I had expected him to say and I leaned closer needing to understand his meaning. "Fear of what?"

"Jacob had lost his mother and his father when Sarah departed this world. They tried to do right by him throughout her illness, but in the end they failed to understand that children must grieve as well as adults. I tended to her and tried to make her see that Jacob would not understand that she was protecting him. William was devastated when he lost her. He could not face himself, how was he to face an angry child who wanted answers?

Then just as he began to mature from a boy to a youth he was wounded by another loss. He was betrayed by someone who used him ill. The blow was sharp and painful and Jacob ran from almost all those that loved him.

It was in the midst of all this that he met you. His care of you and your plight helped to keep him from plunging off the precipice into oblivion. He was able to channel the pain he felt into a desire to prevent you from experiencing pain. You provided a means for me to teach him that honor and goodness can be rewards all on their own, and in providing that you saved him."

"Oh, my lord, I fear you have mistaken me. It is not I who saved him, but the other way round."

"No, Renesmee, I know that you saved him. He had gone to a dark place. He truly meant to live his life as a feckless wastrel, but in claiming you as his responsibility he found someone for whom he needed to provide, someone who relied upon him. That is a powerful gift to a man." Lord Cullen said taking my hand in his own.

I looked over my shoulder at Jacob, who was laughing with Emmett and Edward. He had always seemed the epitome of a man to me. I worshiped him as my hero. Could it truly be that I had provided rescue to him in return?

"You truly love him, don't you?"

"I do," I confessed.

"You are going to have a hard row to hoe to make him realize how precious a gift that is, but I want you to remember that you are not alone in this. Jacob is loved by every soul in this room and some outside it as well. If you require anything from us to assist you in your life from this day forward, we are all pledged to provide it. Jacob deserves to be loved, whether he believes it or not."


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

JPOV

The days passed in a pleasant haze. I watched Nessie charm and win over all the people in my life with ease and alacrity. Each one tumbled as if Ness was a gentle breeze which somehow felled the trees. I was so proud of her. She won Esme with her gentility and genuineness. Bella shared an affinity for books with her, and Edward found their budding friendship endearing. Rose enjoyed Nessie's wit and humour and Emmett was no match for her quickness. Every time he tried to trap her in a game of wits she turned the tide and ended with him turning red. Rose applauded her and Emmett respected her. Alice had accepted her from the first, but Ness seemed to go out of her way to ensure that Alice was consulted and informed of her decisions and tastes. Jasper approved of anyone who treated his wife with such care and concern.

But it was Carlisle's opinion I wanted most. He had a tendency to hold his approval in reserve until he knew a person's character and motivations. But even he seemed enchanted. He spoke softly to her, and looked upon her with a fatherly gaze. Of course in many ways he was no stranger to my sweet girl. It was he whom I had consulted when I wanted to intervene in young Renesmee's life. It was he who had provided me with Monsieur Alistair and together we set up a fund to provide Ness with his services even after I departed for the war.

I had crowed over her successes and worried about her circumstances. Carlisle had been my confessor through it all. Yet I had not gone to him when I decided to make her my bride. I had my reasons, of course, or so I told myself. The truth was I was expecting him to point out all the reasons she was inappropriate as my future duchess. Instead I watched him smile. I watched him watch her as she moved in and out of conversations and interactions, and I waited.

On Friday I received a note from my mentor asking if I would take a ride with him on Saturday. I dressed in my riding gear and awaited his arrival. We mounted our horses and headed to St. James at a leisurely pace. It was several minutes before he spoke. "Lovely weather we are having." I turned to him in shock. Was he really speaking of the weather? Then I saw the crinkle of his eyes as he burst out laughing. "Sometimes it is just too easy," he chuckled. "Why don't you tell me what has you so nervous, Jake."

And instantly, with the use of his personal name for me I relaxed. "I have been awaiting your opinion of Nessie."

"Does my opinion matter?"

"To me it does, yes."

"Why?"

"You have always been my guide, my mentor, my conscience. I look to you for validation that I am on the right path," I confessed.

"Why? Jacob, you are no longer a child. Your decisions have for some time proven you a fine upstanding gentleman. You have not needed a guide for some time. Why would you doubt what should be the easiest decision in your life?"

"Easy? You have always stressed the importance of choosing a wife wisely."

"Have you not? Is she not someone you have known for years? Do you not have a long standing relationship with her? Can you not picture your life together?" he asked me all the questions he had told me to consider in choosing a spouse.

"I have, but you and I also know from whence she comes. Am I asking too much of her?"

"Only she can answer that question. I know what you are getting from this marriage. She is lovely. She is kind and sweet, yet there is an independence and unconventional air to her that is both exciting and intriguing. I know how you look at her. You feel a desire for her, that much is clear. My only question is what you are offering her?"

"I am raising her prospects, certainly."

Carlisle shook his head. "Money is something that can be gained through work, Jacob. Renesmee does not strike me as a woman interested in your means. I would challenge you to discover exactly what it is she needs from you, and then strive to provide it."

"I swear I shall do my utmost."

He smiled at me and I felt immensely better, until we turned the corner of Bond Street and my eye was caught by a flash of crimson. I turned toward the colour and saw my past descend from a carriage.

She was older. Well, it had been twelve years since I had last laid eyes upon her. Her ebony hair was piled intricately upon her head and her face was partially covered by the black veil on her hat, but I would have known her anywhere. In an instant I was transported to my sixteen-year-old self and the moment I learned exactly what love got you.

_I was enjoying my first season under the tutelage of my cousin Samuel. He was taking me to balls and the club and showing me the wonders of London. I stayed in his bachelor rooms while in town, although he was rarely there. He stayed with his mistress more often than not._

_ She was a young widow who had been married to a French lord. His name was Marquis Henry L'eau Claire and he had died of heart failure, in the marriage bed, or so the story went. He left his lands to a son from a previous marriage, and his Marquess was left to raise his only child and manage the boy's inheritance until his majority._

_ "Believe me, Jacob," Sam said "a woman with Leah's skills is hard to find. She is talented beyond reason at bed play. Let me tell you, when you choose a mistress choose one who leaves you panting at the end of the night."_

_ I was embarrassed by the talk of sex, but I tried to adopt an air of bravado. "I shall try to remember that."_

_ "When the time comes, I shall assist you in your introduction to the art of passion. I will ensure that you are taught by a woman who is both skilled and safe. I will teach you the houses that are respectable and clean, and I will answer any and all questions you may have. It is what my father did for me, and what your father should have done for you, but as he has not stepped up, I shall not abandon you."_

_ "You are a good cousin and a good friend," I said earnestly._

_ "Leah will be at the ball this evening. I shall introduce you. You might even dance with her for me as it is unseemly for me to show too strong a preference for a woman I have no intention of marrying."_

_ That evening we attended the fete at the Duke of Ateara's home. It was a huge crush with flowing wine and flouncing skirts. I spent an inordinate amount of time being introduced to young ladies who had neither grace, nor conversation. Finally, Sam waved me over and presented me to the most stunningly beautiful woman I had ever seen._

_ She was exotic and sensual with ebony hair and ruby lips. Her eyes were lined with coal and her gaze pierced. She was Sam's age, about six years my senior, yet she seemed youthful and glittering among these dull society virgins. Her dress was claret while those around her were pastel. Her form was lush, while the assembled females around us were gamine. Her bosom was prominent, and her décolletage cut deep. I was lost in her beauty in a moment and she smiled._

_ "Comment votre cousine est beau, Samuel. Je pourrais le manger," she purred. "Tell me, Jacob, do you speak French?"_

_ "Oui, madame," I said raising her hand to my lips. _

_ I was so taken with her that I forgot about my cousin completely. I fetched her punch and filled her plate during dinner. I hung on her every word and had fallen completely under her spell by the time she turned to me and said "Are you not going to ask me to dance, Jacob?"_

_ I did at once and as we traversed the floor I felt like a God. I was in the arms of the most incredible creature on the Earth. Somewhere during that dance things changed. It was no longer me who was leading her, but the other way around. I found myself out on the terrace and then led into the maze. In an instant she had me pressed against the ivy wall and she kissed me. Her lips were warm and sweet and I drank her in. When she parted my lips with her tongue I responded by instinct and was hard as a pikestaff. Her hand slid down the front of my breeches and she caressed my manhood through the fall of my trousers._

_ "Mm, you are quite a handful, aren't you, lad?" she purred into my ear as her tongue tasted its shell. "Tell me, have you had a woman before?"_

_ "No," I squeaked._

_ She smiled slyly. "Well, the woman who plucks your innocence will be a lucky girl."_

_ She left me in the maze, trying desperately to calm my raging erection and to master my racing heart. When I finally reentered the ballroom I scanned it for my cousin. I spotted him with a sweet looking girl in a blush gown. He was flirting outrageously and the girl was blushing prettily while her doting mama stood by beaming from ear to ear._

_ I approached them and bowed to the girl and her mother. Sam introduced them as Lady Lydia Young and her daughter Emily. I stood by them awaiting the moment when Sam extricated himself from their company and moved us to a new acquaintance, but it did not happen. He waited on the sidelines while Emily danced with other gentlemen. His eyes followed her every move. He barely spoke to me for the remainder of the evening. Then as the evening drew to a close he turned to me and said "Jacob, will you make my excuses to Marquess L'eau Claire?"_

_ "Of course," I said completely confused. "Will you not be joining her this evening?"_

_ "If things go well at my meeting with Lord Young, I may not be joining her ever again," he sighed._

_ I was stymied by his comment, but I was also thrilled to be able to speak with her again, so off I went._

_ I told her that Sam would not be joining her this evening and she narrowed her eyes. "Of course not. He must be busy with negotiations."_

_ "Negotiations?" I asked._

_ "Do not concern yourself, Jacob. Will you give him this note when he returns?"_

_ She wrote a few sentences and folded the note handing it to me by sliding into the pocket of my tailcoat. Then she leaned into my ear and whispered "Perhaps I shall see you soon. We could have such fun."_

_ The next week flew by in a whirlwind. Sam began courting Miss Emily and told me that he planned to propose by the end of the month. He gushed that he had never before understood love, but that having met Emily it all made perfect sense._

_ He suggested that I return to my father's residence and allow him to court his love. It was the last thing I wanted to do. So instead I wandered the streets of London praying an alternative would present itself. It did of course._

_ Her carriage pulled up beside me in the street and the door opened. She welcomed me in and we drove to the home she had been put up in by my cousin. Of course I did not know that at the time. She flattered me. She seduced me, and she lied to me._

_ The first time she took me to her bed she swore that she had never had another who had satisfied her more. She taught me things I had never imagined. I believed her talk of love and forever. I would have given her my soul. In many ways I did. We spent a blissful month together and I thought for certain that she would be the woman I spent my life with._

_ What a fool I was. I was sixteen. What woman of twenty-two would have ever considered me a mate. I was a child. Still the day that Samuel stormed into our love nest waving a letter was a definite shock._

_ Leah and I were in bed and she was draped across my chest when Sam threw open the door. He saw me there and rolled his eyes. "Seriously? What is this meant to prove?"_

_ "Well, since you have moved on to your virgin, I thought I would find my own. How does it feel seeing me in the arms of your cousin?" Leah asked him, stroking my chest._

_ Sam turned to me "Jacob, get dressed. This is ridiculous."_

_ "What is ridiculous? That we are in love?" I said haughtily._

_ He laughed at me. He threw his head back and laughed. "Love, is it? Are you aware that she summoned me here with a tale of her imminent suicide?" he said waving the letter._

_ I turned to her and she scoffed._

_ "She wanted me to find you in exactly this position. This entire performance is for my benefit, Jacob, not yours. And I can prove it."_

_ He walked to her side of the bed. "I'll return to you," he said. "I'll keep you, even after I have wed Miss Young. On one condition."_

_ "Name it," she purred._

_ I could not believe I was hearing this._

_ "You must never touch my cousin again."_

_ I felt my stomach hit the floor. I felt physically ill._

_ The woman I had given my heart turned to me and smiled. "It has been grand, sweet, but what Sam and I have is so much more than mere physical pleasure. You will always be a fond memory, but I must honor my previous commitment. You understand, don't you?"_

_ I all but flew from the bed and Samuel handed me a dressing gown. "Exactly as I thought. You have three days to clear out of this residence. If you remain here I shall put my solicitor on notice and have you removed. I want nothing to do with you from this day forward"_

_ Samuel placed his arm round my shoulder and turned me toward the door. "I am so sorry you go caught up in this, Jacob."_

_ I turned for one last look at the woman whom I had offered my heart. She turned down the sheet and patted the bed where I had abandoned it. "My bed is open again, sweeting. Will you come warm it?"_

_ "When Hell freezes over!" I spat and ran from the room._

_ For months I languished in a sea of pain. For the first time I allowed myself to feel the pain not only of a broken heart, but the loss of my parents. It was as if my entire being had been rent in two. Nothing filled the void. Sam was kind enough to gain me access to three fine brothels. He advised that I wipe her memory from my mind with the myriad of pleasures to be had in London._

_ I had two, sometimes three doves a night for months. I swore that I would never again let my heart be victim to love. No one would have the chance to destroy me by leaving me alone again. I learned to forgo sleep to stem the nightmares. If I fell into bed exhausted it was easier to pretend I was not frightened of the darkness. _

It had been so for more years than I cared to count, every night falling into bed and praying that I could manage five or six hours before I awoke in a cold sweat, until a week ago.

My hesitation cost me. Leah turned and our eyes met. Her lips raised in a small smile of recognition. I could not breathe. I turned the horse and rode hell bent for leather until I dismounted and stormed through the front door.

I ran through the rooms searching. I needed to touch my girl. I needed to know she was real and that she was here.

"Nessie," I cried in frustration. "Ness!"

Alice opened the door to her sitting room and I barreled through the doorway. She was there across the room, her eyes wide and her face pale. I rushed to her side and scooped her into my arms before she could utter a word. I turned and headed to the hallway.

"Jacob, what are you…" Alice began, but Carlisle had entered the room and stilled her with a hand on her arm.

"Let him go, Alice."

In bounding steps I made my way to our chambers. I threw open the door and saw Jane at her post. "Out!" The girl squeaked and bolted from the room. I walked to the bed and slid Ness down my frame and onto her feet.

"Jacob?" she asked placing a palm on my cheek.

"I need you, Ness. If you deny me I may go mad."

Her eyes searched my face. I knew she was frightened, but somehow she did not question me further. She simply turned so I could begin unlacing her gown. I had to concentrate to ensure that I did not hurt her with my haste, but I needed to be buried within her sheath. I had never needed anything more.

Translations:

_L'eau Claire- Clear water_

_Comment votre cousine est beau, Samuel. Je pourrais le manger- how handsome your cousin is, Samuel. I could just eat him up._


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: I am not one for author's notes, as I am certain you have ascertained, but I felt obligated to post this. The next two chapters contain an encounter between Nessie and Jacob that is quite intense and quite disturbing. THERE IS NOT A RAPE! There is a consensual act that goes awry. I am aware that this may be disturbing to some, so please read with caution and understanding. Thank you.

Chapter 24

NPOV

Alice and I were in the drawing room when we heard the commotion, doors banging and someone crying out. It took several minutes before it became clear the calling was for me. Jacob sounded tortured. I stood and thought to go to him, but Alice stayed me with a hand. Then we heard him down the hall.

"Ness!" he cried.

Alice opened the door to her sitting room and Jacob barreled through the doorway. He looked crazed. His eyes wild and his face pale. I had not seen that look on his face in almost twelve years. It was the look he wore when he first came to Mrs. Cope's. It was a lost and tortured look and it frightened me. He rushed to my side and scooped me off my feet before I could utter a word. With me in his arms he turned and headed to the hallway.

"Jacob, what are you…" Alice began, but Carlisle had entered the room and stilled her with a hand on her arm.

"Let him go, Alice."

In bounding steps Jacob took me to our chambers. He threw open the door and saw Jane at her post. Poor girl was startled nearly to death. She squeaked and bobbed a curtsey, but Jacob simply barked "Out!"

Jane bolted from the room. He stalked to the bed and slid me down his frame and onto my feet.

"Jacob?" I asked placing a palm on his cheek. He looked so lost and all I wanted to do was ease his pain.

"I need you, Ness. If you deny me I may go mad," he said in a strangled tone.

My eyes searched his face. He meant what he said. If he needed me then I would give myself to him. I turned so he could begin unlacing my gown. His hands were trembling and even when my laces were untied it was with shaking hands that he slid the gown from my shoulders. I stepped out of it and waited for him to divest me of my stays. His frustration seemed to rise and he all but ripped it off me. I slid the shift off my head and turned to him to find him shedding his own clothes in a hurried rush. When he was through he lifted me and all but tossed me onto the bed.

There was none of his tender kisses. No gentle coaxing. He kissed me harshly and with what tasted like anger rather than affection. Suddenly I was frightened. This was not the lover I had come to know. This was a stranger. He parted my thighs with determined movements and cupped my womanhood. His ministrations seemed almost perfunctory, his strokes held none of the teasing and sensual play that I had come to expect from his touch. When he determined I was ready for him he took his manhood in hand and gathered my moisture on its head to ease his way. In a moment he had seated himself within my center.

I lifted my hands to cup his face and noticed for the first time that his eyes were tightly closed. He had never closed his eyes during our bedding before. His face was stone and he began to move within me with a determination that seemed utilitarian rather than passionate. I tried to soothe him with my hands and my kisses, but he shook them off. I tried again, this time he grabbed my wrists and lifted my hands above my head, clasping both wrists within one of his hands. He held me firm.

His thrusts were hard and fast and they lacked his usual finesse. It was as if all he wanted was to find his release. I struggled to free my hands, but he refused to yield. His eyes remained tightly squeezed shut and still he thrust toward his goal. Finally, I could take no more.

"Jacob…" I said trying to bring him back to me. He grunted and again tried to proceed, I twisted beneath him and pulled at my wrists, but it became clear that I was of no importance in this particular act. For the first time ever, Jacob was treating me as I had always seen him treat the doves, and I would not have it.

"Jacob, stop this! Stop!"

He responded to the order instantly and released me. His eyes opened and appeared confused. He looked down at me and then rolled off me as if scalded. I pulled the counter-plane up to cover myself and looked at his back as he tried to regain control over his breathing. I had never before felt frightened of Jacob, and more than that, I had never felt used. I glared at him from across the bed trying to master myself enough to discover what was happening.

"Are you going to tell me what that was all about?" I demanded.

He turned to face me. Again he looked lost and suddenly he buried his face in his hands and scrubbed it with his palms. When he was done he looked more like himself, except that he looked horrified. "Oh God, Ness, what have I done? I am so sorry. Have I harmed you? Are you alright?"

The moment he said it I saw it in his eyes and wanted to ease his discomfort again. I reached for him and drew him closer. There we sat, cross-legged on the bed facing each other, our hands clasped together. "Physically I am fine, but I need to know what just happened."

I waited patiently, running my thumbs across the back of his hands. He was so still I wondered if he breathed. Then he said in the most defeated voice I had ever heard "I have sought solace by losing myself in the physical. It is all I have ever known to help when the black rises within and threatens to swallow me whole."

I swallowed the rising fear this statement engendered and continued to stroke his hands. I was terrified that I would lose him. Still, I took a deep breath and forged on. "But it hasn't helped, not really. Not ever."

He raised his eyes to my face and tilted his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"Jacob, I do not know what darkness haunts you, but I do know that although you try to bury it in mindless, soulless tupping you have never succeeded."

Confusion marred his features. "And what would you know of it?" he asked defensively.

"I have only watched you since I was a child repeating the pattern over and over again, and still needing more."

"More?"

"Jacob," I said leaning into him, "how many nights did I watch you go above stairs for your release only to have you return for another dove, and another go? How many times did you attempt to find solace there only to leave them and come to find me? Hundreds? Thousands?"

His mouth opened and closed a few times before he winced, closing his eyes and confessing "I didn't think you knew what I was doing?"

"Jacob, I grew up in a brothel. How long do you think it took me to understand our business?"

His eyes grew large and his cheeks flushed. "How old were you when you realized…?"

"Eight. You were away in the country for weeks and I had no one to keep me company. I snuck up the back stairs and watched the doves and their callers."

"Why did you never tell me?"

It was my turn to blush. Of course I knew what he was doing above stairs, but I knew that I was too young for him to have an interest in me for such sport. I simply overlooked it and enjoyed our time together. It wasn't until I was fourteen that I began to understand that the act could be associated with love. Then I thought to bide my time until he fell in love with me and left the doves behind, but I could hardly confess that.

"It was something separate from you and me. I knew it was not what you wanted from me, and besides, I liked being your more."

"What do you mean 'more'?" he asked obviously confused.

This was what I had held onto for years. That I was Jacob's 'more.' That no matter whom he might share his body with it was his heart, his mind, and his soul he shared with me. In the past week he had shared it all. I wanted it all, and I was determined to settle for nothing less.

"Well, I have always thought that if you had been satisfied with what you did above stairs with the doves you would have behaved as their other callers did. You know, rolled over and found slumber. You never stayed with them though. You always seemed to need… more. Otherwise you would never have come to find me all those nights.

Then when we lay together, you stayed. You remained my friend, and my confidant. I knew that it was me you wanted in your bed because you made sure I knew you still valued what we had shared outside the bedroom. That is until just now. I don't know what changed, but I would have sworn you had no clue that it was me beneath you."

His eyes darted about the room and his hands trembled in mine. "Today I saw the woman who took my innocence. I do not mean simply the first woman to bed me, although she was that, but the woman who opened a wound so deep that I thought to bleed to death."

Although I was frightened by his words I sat as still as I could and stroked his hands as I had been since we began to talk.

"She had been my cousin's Mistress and when he threw her over she seduced me. She made me believe that she cared for me. I had lost my mother two years earlier. My father had turned from me. I was lonely, and lost. My cousin, Sam had taken me under his wing, but then he fell in love and once again I was cast aside and left without... well, without.

Leah recognized my desperation and longing and played up the idea that she would be there for me when no one else would. She flattered me. She groomed me. She made me feel that I mattered. Then she proved that I was no more than a means for her to lash out at Sam. She justified her actions by claiming that she loved him." His breathing was rapid and his hands trembled in mine. Then I looked at his face and saw heartbreak. A tear rolled down his cheek.

My heart broke for him. In that moment I saw the boy who had lost his parents, the youth who had lost his innocence, and the man who had, at times, lost himself. Without another thought I released his hands and pulled him into an embrace. He was stiff in my arms, but I began to stroke his back in soothing circles and rocking him back and forth.

"I am so sorry that you were treated so. You must have felt so alone. Was that what you were trying to do… before? When you…" It was too horrible to give voice.

He shuddered beneath me. "It is what I have always done." He swallowed hard. "I never meant to…"

"Treat me like a dove?"

"God's teeth did I?" he leaned to see my face. When his eyes met mine I knew he could see the truth. "I did. I have treated you the way I always feared you would be treated." In that moment I watched his self-loathing nearly break him.

I could not bear the look in his eyes. I loved him and wanted him to know that he was worthy of that love. So I stopped his self-flagellation with a kiss. He was tentative and withdrawn, but I caressed his lips with mine. I cupped his face in my hands and I willed him to know that I loved him. He began to relax into the kiss and I pressed my advantage. I parted his lips with my tongue.

Almost at once Jacob tried to take more, but I crawled on top of him and pinned his arms at his sides. "No, no, tonight is about you. There are only two things I insist upon," I told him as I kissed his neck and chin. "Firstly, you must not close your eyes, and second, you must remember the entire time who is giving you this."

His breath caught, so I lifted my head and looked him straight in the eye. "If you are afraid of the darkness, think of me as your candle. I will shine a light so that you know you are not in it alone. Give me this night to try. If you still want to lose yourself…" my voice caught as I forced myself to make the promise to both myself and him. "Then I will set you free, I swear."

He looked at me with doubt. I was unsure of his concern, but I knew he was debating with himself. I so wanted to lead him to the light of love, but I could not do it without his assistance. I also knew I could not live with being no more to him than a body, detached and unimportant. I waited for his answer. Finally he nodded tentatively.

I worshiped his body with my hands, my lips, and my tongue. I tried to pour every ounce of love into each touch, each kiss, each breath. I pleasured him as best I could. Finally taking his manhood into my mouth and welcoming him within the moist confines. The entire time I looked into his eyes. There were moments when his eyes would drift closed and I would stop my ministrations, and wait. In a moment they would fly open and search out my face again. When I brought him to the brink of release I grasped his hands in my own and locked eyes with him. He arched off the bed and I urged him on with my lips, tongue and throat. I willed him to realize that this was love. As he tumbled over the edge and poured his essence down my throat he cried out my name. I kissed my way back up his frame and kissed his neck and cheeks. Then I wrapped myself around him.

He drifted into a deep sleep. Sometime, many hours later he spoke in the darkness, his voice ragged and laced with fear. "You won't leave me, will you Ness?"

"As long as you never again treat me as a dove, I am yours forever," I swore.

"Forever," he breathed into the night. A few moments later his breathing evened out again and he slept in my arms.

"Forever," I repeated as I joined him in slumber.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

JPOV

My hands were trembling and even when the laces were untied it was with shaking hands that I slid the gown from the girl's shoulders. She stepped out of it and waited for me to divest her of her stays. My frustration was rising, the black consuming me, so I all but ripped the garment off. As she pulled her shift over her head I quickly shed my own confining clothes. I needed to be buried deep within her, to quiet the voices in my head which tortured my fevered brain.

_No one wants you! They all desert you at the first opportunity. You know it's true._

I growled to drown them out and lifted the girl tossing her to the center of the bed. This would go faster without falling from it. I knew that to prepare the girl a few kisses and some manual stimulation was required. I did not wish to abuse her body I simply wanted to ease my way into oblivion. I knew that the rush of adrenaline within my veins would quiet the demons, if only for a little while, and I needed to lose myself in the physical. It was imperative that I get out of my head.

I kissed her as a matter of course, closed my eyes and attempted to find the oblivion I so desperately sought. I parted the girl's thighs with determined movements and cupped her womanhood. I stroked the girl's folds and pressed my advantage to find her bud. It took a moment, but soon enough her body began to provide moisture which would ease my way. Sam had drummed into my head that even doves deserved some kindness. He insisted that I remember that no matter my need I should never cause them harm. To assure myself that her body was prepared to accept me I slid a finger into her moist sheath. Ah, yes. Now I could find my distraction, the unconsciousness that I required. I took my manhood in hand and gathered the girl's wetness on its head to ease my way. In a moment I was seated within the center of her warmth. Here I felt surrounded. Here I knew the comfort of an embrace.

I felt tiny hands cup my face and felt myself being pulled back to the here and now. I could not allow that. I needed to be anywhere but within myself. I needed the girl to allow me to get my release without interference. Ignoring the sensation of her touch I began to move within her with a singular determination. Again, small hands tried to soothe and soft lips brushed my chin and cheeks, but I shook them off.

_There is no real affection for you. Love is a lie. You know it is. It lures you in and shreds your soul until pain is all you can feel. _

Again the hands attempted to penetrate my perfect oblivion, this time I grabbed her wrists and lifted them above the girl's head, clasping both wrists within one of my hands. I held her firmly; I would brook no interference with the reaching of my goal.

I began to thrust in a way I knew would start the fire burning within my veins, hard and fast, until I felt my release begin to build. I longed for the burn that would come from the fire of climax. I knew the blood that would rush in my ears would drown the taunts that screamed there.

_Go ahead and try to find your comfort in this. This is all you will ever have. Never love. Never more. No one will care more. You do not deserve more. You are not worth loving. Even your own mother could not love you._

"Jacob…"

That was not one of the demon voices. That voice was sweet and gentle. It called to me somewhere deeper than the darkness.

_No, do not deceive yourself. You know what you need. Do not allow yourself to be distracted._

I grunted at the voices and tried to proceed. The girl twisted beneath me and pulled at the hand with which I held her wrists. What was wrong with this girl? She should know her role here. I asked nothing except that she be a willing receptacle for my lust.

"Jacob, stop this! Stop!"

Nessie, that was Nessie's voice and I registered her distress. What was she doing here? She belonged downstairs. I was not ready for her sweetness yet. I had to burn off the anger and the fear before I faced her. She deserved so much better than the beast that rutted with the doves.

But if she was here… she would see.

I opened my eyes, but this wasn't right. I looked down expecting to see the dove I was tupping, but the face was Nessie's. I sprang back. My skin excoriated wherever it touched her. I felt sick. This could not be happening. My heart nearly beat out of my chest and my lungs burned as I desperately tried to catch my breath.

_You see. You even hurt the one person you swore to protect. You are not worthy of love._

"Are you going to tell me what that was all about?" Ness demanded.

I turned to face her. There she was, my beautiful bird, wrapped in the counter plain and looking at me with fear and apprehension. Holy God, what had I done? I buried my face in my hands and scrubbed it with my palms. Perhaps it was an illusion. Maybe I could will it not to be real. That was it. I was so fevered after seeing Leah that I had lost touch with reality. I would look again and know that Ness was safe, and that I had not exposed my darkest self to the one person on earth who thought I was a good man. I looked again and every hope I had died "Oh God, Ness, what have I done? I am so sorry. Have I harmed you? Are you alright?"

In a moment beyond reason she reached for me and drew me toward her. There we sat, cross-legged on the bed facing each other, our hands clasped together. "Physically I am fine, but I need to know what just happened," she said in a calm, steady voice.

She watched me with such steadfast calm that I knew I must make my confession as honestly as I could. I had never spoken of this. Not to anyone. Not even Carlisle. He had tried, God knew, to convince me that I did not have to live my life without attachment and affection. I could not even bring myself to look as her as I said "I have sought solace by losing myself in the physical. It is all I have ever known to help when the black rises within and threatens to swallow me whole." Just voicing it I felt it rising again.

"But it hasn't helped, not really. Not ever."

I raised my eyes to her face, stunned by her statement. "What do you mean?"

"Jacob, I do not know what darkness haunts you, but I do know that although you try to bury it in mindless, soulless tupping you have never succeeded."

Whatever did she mean by that? "And what would you know of it?"

"I have only watched you since I was a child repeating the pattern over and over again, and still needing more."

Her words echoed my own thoughts. It was as if she could read my mind and knew that I was unworthy of anything more. "More?"

"Jacob," she said gently, "how many nights did I watch you go above stairs for your release only to have you return for another dove, and another go? How many times did you attempt to find solace there only to leave them and come to find me? Hundreds? Thousands?"

She knew. I thought no one knew. Well, Jasper suspected, as did Edward. Carlisle knew I frequented the brothels, but he never said anything about it. "I didn't think you knew what I was doing?"

She explained how she had learned the business of the brothel at a young age. It broke my heart to know that bit of innocence had been robbed from her early.

"It was something separate from you and me. I knew it was not what you wanted from me, and besides, I liked being your more."

"What do you mean 'more'?" I asked confused.

"Well, I have always thought that if you had been satisfied with what you did above stairs with the doves you would have behaved as their other callers did. You know, rolled over and found slumber. You never stayed with them though. You always seemed to need… more. Otherwise you would never have come to find me all those nights.

Then when we lay together, you stayed. You remained my friend, and my confidant. I knew that it was me you wanted in your bed because you made sure I knew you still valued what we had shared outside the bedroom. That is until just now. I don't know what changed, but I would have sworn you had no clue that it was me beneath you."

My eyes darted about the room and my hands trembled. I had treated her as I had always treated the doves. I owed her better. So I confessed. "Today I saw the woman who took my innocence. I do not mean simply the first woman to bed me, although she was that, but the woman who opened a wound so deep that I thought to bleed to death."

I wove the tale, telling her all my shame and realizing what a wretch I truly was. I had felt the panic of losing all those I loved again, and turned to the only solace I had ever known. Except I had never truly found solace in the act. I had found solace only in the company of this remarkable creature.

Even in all this she reached out to me in gentleness and comforted me. "I am so sorry that you were treated so. You must have felt so alone. Was that what you were trying to do… before? When you…"

"It is what I have always done. I never meant to…" Holy God what had I done?

"Treat me like a dove?"

"God's teeth did I?" I leaned to take in her visage. When her eyes met mine I knew the truth. "I did. I have treated you the way I always feared you would be treated." I felt the bile rise in my throat and almost emptied my stomach.

I was a rouge, a rakehell. I had become exactly what I had tried to protect her from. In an instant all my hard work had been for naught. I had proven that the only one Nessie required protection from was me. How could I trap her in a situation that would neither honor nor protect her? I was nothing and she deserved everything.

Out of nowhere, she leaned in and kissed my lips. My passion was at once enflamed and I tried to lower her to the bed, I hoped to make it up to her, but she shook her head.

"No, no, tonight is about you. There are only two things I insist upon, firstly, you must not close your eyes, and second, you must remember the entire time who is giving you this."

My breath caught, but she looked me straight in the eye. "If you are afraid of the darkness, think of me as your candle. I will shine a light so that you know you are not in it alone. Give me this night to try. If you still want to lose yourself…Then I will set you free, I swear."

I was gobsmacked. She meant to leave me. She meant to abandon me. Or did she? Her open features seemed to offer me something, though I knew not what. I looked deeply into her eyes and in that instant I saw hope.

She worshiped my body with her hands, her lips, and her tongue. It was hypnotic. We communicated without a word. She took my sounds as her guides. If I sighed she pursued that which has caused it. If I moaned she beamed and worked for a repeat. It was tortuous, and heavenly all in one. Finally she took my straining manhood into her mouth and welcomed me within the moist confines. The entire time she stared into my eyes. There were moments when the pleasure overwhelmed me and my eyes would drift closed. Instantly Ness would stop her ministrations, and wait. In a moment they would fly open again and search out her face.

Her lips and tongue bathed my shaft in warm wet strokes. She expertly milked my pleasure from the very depths of my soul, and all the while she held my gaze. There was not an instant that I did not know that it was Ness who brought me this joy. Ness who knew my body so well she could bring me to the brink, again and again. At last, I could not hold back. I arched off the bed and she urged me on with her lips, tongue and throat. As I tumbled over the edge and poured my essence down her throat he cried out her name. She kissed her way back up my frame and kissed my neck and cheeks. Then she wrapped herself around me.

_I was walking on my father's estate. I knew the place well. My feet had trod_ _here many times before. There I stood, looking over my mother's grave. Next to it was a new stone, that of my father. My blood ran cold in my veins. Alone, I was alone. _

_Those who were supposed to love me had again left me alone. I looked around. No family, no wife, no children. No Ness!_

I sat bolt upright and gasped for air. My arms were around her, she was here, for now. But what would happen if she were gone? No, I had to ensure that she would remain. "You won't leave me, will you Ness?"

"As long as you never again treat me as a dove, I am yours forever," she swore.

"Forever," I breathed into the night. A prayer for safety, a prayer for comfort, and in return I would be what she needed me to be, I swore. She must be mine forever.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

NPOV

I awoke to the furnace that was Jacob, wrapped around me. The sun was sinking and my stomach was reminding me just how empty it was. I slipped from his arms, donned a dressing gown and went to the writing table in the dressing room. I penned a short missive to Alice begging her indulgence and assuring her that all was well, and that I would explain more on the morrow.

I also asked for a light supper to be sent to the room. I confessed that Jacob's state of mind was a bit tenuous, and that I needed a bit more time to ensure that we were both calm and collected for the dinner with his father tomorrow.

I rang the bell and handed the note to Jane. I explained that I wanted supper brought up on a cart to the dressing room and that she should knock and then leave it to me.

I snuck back into the bed chamber and quietly made my way to the side of the bed. I meant to slip back into it unnoticed, but before I could an arm snaked out and dragged me off my feet. I laughed as Jacob pulled my back to his front. I laughed as the air rushed from my lungs. I tried to move away, but he locked his arms about me, tightly.

"Where were you?" he asked.

"Well someone had to make our excuses to Alice, and seeing as you were clothed in slumber, I took it upon myself. I also ordered us some supper. I do not know about you, but I am feeling a bit peckish," I said between giggles.

"You are very good, Little Bird."

"I do try," I said turning in his arms and kissing him lightly. "Are you awake now?"

"I was awake almost the instant you left the bed."

"Oh. I am sorry; I thought to arrange things without disturbing you. Forgive me?"

"Anything. I felt the lack of your presence and reached for you. I do not like sleeping without you." As he said it his face took on the appearance of a little boy, pouting about the loss of a toy. I smiled, because he was charming.

"You do not have to sleep without me, as long as you can live with our agreement," I said placing a chaste kiss upon his plumb lips. "Was what we shared earlier an acceptable alternative to chasing your blind release?"

I held my breath praying that he would choose us, choose me. He looked thoughtful and his fingers skimmed the skin upon my cheek.

"I believe it requires further investigation."

He drew me to him and kissed me with a passion that I craved. His lips slid down my chin and across the column of my neck with warm wet kiss that enflamed my senses. Meanwhile, his hands found the tie at my waist and slipped it from its knot. Then he spread the dressing gown open to expose me to his hands, his lips, and his tongue.

He took my turgid peak between his lips and sucked at my breast sending the most delicious sensations to my liquid center. All the while his eyes held my gaze, just as I had done with him. It made each act he performed more intimate, more faithful, more loving. I became molten in his hands and reached fulfillment from his mouth at my breast alone. His eyes burned into mine and I dreamt that he was sending the same message to me that I had tried to send him the night before.

Could this be anything but love? It could not for me. That thought sent me even higher as he covered me with his warmth and pierced my womanhood with his shaft. It felt so amazing that I came up off the bed to meet him and our lips met in a kiss which stifled our mutual exultation. When he broke the kiss he looked deeply into my eyes and watched the effect he had on my body, my mind, my very soul. I blushed under his scrutiny and made to turn my face from his direct view, but he took my chin in his hand and held it firm.

"Do not hide from me, Little Bird. You said we would not close our eyes to each other, and I wish to see you shatter for me. Please…"

The vulnerable look in his eyes touched my very heart and I nodded. He began to move in earnest then and reached a hand between us to work my bud as he plunged into my warmth. My pleasure grew exponentially and I was soaring higher than I ever imagined. Then I touched the sun and shattered into a million shards of shimmering glass which cascaded down reflecting light from every facet. All the while Jacob was with me, holding me, guiding me, easing me into his loving embrace. When we landed upon the bed he kissed me again and I knew there was no other being on earth or in heaven with whom I wanted to share this.

"So you wish to continue? You want this?" I asked breathlessly.

"How could I choose anything but what we have shared?"

"I do not know, but it is not I who lost myself in mindless tupping. I have never been with another, there is no one else to think of when my eyes are closed," I defended.

"No one? Do you mean to tell me that you have never lost your heart? No one ever touched you to the core of your being?" he said with a small smile.

Sheer dread filled my heart. How could I explain that only he had ever touched me so? His father and his friends had all advised me not to confess my adoration to him. Still I would not lie to him. We were to be married, and a life based on lies could not be strong.

"I never said that. I simply said that no man has ever had me like this. I have no one with whom to compare you."

"You think that is what I am doing when I close my eyes? Comparing you to my past?" he said aghast. "That is not it at all."

"I thought you were pretending to have your way with the woman who had hurt you."

He shook his head sadly. "Never. I was simply trying to burn her memory from my brain. If I felt the rush that pleasure brings I did not have to acknowledge the memories that haunt me."

"Memories can be painful, it is true, but even those that at first brought pain can bring comfort when viewed through another lens."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," I began knowing that my tale was about him, "there was a time when I lost someone I loved very much. I cried myself to sleep for months, but then one of the doves, Bree, told me to look at the situation differently. She said if I truly cared for this man that I should be pleased that he was happy and wish him joy."

Jacob tilted his head and stared at me. He looked quite agitated and said, "Who is this man? When did you love him? How did he hurt you?"

"He was a gentleman who frequented the doves for a time. He was kind to me, and I grew to care for him very much. I thought we were friends," I said remembering how disillusioned I had felt when he disappeared from my life for the span of three seasons. "He chose a mistress for himself, and I did not see him for nearly nine months. There was no note, no letter, not even a goodbye. I only knew of his taking a mistress because of the scandal sheets."

I heard my voice catch as the emotion of that time welled within my breast anew. "Bree told me that I should not begrudge him comfort no matter where he found it. She said that if I truly loved him then I would want only the best for him, regardless of whether it was with me or not. And truth be told I was far too young for that role."

He eyed me suspiciously. "And you never saw this man again?"

My eyes flew about the room. I could not deny the truth, yet I must protect his identity. "I did. He returned after about a nine month. He spent some time with me, not much, but he did see me a few times. Then he disappeared again."

"And you came to understand that he was not worth your affection?" he asked in what almost seemed a hopeful manner.

"Quite the contrary," I said defending the man he had been. "I found that he remained kind and good, and that he still held some regard for me. He made me hope that when I grew I might hold some interest for him. It was all that sustained me when he departed again."

"The fool left you again, and still you speak so softly of him?" he snapped.

I lifted a hand to his cheek, knowing that it was of him I spoke and not wanting him to judge himself so harshly. "He was quite troubled when he returned. He was struggling with a decision and came for council."

"He asked this of a child?" he said his face marred with disbelief.

"He asked this of a friend whose opinion he seemed to value, although, I do not recall actually giving any advice. He seemed to find what he needed." I said sadly.

"And he decided to leave you again? You are well shod of the cad."

"He was not a cad. He was a man, like any other. Well, perhaps a bit better. He went off to fight Bonaparte within the week. I did not understand his choice to leave with no real farewell, but at least he sent a farewell this time."

"Did he return from the war?"

"He did."

"So he is still about London? You said he was a gentleman. Does that mean you could run into him in the street? If he came to call would you fly away with him?" he sat up and held my shoulders win his hands a look of panic upon his face.

"Jacob," I soothed, "I have given you my pledge. I will take vows in a week and be yours alone forever. Was that not our agreement?"

"It was, but I will not share your affection. Do you hear me? You are to be mine and no other's."

"I would have it no other way," I swore.

He pulled me into his arms and sealed the deal by taking me again and again until we heard the soft knock upon the dressing room door. He pulled the coverlet over me and went to fetch our supper. He wheeled in a cart containing roast beef, Yorkshire puddings and gravy, boiled parsnips, and a bottle of wine.

He carved the meat and served me a plate. I smiled. He was forever spoiling me, and I felt cared for when he did. "Jacob, you asked if I would leave you for anyone, but what of you? Your former love is a lady in good standing, is she not? Might she be met in society? Might she not choose you again?"

The thought terrified me. I was devoted to him, but if he loved elsewhere… I could not bear the thought.

"I hate her. Were she to think of coming near me I would be physically ill. No, sweet, we have a deal. You and I shall be forever a pair. We shall enjoy the delights of a physical relationship even in the confines of matrimony, and you shall bear my offspring and my heirs. In return for this I shall see you lack for nothing. A terribly civil arrangement, wouldn't you say?"

There was something in the way he said 'civilized arrangement' that made my blood run cold. I did not want an arrangement, I wanted a love. I was devoted to him and his happiness. Was that his aim as well? And if so why not state it?

We shared the meal and kisses between bites. He cleared the dishes and cart, and returned to bed. We coupled once more before we both fell into exhausted slumber.

Somewhere in the night I awoke to find Jacob's arms like a vice around me. I tried to loosen his grip, but he simply tightened it. So I lay in the circle of his embrace and lifted a payer to God.

I begged that he would come to care for me as I cared for him. I beseeched Him to allow me this one wish, and in return I swore I would ask for nothing else in my life. I fell asleep again thinking of the miracle I had requested and the hope that God would grant it.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

JPOV

Night fell hard. Blackness filled not only the sky, but my soul as well. Here I held the most wonderful creature in my arms. She was warm and sated, and snuggled into me like a contented kitten. The glow of the banking fire lit her copper hair and I was alone with her, safe from the outside world.

Her story had hit me like a clenched fist. I was so used to the idea of Ness being my own little bird that it never occurred to me that other gentlemen who frequented Mrs. Cope's would notice her, but then, why not? She was a lovely child, polite and well spoken. She was always about, fetching drinks or singing in the lounge. Why wouldn't they notice her?

Still, it chafed to think that some other man had paid her attention only to cause her pain with his departure, and not once, but twice. She was so guileless, so honest, only a fool would miss the softness of her face when she spoke of him. Only a blagguard would wound so innocent a soul. I could kill the man with my bare hands.

Yet, if I was honest with myself, it was not only he with whom I was annoyed. I was angry. I felt a bit betrayed by Nessie as well. How could she hold someone else in such affection and agree to wed me? Would the pull of that affection result in the possibility of losing her? I had chosen her for the sole reason that she was stable and steady and that I would not need to concern myself with the anguish of loss yet again.

How could this be, after confessing my wounds to her and having her propose a bargain which would ensure us both what we needed from this merger, how could she now tell me that she loved another? More importantly, why did it disquiet me so? It was not as if I was in love with her. I cared for Ness. I worried about her future and wanted nothing but the best for her, but I was not a fool. I had had far too many examples of how loving someone meant losing them. I would not risk losing her and certainly not to some mentally deficient imbecile who would treat her with such reckless disregard.

Yesterday had proved a remarkable thing, having Nessie in my arms, and knowing that it was she who quieted the demons in my head. How could I be assaulted with doubts when Ness filled me with the most exquisite hope of a bright and happy future? She asked only that I not treat her as a dove. Knowing that she had this power within her, I would never require the services of a dove again. Not a one of them had ever made me feel safe and cared for as she had.

The warmth of her arms as I slept kept me grounded. The welcome of her lips taught me the hope of being accepted. Her willingness to take in my manhood with sweet abandon made me feel recognized and wanted. All the things I had lost from those who had claimed to love me in the past.

She was everything I wanted and more, everything I needed in my lonely life. She would be there no matter what. Had she not proved it by remaining with me even after I had treated her so abominably? She promised she would stay with me. I would hold her to that promise.

In seven days we would be wed and then she would swear it before God. Seven days, a mere week. Still a lot could happen in seven days. She could run into her love in the London streets. He could see how beautiful she had grown. He could decide to pursue her and she could go with him. She was free until I slipped that ring upon her finger. Seven days was too long.

Father was coming to dine this evening. He had already approved the match. All our friends would be present. Why not arrange for the vicar to perform the ceremony here, this very evening? What was left to arrange? We had the license, we had the vicar… Alice had provided the trousseau. A ring! I needed a ring to give Ness as a symbol of our union. I also needed to arrange the wedding trip. I would have to discuss with Alice and Jasper how quickly these few items could be taken care of before I could actually carry Ness away and out of London as my bride.

Tonight was not possible, but it needed to be soon. That was all there was to it.

As the morning light broke in the east I felt Nessie's tiny hands skim across my chest. I pulled her to me tightly and kissed her neck as I drew her upward. "Good morning, my sweet."

She blushed at the endearment and smiled that gleaming smile. "Good day."

"I hate to do it, but I must leave you today to the whims of Alice as I have some important errands to run." I explained.

"Errands?"

"Yes, nothing with which you need concern yourself, simply some further arrangements to… well, arrange."

She nodded and we slipped from the bed to begin our morning ablutions. In three quarters of an hour we were both ready to descend the stairs together and face the day. We found Jasper and Alice in an affectionate embrace and I cleared my throat to make them aware of our presence.

Alice blushed and stepped away from her husband, but Jasper just beamed and winked. We all sat down to break our fasts and I began to arrange for Jasper to accompany me on my missions. Still, I needed a moment or two alone with Alice, as well.

"I am free to go with you, Jacob, for most of the day, but I do need to make a stop in town to arrange for a delivery. That is unless you are in need of any assistance from me for this evening, my love?"

"Not to worry, Jasper, Nessie and I have everything under control, and Bella, Rose, and Esme will be arriving for tea and remaining until you and their gentlemen arrive for dinner. By the by, are you going to accompany Sir William here this evening, Jacob? We cannot let him think you are residing here with Ness," Alice pointed out.

I had not considered that, and was grateful that Alice always paid attention to these details. "I shall transport him in my Barouche; I planned to visit him this afternoon anyway. What an excellent suggestion."

"I am glad you approve," she beamed.

"Do you think I might have a moment of your time before we depart? I have a question for you."

"Certainly, would you two excuse us?" Alice said to Ness and Jasper.

They both nodded and I followed Alice to her personal drawing room. She led me to the settee and sat across from me. "Is everything alright? You truly frightened me yesterday. I had no idea what might transpire between you and Ness after seeing the desperation in your eyes"

"Everything is… fine. I had an upsetting encounter in town and I required Ness to help me calm myself," I fudged.

"Carlisle said that I needed to let you and her work things out alone, but that he had faith that all would come to a satisfactory conclusion. You both seem well this morning."

"We are indeed, but I was wondering how soon you think we could have our wedding. I want Ness and I bound to each other under the law as soon as possible. I do not wish to wait."

"Why the hurry? There are only a few more days until we have planned your nuptials. Is something wrong?" she asked concernedly.

"I do not wish to spend a moment longer than necessary before Ness and I are united before God and the world."

Alice smiled. "I knew you would see reason. I just knew you would fall in love with her."

I thought about disillusioning her, but realized that knowing Alice, if she thought my urgency was motivated by love she was much more likely to assist me, I did not.

"I will talk with the girls. It might be possible to move things up to Wednesday. Will that do?"

"I suppose it must. Please do not tell Ness just yet. I do not wish to disappoint her if we cannot make it happen."

"It shall be our secret."

"Thank you Alice."

With that settled, Jasper and I headed out to accomplish some other things. "Jazz I am in need of some advice."

"I am at your disposal."

"I need to purchase a ring for Renesmee. I have always farmed such purchases out to Bertie, but it seems wrong to do so as regards my future wife's wedding ring. Have you any suggestions as to jewelers?"

"I have one I frequent," he offered, "but might I make a suggestion?"

"Certainly," I encouraged.

"Most gentlemen of my acquaintance utilize a family heirloom for a wedding ring. They are considered blessing rings, and cement the feeling that the woman is truly a member of your family. Alice wears my late mother's ring. Bella's ring was Esme's at one time, and Rose wears Emmett's grandmother's ring. Carlisle told me of the tradition when I attempted to buy Alice's affection with trinkets. She did not accept my suit until I gave her my mother's sapphire. What's more, no matter how many baubles I purchase for her, it is always the Whitlock diamonds that she returns to for adorning herself for a ball," he explained. "Truth be told I adore seeing her in them, too. They remind me that she is good and truly mine."

Good and truly mine. That was exactly what I wanted for Nessie. It would mean asking my father for the family jewels, but would he refuse me when I was fulfilling his request to marry? Still, I wanted to give Ness something that was hers and hers alone. Something I had chosen for her, something that would demonstrate how very much she meant to me.

I confessed such to Jasper and he gave directions to the driver to a well-appointed shop off Wimpole Street. The sign above the door read "Volturi Bros. Jewelers." We entered the heavy oak door to a plush showroom appointed in rich mahogany and dark cherry wood. A small bell chimed somewhere in the back and a fine gentleman entered from behind a draped curtain.

He was dressed in a tail-coat of blush superfine and wore a cream waistcoat intricately embroidered with threads of gold. His hair was black and silky and pulled back at the neck by a leather thong. He smiled when he saw us and bowed. "Lord Whitlock, how delightful to see you again, and who is your friend?"

"It is good to see you too, Aro. This gentleman is Lord Jacob Black and I have brought him to the finest jeweler in all of London because he is in need of something for his intended."

"Ah, a love gift, my very favorite kind. Please come with me, Gentlemen, and we shall show you our very finest offerings." He led us through the curtains to a small sitting area with large tables. Then he disappeared for a time and when he returned he had several stacked boxes in his arms. "Can you tell me, Lord Black, what kind of gift you were thinking; a necklace, a bracelet, earrings perhaps?"

"Something that she can wear always as a reminder of me," I stated.

Aro beamed. "How sentimental of you my lord. Might I make a few suggestions?"

I nodded and he began to place items on various velvet covered boards; ear bobs, bracelets, chokers, necklaces. They were each more beautiful than the last. Still nothing spoke to me until he pulled out an oval cut emerald surrounded by diamonds on a filigreed chain. It was small, delicate and it sparkled in the light just as Nessie's smile sparkled. She could wear it with the green satin, or the rose chiffon, or even the white of a wedding gown and it would look lovely with her hair. I lifted the bauble and held it to the light. There was something almost familiar about it. It gave me a sense of security to hold it in my palm and I could visualize it resting at Nessie's collarbone. In my mind I could see child's fingers playing with it as the babe was rocked by her. How strange that the vision was so clear. "I'll take it," I said.

I had Aro wrap it up for me immediately and it was tucked safely into my pocket as we left the building and headed to my father's townhouse.

Jasper begged off, saying that he had to take care of that delivery, but that he would call back before tea. I thanked him and entered my father's domicile. I was greeted by Preston who told me that father was much improved since hearing of my impending marriage and led to father's sitting room.

"Jacob," he greeted me, "how are you, son?"

"I am well, Father. I was quite pleased to get your missive, though I should protest at your method of meeting my fiancé."

"I admit it was somewhat underhanded, and I was wrong not to trust your judgment. I fear you and I have become so inept at communicating with one another that we should begin anew and forget the past entirely."

I narrowed my eyes at him. Sir William Black, the man I had admired and longed to be my entire life looked older. There was grey at his temples and lines at his eyes. He was still an imposing figure, but he no longer seemed invincible. Of course, I had known he was fallible from the time I was fourteen. I had seen him crumble when faced with the loss of my mother. Still, he now seemed so much smaller than I remembered. Could we truly forget the past? He could, I was certain. It would be so easy for him to forget how he and my mother threw me away, chose to abandon me, and how when given the chance to accept me back he had turned his back on me. It would not be so easy for me to forget, however.

"I do not wish to argue with you any longer, Father. I truly hope we can learn to be better to each other."

"Come, sit," he directed me. I took a seat near him and he smiled. "I have something for you, my boy." He lifted a carved wooden casket that I recognized as housing my mother's jewels. "I want you to have these to present to your wife. They are the Black jewels and your mother always dreamed of a time when you could pass them on."

I took the box and admired the intricate carving upon it. It depicted a scene of a lone wolf baying at the moon. It was stained and finished with a large brass closure. "I have always wondered where you found such an exquisite piece."

"I carved it myself, as a wedding gift to your mother. I wanted to give her something from the heart."

"I did not know you could carve with such skill," I confessed, yet another thing I did not know about my father. "I too carve wood, although I do not think I have ever made anything with as much expertise as this."

He smiled at me as if pleased that we shared the hobby. I felt a chill in my gut. This was too much, talking with him about things we didn't know about each other and pretending that the reason we did not know was happenstance.

"I also wished to ask something of you." He had the good grace to look sheepish as he said it. "I thought you might give Renesmee your mother's ring as a token. He opened his hand, it contained a ring box and he handed it to me.

It took everything within me to steady my hand as it held the box. I opened the lid and almost fell from the chair. There upon the velvet sat a beautiful oval cut emerald surrounded by diamonds. It looked almost exactly like the jewel I had just purchased for Ness. My breath caught. I could not have told you that my mother's ring resembled it so, but suddenly I felt closer to the woman I had lost so long ago.

"Thank you," I said through a thick tongue. I swallowed hard and closed the box. "I wanted to tell you that I hope to move the wedding up a few days."

"Is something amiss?"

"No," I said defensively "I simply do not wish to waste another moment before Ness is well and truly mine."

He smiled indulgently and nodded. "Take her to Wolf's Bridge. I will arrange to have it all ready for the two of you. Then return here for Christmas. Will you?"

I knew he wanted us under his roof. It felt so odd for him to ask me for my approval that I hesitated a moment. Although I did not like the house, it would mean I could keep an eye on his health, and that Ness could see to it that he became invested in our lives. "Yes, thank you, Father."

"Thank you, my boy. You have made me happier than I have been in far too many years."

Happy… Yes, I wanted him happy. I wanted Ness happy, and in all that I wanted a modicum of happiness for myself. If only I could believe it would last…


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

NPOV

The morning was spent finalizing the preparations for the evening's festivities. I had no idea how much went into planning such an event. By all rights I should have been paying particular attention so as to learn the art of hostessing, but in truth my mind was otherwise occupied.

I was replaying the events of last evening over and over. Remembering the heartbreaking look on Jacob's face made me inattentive. He had looked so lost, so alone. I was determined that he would never feel that again. I would love him so well that he would never have cause to feel alone again. I would make him see that as long as we were there for each other no one and nothing could ever hurt us again.

Sometime after noon our friends began to arrive with their lady's maids and their dinner clothes. We retired to the golden sitting room to talk and enjoy some quiet time before the evening festivities.

"Did the wedding clothes arrive yet?" Bella asked Alice.

"Yes, Mdm. Baptiste had them delivered today," Alice answered turning to smile at me. "You will be a beautiful bride, Ness. Rose, did you get my note this morning?"

"I did," Rose beamed, "and it is all arranged, just as you asked."

"Excellent!" Alice said clapping lightly. "We will be able to tell him this evening, and proceed with the plan."

"What plan?" I inquired.

"Oh," Bella said turning to Alice as if seeking approval. Alice nodded and Bella continued. "We are finishing plans for the wedding ceremony and the wedding breakfast."

"Breakfast?" I asked.

"Well, seeing as this is a smaller than usual wedding…"

"Is it?"

"Well, generally when a future Duke weds it is a large and public affair attended by much of the ton. The time frame that Sir William imposed was bound to hurry the process; although I am certain he would have allowed for a longer engagement should Jacob have chosen a well-known daughter of the ton," Esme clarified.

"It would not have mattered what Sir William allowed," Alice giggled.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Jacob is determined to wed you in as expedient a manner as possible. He is chomping at the bit to make you his wife."

"He is anxious to meet his father's edict," I explained.

"It is so much more than that," Bella observed. "He made it quite clear to us that he was impatient to have the ceremony performed."

"Really?"

"In fact…" Bella began.

"Bella," Alice interjected, "we are not authorized to divulge that."

"Oh posh!" Rosalie said dismissively. "I made no such vow. If he wishes to scold me for speaking the truth, so be it. Ness deserves to know."

"Know what?" I asked impatiently.

"Jacob confessed that were it possible he would marry you on the morrow and has enlisted us all in hurrying the process so you and he can be wed in a mere matter of days," Rose blurted out.

I looked from each of the lady's faces to the next. They all seemed excited and happy. This news was so unexpected. Still, after last evening, was his urgency because I had made my feelings for him clear? Did this mean that he wanted us as desperately as I did? I dared not hope.

"Did he say why he wished to hurry the ceremony?" I asked, anxiety knotting in my belly.

"Well…" Alice began, "let us say that when I asked if he was that in love with you, he did not dispute my statement."

"Truly?" I said breathily.

"Truly. Now, when he discusses it with you this evening, you must pretend that you know nothing of it. Else he will never confide in us again, and that would not do."

I vowed that their secret was safe.

"Now, as to the wedding breakfast, we have invited several prominent families to attend and be introduced to you as Jacob's bride. It will make for an easier transition into society for you," Rose explained.

"Since you will be away on your wedding trip for several weeks those who have met you will have to opportunity to talk you up and increase interest in meeting you so that when you return for the Christmas holiday and attend the Annual Christmas ball at Lord and Lady Swan's everyone will be buzzing in anticipation," Alice said a gleam of triumph in her eyes.

"Away? Wedding trip? Heavens is there so much to do in so short a time?"

"Oh, Renesmee, the wedding trip is the best part. Jacob will whisk you away somewhere where you two can be alone and enjoy each other's company without the distractions of family and friends to interfere. It will allow you to truly get to know each other in a much deeper way," Bella waxed poetic.

"Emmett took me to Bath," Rose said her face taking on a glow, "We stayed at his estate there and rarely left the bed."

"Rosalie!" Esme said shaking her head. "Have a care for your mother's delicate sensibilities."

Rose chortled. "Posh, you know I was delivered of Victoria only eleven months from the wedding. Those two months in Bath earned you your granddaughter."

Esme blushed, but agreed that Victoria was a real gift.

"Edward and I went to Kent. Carlisle's estate abuts Sir William's. I hope Jacob takes you to Wolf's Bridge. It is such beautiful country. I know you will love it as much as I," Bella said enthusiastically.

"As long as they return in time for your parent's ball, they can go to Scotland for all I care," Rose laughed. "It is not as if they will see much of the countryside on this trip, anyway."

I blushed and Esme sent a scalding look at her daughter. "There are times I think we made the wrong choice in allowing you to wed that hooligan of a husband."

Sometime after tea we all excused ourselves to our rooms and changed for the evening's festivities. Alice walked me to the door of my dressing room and paused. "Remember Ness, tonight you are the young lady whom Jacob is to marry, not the woman who has been sharing his bed for a week. He will be keeping his distance, as is appropriate."

I nodded, though I knew I was looking a bit forlorn. Jacob had been gone all day, and I missed him.

"Not to worry though," Alice said conspiratorially, "I have a plan to allow you two a bit of time together."

Jane was anxious to prove her prowess in dressing me for an occasion so she had consulted with Angela and had several choices laid out for me.

In the end we chose a damask silk of rose with white roses embroidered on the overlay. Jane dressed my hair softly with ringlets falling down my back. When I looked in the mirror I saw a young woman who was changing. She was more comfortable in her skin and felt cherished and welcome in her new environment. I smiled.

"You make a pretty sight, Miss," Jane said approvingly.

"Thank you Jane."

"Too bad you don't have any baubles or bobs. A lady should have jewels, I think. Makes her look as if she belongs, don't it? Mayhap you should mention it to his lordship. Almost not worth having a gentleman without the perks," Jane mused as she finished my hair.

"Jane!"

"Oh, Miss, I didn't mean nothin' by it. I swear. It's just you're so pretty. I can't help thinkin' you would blossom with jewels."

"I will simply have to do without."

In that moment the door to the dressing room opened and Jacob entered quietly closing the door behind him. He placed a finger to his lips and walked over to stand behind me in the mirror. "You are a vision, Little Bird, almost perfect in form and fashion. Almost," he said turning to Jane. "Jane, can you watch my lady's eyes and ensure they remain closed for me?"

Jane's eyes grew wide before she nodded enthusiastically and leant down to watch me. "Close yer eyes, Miss. I believe the gentleman has a surprise for you."

I eyed Jacob in the mirror. "Oh, Jacob, please do not tease me. I am like a harp strung too tightly and might break at any moment."

"Close your eyes. Come on, be a good girl. I have something that will calm your nerves and make the evening most tolerable."

I shut my eyes tightly, as requested. I felt his breath on my neck and then I heard his voice soft and husky in my ear. "In three days' time I will slip my mother's ring onto your dainty finger, thus declaring to the world that you are my lawful spouse. Until then I want you to have this," he said as I felt the fall of something about my neck and the brush of his fingers across my skin. "It should rest just above your heart, and should someone admire it you must tell them that it is your bride gift and that it means you are mine, always, from this day forward. Do you agree?" he asked.

"Oh yes," I sighed.

"Then count to ten and open your eyes and I shall meet you downstairs."

I waited the allotted time and when I opened my eyes I saw the most exquisite green stone surrounded by crystalline sparklers hanging round my neck. I audibly gasped and Jane beamed beside me.

"See, Miss, I told ye that jewels would make you perfect."

Alice had informed me that I was not to descend the stairs until she sent for me, something about needing to make an entrance. Angela came to the door and smiled. "My lady says all is ready for you, Miss."

I stood and smoothed my skirts. I walked down the stairs to find the faces of my new friends. Rose looked stunning in her evening gown standing next to her hulking husband. Emmett caught my eye and winked at me. Edward stood next to Bella, the perfect society couple. Both beamed at me. Jasper and Alice nodded in approval as I descended the stairs. I saw Esme, a look of gentle approval upon her lovely face, and Carlisle who raised a brow at me and then smiled letting me know that he too approved. Sir William stood with the assistance of a cane and bowed as I approached. Finally, I caught Jacob's eye and in a moment of delight I smiled.

He walked up to me and bowed over my hand. Then he turned to the assembled company and said "Father, friends, allow me to introduce my fiancé, Miss Renesmee Cherish."

Suddenly everyone applauded and came to greet me as if I had not seen most of them earlier. Each couple took their turn, kissed my cheek and congratulated Jacob on his excellent choice. Emmett actually said he could not believe that I had accepted Jacob, and that should I come to my senses he was willing to provide an escape.

Esme and Carlisle greeted us and embraced us both. "He could not have chosen better," Esme gushed. "Welcome to the family," Carlisle said gently squeezing my hands in his own.

Finally, Sir William approached and shook Jacob's hand. Then he turned to me and smiled. "I could not be more pleased," he said.

"Thank you, Your Grace," I responded.

"Oh, that will never do," Sir William complained taking my hand and placing it in the crook of his arm and leading me into the sitting room. "You are about to be my daughter, please call me 'Papa.'"

I turned back to look at Jacob, unsure of how to respond. He seemed confused by his father's offer, but simply shrugged his shoulders as if to say _if it makes him happy._

I sat with Sir William on the settee and the conversation flowed. After three quarters of an hour the butler called us into dinner. Sir William insisted on escorting me into dine and I was seated across from Jacob, between Edward and Emmett for the meal. Edward was convivial and quite charming company. Emmett on the other hand found great sport in finding topic which made me blush. Much of dinner was spent trying to maintain my composure. Each time Emmett made a joke at Jacob or my expense I wrapped my fingers around the gem hanging from my neck. I remembered that Jacob said it meant I was his and this eased any discomfort I had.

Jacob was within view, but conversation with him was difficult as the table was wide and Rosalie and Bella kept him occupied throughout the meal.

When dinner was finished the gentlemen excused themselves. "They are off to drink brandy and do whatever gentlemen do behind closed doors," Alice explained as we ladies moved to the conservatory for tea.

"In my experience they spend time with other men puffing and bragging," I said.

Rose turned to me in delight. "Oh, do tell. You are the only one among us who has been privy to their private conversations."

"There is not much to tell, especially as none of the gentlemen behind that door are anything like those that frequented the doves," I stated plainly.

"Even Jacob? After all, that is in fact how you met him," Rose said pointedly.

"He was never like the others. He has always been special and unique."

"Speaking of unique…" Alice segued, "That is a lovely jewel at your throat."

I blushed and my hand was again wrapped round the gem. Looking at the other women I saw the exquisite gems that graced them and thought how years ago I would have been envious. Now I had a simple green stone that I was not certain was glass and it meant so much more to me than the crown jewels. "Jacob gave it to me as a bride gift. Is it not the most beautiful thing?"

"The sweet and simple gifts are always the best, are they not?" Esme asked.

"Always," Bella said.

"I agree, but the apologies are always the most expensive," Rose laughed.

"You receive gifts for apology?" I asked.

"Jewelry… furniture… trips… it all depends on the level of the offense."

"Do your gentlemen offend often?"

"Renesmee," Esme began, "I am going to give you the only real piece of advice I have ever given my girls. As a wife you have one thing you must always remember. As long as you do, nothing can ever come between you and the man you love."

All the girls nodded and I leaned in.

"You are marrying a man. He is no more or less than that and he will on occasion be thoughtless and careless and forget from time to time how very much he needs you. It is not because he does not love you, but because he is human. When it happens, and I mean when, not if, you must remind him gently exactly how much he needs you. Do not hold grudges; do not play games, but point out what behavior has injured you. When he comes to his senses… forgive him and forget the offense. As long as you can let it go and move forward you will find happiness."

I thought back to that awful night. Jacob had injured my feelings by treating me like any other woman, but I had discussed it with him and we had moved forward. I smiled and nodded.

"That said," Esme took my hand in hers, "you must know what behavior is utterly unacceptable. I know that you have seen things, probably more than we can imagine. Never accept less than you deserve, my dear."

"Esme taught me that," Alice said. "I was so convinced that I deserved less. It was why Jasper's offer of marriage was so frightening to me. I know now that I was blameless in what James and Victoria did to me. I know that I did not deserve being thrown out by my father. It was a difficult lesson to lean, but it has made all the difference."

Bella held Alice's hand and leaned in. "I was so enamored of Edward that I was convinced he could do no wrong. We were married a little over a year when I became ill." She smiled and looked down. "Actually, I became with child. I was so tired and felt wretched for some time. Edward was not used to me not being there for him at all times. He was frightened by my illness, and I was not certain that I was indeed with child so I waited to discuss that possibility with him. He became quite petulant. He felt neglected, so he pouted. All I wanted was some sweetness and instead I got a little boy stomping his feet. In the end, I sat him down and explained what I needed and that if he could not give it to me I would go and spend some time in my mother's home, where I knew I would be pampered and cared for."

"You would leave him?"

"Not forever, but for a time to make certain he understood. In the end there was no need. He understood, and has never forgotten that occasionally everyone needs taking care of, not only him."

Finally, Rose spoke. "Emmett will tell you that I am a woman who needs a great deal of attention, and it is true. I need to know that the children and I are always his greatest priority. When I met him he followed me about like a love sick pup. I enjoyed it. But my husband is a rather notorious flirt. When he forgets to flirt with me, I remind him by allowing other men to flirt with me. It has happened only twice. This ring," she said showing me a ruby sparkler, "and this bracelet," she showed me the matching piece "are now reminders. When he is misbehaving, I flash them at him and he remembers."

"Well, Jacob and I had a… moment, recently. We discussed it, and I believe all is well."

"Just remember, should you ever need advice, a sympathetic ear, or someone to remind you that all is not lost we are all here for you," Esme vowed.

"Yes, and some of us like you better than we like him," Rose said as we all laughed.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

JPOV

Father and I rode over to the Whitlock's together. I had brought my evening clothes with me to his house because I could hardly pop upstairs and change without him realizing that I was staying in the same place as my intended. I was antsy, I had not seen Ness since this morning, and although I felt secure in the thought that we had mended the breach I still longed to hold her.

The necklace rested in a box in my lapel pocket. The more I thought about it the more perfect it seemed. Ness had no jewels and she should be gilded in the finest money could buy. I wanted her to have it for the evening, but was not certain how to get it to her. I must have been patting my pocket, for Father noticed and commented.

"What is it? Some gift for your intended?" He asked from across the carriage.

I smiled. "It is indeed. I purchased it today." I took out the box and handed it to him as he leaned against the soft squabs. He opened it and noticed its similarity to Mother's ring. His eyes misted as he looked at me.

"Your mother would have approved. It should look lovely adorning young Renesmee's neck."

"I want to give it to her for this evening. She has no jewelry of her own, and I do not want her to feel less than her friends. Alice and Bella are always understated in their adornment, but Rosalie loves her sparkle. I want Ness to know that she fits in. She is quite nervous about this evening," I confessed.

"She has nothing to be nervous about. I have already approved the match. Trusting that the ladies have been industrious you should be married in a matter of days. This should be the happiest time of her young life," my father reasoned.

"This is all so new to her. She has been wonderful, really, adjusting to meeting my friends, learning about society, and even meeting you. I worry that she will be overwhelmed. I want her to be comfortable in her new life."

He smiled. "The girl I met seems quite level headed and strong. She made it quite clear that she was ready and willing to take on this new role and that although she had much to learn she was more than up to the task. I believed her and I think you should too. She reminded me of your Mama. She was so determined to make me the best duchess, and she did."

I sighed. I remembered how my mother shone in her role as wife and duchess. She had also thrived in her role of mother, until she turned from me. She had been the perfect partner for my father. There was never a doubt that she was an asset to my father. I hoped Ness would be the same for me.

"Renesmee resides beneath the Whitlock's roof at present does she not?" he asked.

"She does."

"Then perhaps you can pop up and deliver the cadeau before the party begins."

I was shocked. Was my father suggesting I break etiquette and meet with my fiancé in her boudoir? "What?"

"Have Alice chaperone, as is right and decent, but calm the young lady's nerves and give her the gift. Take your moments when they present themselves, Jacob," he said smiling. "After all, I plan to monopolize the girl's time this evening," he teased.

I spoke to Alice when we arrived and she was delighted at the prospect of being part of presenting Ness with her fist piece of jewelry. We excused ourselves and Alice, bless her, told me she would give me ten minutes alone with Ness.

I quietly opened the door to Ness' dressing room and shut it behind me. There sat Renesmee before her vanity. She was dressed in a dress of soft rose and looked more beautiful every time I laid eyes on her. I placed a finger to my lips and walked over to stand behind her in the mirror. "You are a vision, Little Bird, almost perfect in form and fashion. Almost," I said turning to Jane. "Jane, can you watch my lady's eyes and ensure they remain closed for me?"

Jane's eyes grew wide before she nodded enthusiastically and leant down to watch Ness' eyes and ensure my surprise. "Close yer eyes, Miss. I believe the gentleman has a surprise for you," the girl instructed, beaming at me.

Ness eyed me in the mirror. "Oh, Jacob, please do not tease me. I am like a harp strung too tightly and might break at any moment."

"Close your eyes," I demanded. "Come on, be a good girl. I have something that will calm your nerves and make the evening most tolerable."

She closed her eyes and I opened the box, holding the necklace out so Jane could see. The girl nearly gave me away in her enthusiasm, but she bit her lip and vibrated with excitement.

I leaned into Nessie's ear brushing the skin behind her ear with my lips as I said "In three days' time I will slip my mother's ring onto your dainty finger, thus declaring to the world that you are my lawful spouse. Until then I want you to have this." With that I lifted the chain round her neck and the brushed my fingers across her silken skin. "It should rest just above your heart and should someone admire it you must tell them that it is your bride gift and that it means you are mine, always, from this day forward. Do you agree?"

"Oh yes," she sighed.

"Then count to ten and open your eyes and I shall meet you downstairs." I wanted to kiss her senseless and drag her off to bed, but our friends and my father awaited below. I breathed once more so her scent filled my nostrils and then I slipped from the room and returned to my father's side.

I was greeted by Edward and Bella. Edward congratulated me and Bella kissed my cheek. Emmett thumped me on the back. Jasper shook my hand. Esme hugged me and smiled. Carlisle nodded. Alice squeezed my hand. Finally Rosalie approached me and leaned into my ear "Hurt that sweet girl and you will answer to me, mutt."

"I have no intention of hurting her," I vowed.

"Good, because I think she is a gem."

At last, Alice announced that it was time for Nessie's presentation. We all waited for her at the bottom of the stairs. She stepped onto the landing and I thought my heart would beat out of my chest. There she stood. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. The light of the candles danced in her tresses and lit her cheeks. My eyes caressed her form from head to toe. Her hair made my fingers itch to weave themselves through its silken strands. Her neck was swanlike and made my lips long to kiss its softness. The dress she wore caressed her breasts, exposing just enough décolletage to remind me how lush and lovely they were. My hands and mouth remembered their weight and flavor and I felt my trousers grow tight. I had to look away before I embarrassed myself.

Still I knew my role in this, Alice had been quite clear. So I took a deep breath and walked to the vision before me. As I met her at the bottom of the stair I bowed over her hand and brushed her knuckles with my lips. Then I turned to the assembled company and said "Father, friends, allow me to introduce my fiancé, Miss Renesmee Cherish."

Suddenly everyone applauded and came to greet her shunting me aside and separating us from one another's side. So it was for much of the evening.

Finally, Father approached and shook my hand. Then he turned to Ness and smiled. "I could not be more pleased," he said.

"Thank you, Your Grace," she responded.

"Oh, that will never do," he complained taking her hand and placing it in the crook of his arm and leading her away. "You are about to be my daughter, please call me 'Papa.'"

She turned back to look at me, a question in her eyes. I had no idea how to respond to my father's request, so I simply shrugged my shoulders as if to say _if it makes him happy._

Ness went into dinner on my father's arm and from that point on we were separated by people, conversation, and space. She was seated between Edward and Emmett. Emmett found great sport in finding topic which made her blush. I could not hear them because of the conversations I was having with Bella and Rosalie, but I could tell when Emmett made a joke at her expense. She wrapped her fingers around the gem hanging from her neck, as if she were holding on to me. It was as if I could feel her arms around me. I found myself watching her, smiling whenever she touched the necklace. It made me feel as if I were as important to her as she was becoming to me.

"You look like the cat that ate the canary. Care to explain?" Rose asked.

"Not at all, I am simply pleased that Ness is doing so well," I fudged.

"I take it you are responsible for the lovely bauble at her throat."

"I am," I said with a sly smile.

"It is charming, and suits her well. I am glad that you have stepped up and begun to display your obvious affection for her," Rose commented.

"She is a good girl, Rose, and she will be a fine duchess. As such she will need jewelry that denotes her status. She is not used to adorning herself. I am simply trying to ease her into the role. Do not read any more into it than that," I said defensively.

Rose shook her head. "You know, Jacob, every time I think you have matured into a real man… you say something like that." With that she turned to her other dinner partner.

"I never thought you a coward, Jacob. I guess I was mistaken," said Bella from my other side.

When the meal was complete the ladies went to their tea and we men to our brandy and port. Jasper's gentlemen's lounge was a marvelous room. It was painted in a rich clay and the wood was dark and masculine. It was a place I had spent many an evening here with my male friends enjoying the sanctuary of manhood. Tonight, however, I was restless and ready to finally be able to spend some time with my intended. I did not like this forced separation.

I was standing by the window looking out into the night when Carlisle placed his hand upon my shoulder. "She is only a room away and you shall be joining her in no time."

"I know," I said offhandedly.

"There is no shame in missing the woman you love, you know," he said gently.

"Oh Carlisle, I think you know me better than that. I…" What was I? In truth I had no explanation for what I was feeling. "She is sweet, and biddable, and above all, good company. I have scarcely spoken two words to her this evening. I am merely concerned for her comfort." There, that sounded reasonable.

"Of course," said Emmett, "her comfort is in such question. After all, she is surrounded by women who adore her and pamper her. She must be squirming with discomfort."

"Be fair, Em," Jasper interjected. "The man has had to watch you embarrass the girl without being able to defend her all during dinner."

"She is an easy mark on that score. Must be the convent upbringing, eh?"

"Emmett," Carlisle warned.

"What?" Emmett asked raising his hands in surrender.

"It does an old man's heart good to see his son so besotted," my father added.

And so went the time with the gents. They shared stories of connubial bliss and how it made their lives complete. After some time the conversation turned to my nuptials.

"Alice said everything is arranged. Wednesday is the day, man. You will be a husband," Jasper confirmed. "Now all we need do is arrange your stag night, an evening of male bonding before you join us as leg shackled husbands."

"Oh," Father said from his chair, "that reminds me. I arranged for Bertie to return to my home with whatever clothes you will need for the next three days. I wish to take the opportunity to advise you, and make arrangements for the running of the estate. Besides, I am looking very forward to having my family beneath my roof. It has been far too long since the house was full of young people."

"Wait… What?"

"Yes, Bertie will have you moved in by the time we return home this evening," he said as if it were the most natural thing imaginable.

"I had not envisioned that, Sir."

"Come now, Jacob," he said convivially, "It makes perfect sense. You can look around and order any amenities that your lady may require so that all is done before she steps foot through the door."

I was flabbergasted. I had never even thought of moving in with my father before the wedding. Worst of all, Ness had no idea about all this. How could I inform her of my departure? We were still in a somewhat fragile state. I did not wish to be parted from her at all, let alone before I was certain that all was well between us.

I looked to Jasper for help. He lifted a shoulder and covered a cough.

"Father," I began, "I will gladly attend you at the house, but pray, allow me a night to see to everything at my bachelor rooms. I need to speak with the landlord and arrange for my things to be transported. Bertie is priceless, but I cannot ask him to handle everything. It is the responsible thing to do, Sir, to handle my business myself."

I watched my father puff with pride. I could not have chosen a better tack. He agreed and we moved on with the plans for our gentleman's evening.

After drinks and chatter we finally joined the ladies in the conservatory. All I wanted was to go to Nessie's side, but before I got there Alice led her to the piano-forte and bid her play and sing.

She began to play a sweet serenade about a young milk maid and her goatherd lover. The refrain soared with the idea of eternal love and I looked around at all the faces as she sang. Esme and Carlisle smiled like proud parents. Edward raised his glass and smiled. Emmett looked impressed and my father looked mesmerized.

When her song was complete we all applauded and begged for another. She sang two more before she offered to play the Barley Mow so that the couples could dance. I took the opportunity to speak with Alice, usurping Jasper's claim of first dance.

"I wanted to thank you. Jasper said you have managed everything," I said as we danced the pattern.

"It was my pleasure, and Bella and Rose helped."

"Can this evening get any longer? I have not had a word with Ness since I gave her the necklace. Thank you for that, as well. At least we had a moment. Still, you did mention a plan to allow us some time together."

"I did. Now remember, Renesmee has never danced in company. I have arranged for a few waltzes. Rose willingly volunteered to play. I have left the door to the balcony open for you and will cover with your father."

"I will have to return him home before I can truly be with my girl. He is insisting that I lay my head beneath his roof as of tomorrow evening. It will be my last night with her before we wed," I bemoaned.

"I know. I think it is wise that you have a bit of time apart before you share your marriage bed. After all, anticipation is a powerful aphrodisiac. Now go as Esme to dance, while I find my husband."

For what seemed like hours I switched partners, smiled, and conversed until at last, Rose moved toward the piano-forte. "Now, Miss Cherish, I insist you allow me my turn at the instrument."

Ness nearly leapt from the seat. I saw her face pale and she apologized. "I am so sorry, Rose, I never meant…"

"Silly girl," Rose said, "the truth is I wanted to give Jacob the opportunity to dance with you."

I took her hand and led her to the floor. Her eyes were quite large as she realized that I meant to dance with her. She looked over at my father and then back at me. "Oh, Jacob, no," she whispered. "You know I cannot dance."

"Rose has agreed to play nothing but waltzes. I shall teach you."

"But your father…" she said a bit louder than she realized.

"Knows that the nuns did not instruct you in dancing," said my father.

She blushed and nodded. I took her hand in mine and placed the other at her waist. She began by watching her feet and stepped awkwardly. "Ness, look at me. Do not take your eyes from mine. Trust me."

The music swelled and I swept her into my arms and began to twirl her about the floor. Staring into her lovely eyes I found myself caught up in the moment. I led her to the balcony. The cool air made her cheeks color and I truly looked at her. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She was like a bright, shining star fallen to earth. My breath caught and I realized we had stopped turning. I lifted my hands to her cheeks and pulled her in close, lowering my lips to hers.

I realized in that moment that she was all I had ever wanted. She was my friend, my lover, my Ness. I drew back and leaned my forehead to hers. "Three days until you are mine. It still seems too long."

"Oh, Jacob, I have always been yours," she whispered.

I looked at her an realized that she meant it. She was mine. "Forever?"

"And always."

Again I kissed her and all the world seemed right. Until I heard my father clear his throat.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

NPOV

I was floating on a dream wrapped in Jacob's arms lost in the glory of his kiss. There was an urgency in his lips, a longing and I wanted to give him whatever it was he needed. My hands wove though his hair and I let him pull me closer still. I opened my mouth to his seeking tongue and let loose a soft moan in response. Then I heard the softly cleared throat.

My eyes flew open and I leapt back from Jacob as if jolted by lightning. I turned to see Sir William standing in the open doorway. I blushed deeply and turned away, embarrassed and ashamed. Alice had been so clear in her instructions. She had warned me not to allow myself to forget my role, yet here I was. The moment he touched me I behaved as if I were raised… exactly where I was raised.

"I beg your pardon, children, but I hoped for a dance with my future daughter-in-law," he said kindly. "That is if it would not be an inconvenience."

Jacob lifted my chin with his finger, raising my eyes to his. There was a question in his eyes. He would not leave me if I refused. Still, I had never been a coward. I swallowed hard and licked my lips. Then I squared my shoulders, plastered on a smile and turned to Sir William. "Certainly, your grace, if you can overlook my lack of grace and occasional trodding upon your feet."

"Ness?" Jacob said ensuring that I was alright.

"Now Jacob," I teased, attempting to recover our ruse, "you cannot be jealous of your own father, can you? Not when you know that you are the only man alive who will ever have my affection?"

A strange look crossed his face and I thought for a moment he would refuse. But then he took my hand and led me to his father. "She is on loan, Father. I expect you to remember that she belongs to me and that I cannot bear to be long from her side."

"Of course, Jacob."

With that Jacob bowed and left his father and me alone.

"Your grace, are you certain that you should be dancing?" I asked cautiously.

"A waltz cannot hurt me, certainly." With that Sir William bowed and took my right hand in his left. I placed my left hand upon his shoulder and he placed his right at my waist. I was nervous, but I was determined not to show it. I allowed him to guide me as Jacob had and we began to make slow circles together.

As we caught the rhythm of the waltz I began to relax. It was then that Sir William began to speak. "Renesmee, please be at ease."

"I am embarrassed, sir. I know my behavior a moment ago was…"

"…that of a woman in love. I understand. As unlikely as it may seem I was once young and in love myself. I stole more than my share of kisses with Jacob's mother during our engagement." He smiled at me and I found myself returning the gesture. "Besides, it does my heart good to see that my son will be so well loved. All I have ever wanted for him is to be happy, even if it may not have appeared that way to him."

I looked at this man. He was a duke, wealthy and cultured. Yet before me was a man, plain and simple, one who wanted the best for his son. I smiled at him and nodded.

"I just wanted to thank you, my dear. I never imagined that Jacob could find someone who loved him as much as I loved his mother. She would have adored you." He stopped turning me and I saw the tears glistening on his lashes.

Without thought I leaned in and embraced him. In an instant his arms encircled me and in that moment I felt a bond begin to grow between us. When we stepped apart we looked into each other's eyes and saw a beginning.

"I'd better return you to my son before he becomes anxious about your absence," he teased. I took his offered arm and he led me back into the conservatory.

Jacob immediately came to my side and searched my face to ensure I was well and comfortable. I gave him the smallest nod and he seemed to visibly relax.

"Carlisle and Esme have kindly offered to see me home. That way you and this beautiful girl will have a bit more time to spend together," Sir William said handing me back to Jacob.

Jacob looked confused, but in an instant his confusion turned to gratitude. "That was kind of them, and you."

"Tomorrow I shall expect you by noon. We have some things to settle before the celebration with your friends. Good evening, my dear girl. I look forward to seeing you on Wednesday," he said leaning over my hand and brushed it with his lips.

We made the rounds, saying good evening and promising to be ready to focus on making all ready for the wedding.

"Now remember Jacob, I will loan my husband to you for your stag do, but you are not to involve him in anything of which I would not fully consent," Bella instructed.

"No worry there, my sweet," Edward assured her. "In fact I can promise Renesmee that I will ensure his conduct will be exemplary."

I thanked him, and we exchanged embraces with the couple. Then we moved on to Rose and Emmett. Rose kissed my cheek and whispered that I should enjoy the rest of my evening. "I shall try," I whispered back and she laughed.

Emmett shook his head and turned to Jacob saying "Women and secrets never bode well for the men in their lives. We will have a time of it with these two. The only thing worse for us will be if they begin to call each other sister."

"I already feel that Ness is a kindred spirit, I would be honored should she call me sister," Rose said defensively.

"Thank you, Rose," I responded.

"Run, Jacob, for now they shall never be separable. Should you and your pretty bride ever quarrel, look for her in the bosom of my family." Emmett said it jovially, but Rose lifted a brow as if to say she agreed.

"No need to search for me anywhere," I said, "for I cannot imagine Jacob and me quarrelling."

Esme and Carlisle embraced us both. "I shall call on you tomorrow," Esme promised.

"I look forward to it."

"And I shall marshal you and the boys to see that you all behave on your last night of bachelorhood," Carlisle vowed.

"Knowing you are there sets my mind at ease," I teased.

At length, the company thinned and all were seen off to their carriages. When all the guests had departed and Alice and Jasper had dismissed us, Jacob and I climbed the stairs in silence. He led me to the door of my dressing room and made to move away. I opened the door, and before I could enter the room he was scooping me up into his arms and carrying me through the doorway.

Jane was waiting for me, of course and stifled a grin as she saw us. She bobbed a curtsey to us.

"Jane…" Jacob began.

"Let me guess, my lord, you will not be requiring my services this evening," she giggled.

"What a clever girl," Jacob said winking at her.

"Goodnight, my lord. Miss," she said as she backed out of the room and discretely shut the door.

He carried me through the bathing room and into the bedroom where Bertie awaited. "Bertie…" Jacob began.

"Of course, my lord," the valet replied and then he too departed.

"Really, my lord, you must learn to be more assertive with the staff," I giggled.

"How about I practice with you?" he said plopping me gently on the bed.

I raised a brow at him. "Just what did you have in mind?" I asked in what I hoped was a seductive tone.

"Well… since this is the last night together as mere lovers…"

I sat up abruptly. "Last night together? What do you mean?"

"My father is insisting that I reside with him as of tomorrow. He seems quite determined. He wanted me there tonight, but I begged off. I was not willing to waste a moment with you," he said running a finger down my cheek and sitting on the bed.

My brow furrowed. I did not want what we had been sharing to end, even for a moment. A cold shiver ran through me. We had been together since I left Mrs. Cope's. I had been living a miraculous dream and I was terrified that if we parted I would awaken. He did not seem to know my fear because he began to kiss my neck and ear.

"You were wonderful tonight," he said between kisses. "You played your part beautifully. I think my father has fallen under your spell completely."

"I played no part, Jacob. I genuinely like him," I responded, although his lips were working magic against my skin. "I do not believe I wove any spell."

"You must have," he sighed as he eased me from the bed and began to undress me, never taking his lips from my skin. "There is no other explanation for the way my friends, my father, even I…" he cleared his throat, "I mean, everyone has responded to your charms. Now, enough talk, I need you."

I stepped from my dress and allowed him to remove my stays and shift. Then I turned to face him and began to release him from the confines of his own attire. I untied his neck-cloth while his fingers began to unpin my hair and release it from the intricate style Jane had woven. In a matter of moments I had undone his waistcoat and jacket. He was kissing me again and making me feel languid and liquefied. He became impatient and pulled his own shirt from his form. Then he released his fall and shucked off his breeches, stockings and smalls.

There we stood in our all-together, bathed in firelight and breathing hard. I stepped to him again and his hands once again found my skin. They ran over my shoulders and then one slipped to caress the chain upon which hung the gem he had given me. His hands circled round to the clasp, but I held the ornament to my chest and stepped away. "What are you doing?"

"I simply meant to remove it before we got too involved."

"No. Please."

"It's alright. If you wish to wear it that's fine."

"Of course I wish to wear it. You said it is a symbol of my belonging to you," I said with a slight pout. "Besides it is the most beautiful thing you have ever given me."

He smiled and stepped closer enveloping me in his arms again. "So it pleases you?"

Suddenly I realized that I had not even thanked him. "I am the most ungrateful wretch. I never even thanked you."

"Thank me now," he said drawing me closer by the chain. Our lips met and from that moment no words were necessary. He lifted me in his arms again and we sank into the bed and each other.

His lips drew me to him and we kissed as if these kisses needed to last a lifetime, rather than mere days. He traveled down my frame as if his lips were exploring uncharted territory, even though he had traversed those same paths only hours earlier. I arched into him as he found the tumescent peak of my breast. He suckled one, but not one to neglect the other he rolled it between his talented fingers. I was putty in the sculptor's hands and he molded me into a writhing mass of need.

He then kissed around the tops of my breasts and lifted the green stone in his hand. "It suits you. Do you truly like it? There is not something else you would prefer?"

I shook my head. "I have never seen anything like it. Many of the doves received gifts from their callers, but I have never seen anything that rivaled this. "

A small line formed between Jacob's brows. "Ness," he began, "you do realize that the jewelry that the doves sport is paste, don't you?"

"Of course, I have seen glass stones in every colour, but this is deeper and richer than the stained glass in the church. It is so much more colored than I have ever seen in the jewels of the doves."

"That is because it is an actual emerald, Sweet. You will be my wife, and you shall be dripping in diamonds, emeralds, sapphires, and rubies."

I gasped and my hand flew once again to the gem. "Perhaps you should remove it?"

"No, I like seeing you in it. In fact," he said shifting so that his frame covered mine, "I like it a lot."

Then he demonstrated how much he liked it by entering me with his full length. He kissed me as he moved within me and we soared to the heavens. I rose to meet his every stroke and together we reached the stars and then showered down in glistening lights as we fell back to earth in each other's arms.

For a long while we simply breathed. He continued to kiss and caress me staring at me with such an intense look that I became more and more curious as to what he was thinking. Finally I rolled him over so I was draped across his chest. I looked up at him and saw him looking at me still. "What are you thinking, so intently, sir?" I asked teasingly.

"I was thinking that the next time you share my bed you will be my wife."

My brow furrowed and I sat up a little. "I had not realized…"

"What's the matter?"

"It's just… I have only heard men use that term as an epithet."

He cocked his head at my statement. "Oh, no Ness, that was not at all my meaning. You have seen my friends and their wives. Do you think any of them would use that title without the utmost respect and admiration?"

I thought about it. There was not a one of them I could envision frequenting a house of doves. They all seemed so perfectly in love. I knew that my friends implied that they shared their husband's beds and enjoyed the privilege. I imagined that they would have told me if it weren't true.

I looked at him and saw all my dreams. Perhaps I need not fear awakening after all. "Then I shall gladly call you husband," I said lowering my head to rest on his chest and allowing myself to be lulled by the beating of his heart.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

JPOV

When I heard the throat clear I felt a rush of chilled air. Nessie flew from my arms so quickly that I felt helpless to stop her. She was blushing, her head lowered and her eyes on the floor. Then I heard my father speak.

"I beg your pardon, children, but I hoped for a dance with my future daughter-in-law, that is if it would not be an inconvenience."

I lifted her chin with my finger, longing to see her eyes. I searched her face, needing to know that she was alright with this. I would not leave her if she refused. She swallowed hard and licked her lips. Then she squared her shoulders, plastered on a smile and turned to my father. "Certainly, your grace, if you can overlook my lack of grace and occasional trodding upon your feet."

"Ness?" I asked trying to ascertain her comfort level.

"Now Jacob," she said lightly, "you cannot be jealous of your own father, can you?" It was clear her mask was securely back in place. Then she said "Not when you know that you are the only man alive who will ever have my affection?"

I felt a rush of emotion at her words. The look in her eyes read as truthful, but I had to remind myself that her words were for my father's benefit, not my own. Still I took her hand and led her to my father. "She is on loan, Father. I expect you to remember that she belongs to me and that I cannot bear to be long from her side."

I had never meant words more. I entered the conservatory, but watched them through the French door. Nessie looked demure and contrite, but my father looked charmed and affable. It was not at all what I expected.

"Relax," I heard Carlisle say in my ear, "He has no designs upon her other than ensuring your happiness, Jacob."

"Since when has my happiness mattered?" I asked sullenly.

I heard Carlisle sigh and saw him shake his head. "Your happiness has always been a concern. Now he sees a way to provide you with a partner for life. Do not fear his motives, look to your own."

"What do you mean, sir?"

"She is a charming girl, effervescent and genial. Esme, Rose, Alice and Bella find her a delight. Emmett and Edward have taken to her as well. Jasper, who I have never known to fawn over anyone other than Alice has taken the girl into his home and his heart. She fits into your world seamlessly. Even your father adores her. So tell me, Jacob, what are your plans for her?"

"To marry her, of course. To beget children upon her and live out my life in her company," I explained.

He thinned his eyes and cocked his head. "So, you get heirs, and the comfort of a warm bed. What does she get?"

"She gets a life of luxury and comfort, freedom from the life in which she was brought up. She gets to be a member of society," I said defensively.

"Interesting, I wonder if these are things that matter to her. Be careful, Jacob, should the shine tarnish on this life of cold civility you may find yourself lacking those things which make most women content."

"What things?"

"Companionship, intimacy… and love."

"She shall have companionship, the intimacy of friendship, and one day the love of her children. I shall see to it that she is happy," I vowed.

"All those things can be gotten for her without you, Jacob. Should she grow to understand that, what have you left to offer? "

I turned to look at the beautiful girl dancing with my father and for the first time wondered if I was enough for her? "She says she wants this…" I said to Carlisle praying that it was enough.

"And you, Jacob, do you want this? Or are you only marrying her to fulfill your father's edict?"

I turned back to watch her with my father. Would I have sought her out for marriage had my father not dictated it? Probably not. Did that mean that I was not grateful that circumstances had brought us together? No, it did not. There was not a moment spent with her over this past week I regretted. Well, perhaps one moment, but my regret was over my behavior, not hers. She was exactly what I would have one day sought in a wife.

"Father's edict hastened my choice, but I would hope that I would have discovered Ness's charms all in good time. I cannot imagine wanting to spend my life with another," I confided. In saying it I knew it was the truth. I was taken aback. What did that mean?

"Then I am certain that the two of you shall have a successful union. Just remember how you feel, and never treat her with less than that care."

I sighed. I would treat her well, and she would never leave me. For once I could have someone with me who would not leave.

It seemed like ages before Ness and I were free to retire to our quarters and be alone together. All I wanted was to bury myself in the warmth of Nessie's heat. I scooped her into my arms, dismissed both her servant and my own and allowed myself to touch and taste the wonder that was this woman.

I kissed her skin and breathed in her scent. "You were wonderful tonight," I said between kisses. "You played your part beautifully. I think my father has fallen under your spell completely."

"I played no part, Jacob. I genuinely like him," she responded, "I do not believe I wove any spell."

"You must have," I sighed as I eased her from the bed and began to undress her, never taking my lips from my skin. "There is no other explanation for the way my friends, my father, even I…" The words formed in my head and stole my breath. It must be a spell or why else would I be so enamored of her? I cleared my throat, what was I thinking. "I mean, everyone has responded to your charms. Now, enough talk, I need you."

When at last I slid my length into her molten sheath I opened my eyes and looked deeply into her chocolate brown orbs. They had such incredible depth of color. Her pupils were ringed in flecks of gold and the outer most circles of her irises were inked in black. I saw her strain up to meet me thrust for thrust and saw the most incredible look in them as she gazed at me. It was as if I could see her very soul and that her one and only desire was that I find whatever it was for which I yearned.

I made certain that she found her release before I spilled my need within her depths and I kissed and caressed every place upon her body I could reach without slipping from her warmth. Somewhere in that moment I looked at her, really looked at her. I did not want to leave her. Not her body, not her arms, not her side. Two days without her would be torture. She had somehow become the bright light that kept away the darkness that always seemed to return. She was my… hope.

At length she rolled me over so she was draped across my chest. I sighed at the loss of her warmth around my most intimate appendage, but I still felt the glow of her within the circle of my arms. "What are you thinking, so intently, sir?" she asked teasingly.

Suddenly my throat felt tight. I certainly couldn't tell her the truth. I would sound like a schoolboy. My thoughts scrambled for something I could admit to and decided on "I was thinking that the next time you share my bed you will be my wife."

Her brow furrowed and she sat up a little. "I had not realized…"

"What's the matter?" I had thought that a statement that could not cause her any distress.

"It's just… I have only heard men use that term as an epithet."

"Oh, no Ness, that was not at all my meaning. You have seen my friends and their wives. Do you think any of them would use that title without the utmost respect and admiration?"

"Then I shall gladly call you husband," she said lowering her head to rest on my chest. In no time at all her breath evened out and I felt her body relax against me.

I took her dainty hand in my own. It was dwarfed by the size of mine, yet it seemed to fit within my hand perfectly. The woman was in fact perfectly formed for me. Her creamy skin looked luminous against my olive tone. Her copper hair shone like a new penny and always reminded me of the warmth she brought to my life. With that thought I joined her in slumber.

Come the dawn I tightened my arms around my girl. I kissed her forehead and tightly shut my eyes. I felt her stir and attempt to leave my arms. "Stay," I whined.

"Would that I could, but I have so very much to accomplish today," she said trying to extricate herself from my arms.

"What could possibly be more urgent than my need for you?"

"Alice gave me a laundry list of things I must learn before the wedding day. My morning is to be spent familiarizing myself with our guests and the proper address for each, with Lady Esme. Rose is to instruct me on how to address staff and what to know about running a household. Bella has offered to instruct me on proper etiquette for the social occasions we will encounter at Christmas. There is so much to learn in so short a time," she sighed exasperatedly.

"You know none of that matters to me, right? I could not care less about protocol and etiquette."

She furrowed her brow and pouted a little. "But you must, I am to be your wife, and one day your duchess. I cannot do that if I remain ignorant of what society expects of me. Please do not poo-poo it."

"Oh, Little Bird, I did not mean to lessen your efforts. I am more than proud that you are so committed to this that you would study so diligently for the task. It is just…" How could I word this so as not to offend? "Your main duty as my wife is not to society, but to me."

"And what duty is that, pray tell?"

"To keep me company. To be my friend and confidant. To share my burdens and ease my days. That is what I want in a wife," I explained.

Ness looked thoughtful. "I believe I can fulfill those duties with alacrity."

"I never had a doubt," I said pulling her in for a kiss. We shared a passionate embrace and I luxuriated in the sweetness of her mouth. I smiled against her lips. "No doubt at all. You were meant to be mine."

Her eyes widened and searched my face. "I have always thought so," she said shyly.

Again I pulled her to me, kissing her and rolling her beneath me. I buried my hands in her silken tresses and began to kiss her neck, her ear, and again her mouth. It was then that I heard the soft rap on the door.

I lifted my head and sighed. "Ignore it," I instructed Ness as I returned to her skin.

The knocking became more insistent and persistent. Ness' head turned toward the sound and I growled. "Whoever it is, go away!" I called out thinking that it must be Bertie or Jane.

"Do not think to order me about in my own home, Jacob Black," Alice's clear voice exclaimed. "I have need of y our fiancé and your father expects to drop in on you at you bachelor rooms in little over an hour."

I sank into the mattress and sighed heavily. "Bollocks!" I swore. I turned to Ness and kissed her quickly. "Alas, we must to our duties, my sweet. Go and get dressed. I will see you before I must away."

"Thank you," Chirped Alice from behind the door.

Bertie dressed and shaved me in a great hurry. I pounded down the stairs to catch Nessie before I was caught out by my father. She was dressed so prettily, sitting in the beakfast room that my mind whispered that I could stay and my father could be damned, but I knew that would not do. I eased her from her seat and kissed her softly.

"Two days seems like a lifetime," she opined.

"Two days, and we shall have a lifetime, Angel."

"Your Curicle is out front, Jacob," Jasper informed me.

I kissed Ness on the forehead and bowed to her and Alice before I rushed out to beat my father to my door.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

NPOV

"You were meant to be mine." Jacob smiled.

For a long moment I basked in the glow those words engendered. "I have always thought so," I said lowering my eyes.

Again he pulled me to him, kissing me deeply and rolling me beneath him. He buried his strong fingers in my hair and massaged my scalp in a way that made me melt. He began to kiss my neck, my ear, and my mouth. It was then that I heard the soft rap on the door.

He lifted his head and sighed. "Ignore it," he growled returning his lips to my skin.

The knocking became more insistent and persistent. I turned my head toward the sound and Jacob barked. "Whoever it is, go away!"

"Do not think to order me about in my own home, Jacob Black," Alice's clear voice exclaimed. "I have need of y our fiancé and your father expects to drop in on you at you bachelor rooms in little over an hour."

He sank into the mattress heavily and sighed. "Bollocks!" he swore. He rose up and kissed me quickly. "Alas, we must to our duties, my sweet. Go and get dressed. I will see you before I must away."

"Thank you," Chirped Alice from behind the door.

I took the bed sheet with me as I exited the room. Jane was waiting for me and dressed my body and my hair. All the while my mind repeated Jacob's words _"You were meant to be mine."_ Perhaps he truly did mean it. Could it be he had some modicum of the feeling I had for him. I said a silent prayer that it could be.

We had only a few moments alone before he needed to depart, but I could not refrain from telling him "Two days seems like a lifetime."

"Two days, and we shall have a lifetime, Angel," he vowed kissing me softly.

I held onto those words over the long hours that I spent trying to learn all that my new friends tried to impart to me. They were kind and patient with me, and I did my best to learn all they taught.

"Relax, child," Esme said at the close of the second afternoon. "We will all be right there to insure that you make no faux pas that cannot be overcome."

"How many people will there be at this wedding breakfast?"

"Fifty or so," Rose offered.

I felt all the air leave my body and felt Rose, Alice, and Bella's hands on me. They eased me down onto the settee and fanned my face. "Girls, leave us for a bit," Esme said calmly and they all obeyed her. I closed my eyes and attempted to still my racing heart.

I covered my face with my hands and tried to breathe. Esme rubbed my shoulders and spoke soothingly. "You have no need to feel overwhelmed, dear. We will be right by your side. I promise no harm shall come to you. We have adopted you as one of our own. You are forever under our protection now."

I peeked at her through my fingers. "When Jacob proposed marriage I never gave a thought to entering his world. All I thought about was that he would be in my world again. I suppose that was quite foolish."

Esme smiled and shook her head. "Not at all, you thought with your heart and not your head. That makes perfect sense for a young woman in love. Not to worry, you have friends and family who are here to see to it your entrance into this world is as easy as possible. We will not let you fail."

"You really are most kind."

"No, my dear, we are not. We recognize that you are perhaps the only person alive who can reach Jacob's heart. We have all watched him withdraw from the world for such a long time. He has lived his life in fear. Always believing that he could keep people at arm's length. It is an illusion, of course. Jacob believes that he has lived his life without love when the truth is he has been loved all along. With you, however, he has fully engaged. He has made himself vulnerable. No matter how hard he fights it we can all see how much he cares about you."

I stared into Esme's beautiful face. It was clear that she meant every word she said, but I could not fathom how she could make such conclusions. "I fear you are mistaken. Jacob has been clear that he sought this marriage to fulfill his father's edict."

"Yes, I am sure he has, but you see, I have known that boy since he was in leading strings. He may fool himself, but he doesn't fool me. I believe that if you love him as you do, he will come to realize how much he needs you."

"I hope so," I sighed.

"Me too," Esme said, gently squeezing my shoulders. "Now, enough of all this. Why don't you go and have a bit of a lay down before dinner. Rest your mind and we will enjoy conversation that has nothing to do with the wedding at dinner."

I nodded and made my way up to my room. Jane helped me strip down to my chemise and I lay upon the counter plane. My mind whirled with my lessons from earlier, and more about the conversation with Esme.

Was it possible that Jacob truly did love me? He had always treated me with such care and kindness. As a little girl who had known no real affection until I met him I had completely fallen in love with him. He was my faery story hero. In my eyes he slew the dragons that held me captive. He took me on adventures and showed me treasures I had never imagined existed. Still, he never professed love. In fact, when given the choice of remaining in my life or departing from it he had chosen to go, and not look back.

My heart had been broken, but his remained intact. I still could not imagine why he had come to me with this scheme of marriage. It was too much to hope for that he might care for me in the same measure I cared for him. Still, I would love him with all my heart and hope that he would feel it.

Dinner with the ladies was lovely. We ate and talked, and laughed. When all was said and done I retired to my room. Jane had drawn a bath and I soaked away the worries of the day. Once clean and dry Jane dressed me in a night rail and I sank into the bed. Without Jacob it seemed so big and so cold. I lay there, sleep eluding me.

The carriage clock on the bedside table ticked quietly accentuating my wakefulness. Still my eyes would not close and my mind would not quiet.

It was about three in the morning when I heard something rap against the window. At first I thought the sound a random occurrence, but after the third, and then the fourth repetition I realized that someone must be throwing pebbles up. I went to the window and opened it.

There in the garden I saw him, silhouetted in the moonlight. I knew him at once. I smiled. "Jacob?"

"Ness, come down," he called in the night.

I nodded and grabbed a robe and slippers. I floated down the stairs with a lone candle in my hand, found the French doors off the library and stepped out into the chill of the evening. He stood there, arms open and I flew into them.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I felt the safety of his embrace.

He held me tightly to his broad chest and for the first time all day, I relaxed. His arms felt like home. I sighed and clung to him, breathing in his scent and cradling my head on his shoulder.

"I found sleep elusive without you and thought that you might be similarly afflicted," he said as he kissed my neck and ear. "I thought that perhaps if we said our goodnights to each other we might find rest."

As he said this he gently abraded my earlobe with his teeth. I shivered, both from the chill of the night air and the weakness I felt when he touched me.

"You are cold," he said scooping me into his arms and carrying me into the house. "Forgive me I am a selfish brute to call you out in the night."

"Not at all, I am thrilled to see you," I confessed.

He set me gently on my feet and went to the grate to build a fire. He lit it with the candle I had brought with me. It only took a moment or two for it to catch and begin to give warmth and glow to the room. Then he turned to me and held out his hand.

I stepped forward to take his offered hand and looked at his face in the light of the fire. He looked pale, and had dark circles below his eyes. I lifted my hand to cup his face. He turned into my palm and kissed it. Suddenly I understood what Esme had said about Jacob being vulnerable. He looked so defenseless, and I thought for the first time that he needed me.

"What is the matter?"

"I just needed to see you," he said leading me to sit before the fire. He held my hands in his own and caressed their backs with his thumbs. "Being in that house… Her memory is everywhere."

"Your mother?"

He nodded, avoiding my eyes. I did not want to push him so I simply waited giving his hands a little squeeze.

"I miss her more there than anywhere," he said sadly. "I admit it was nice to spend the evening with my father and my friends, but when I retired to bed… the bed was too wide, and too cold. I missed the soft sound of your breathing and the warmth of you snuggled in my arms." There was a wistfulness to his voice, and while he spoke he curled my hair about his fingers. "I seem to have grown accustomed to having you near me."

I could tell by the way he said it that he had not expected to feel that way. Still he did not move from me so I stood there basking in his words.

"I am not certain when you went from a desire to a…" he paused as if his words startled as he said them. I felt his hands tremble as they rested on my shoulders. His eyes searched my face, although I had no idea for what he was looking. Then he softly pulled me to him kissing me with a sweetness that touched my very soul.

When he pulled back and looked at me I saw something in his eyes, a softness, a longing, and a look of need. He seemed conflicted and I longed to ease his disquiet, so I pulled him to sit with me before the fire. Without thought I crawled onto his lap and nestled my head on his shoulder. "How is it you always seem to know what I need?" I asked thinking to remove his focus from whatever he was feeling.

"Do I?"

"I have always believed so. Do you remember when Mrs. Cope took my books, and you discovered me weeping in the arboretum?"

"I do. You looked so small and so sad. I thought my very heart would break in sympathy." At last I heard a hint of a smile in his voice. "You crawled into my lap, just as you have now…" As he said it I kissed his neck and gently slid my tongue up to his ear and sighed. "Well, perhaps not quite like now."

I chuckled as I began to nibble the shell of his ear and then lick the path that my teeth had traveled. "Go on," I instructed.

"You confessed to the loss of the books and begged my forgiveness," he said with increasing breathiness.

"I did, and do you remember what you did?" I asked kissing his jaw and his chin slowly from one side to the other.

"I can barely recall my name when you do that," he breathed as he caught the back of my neck and pulled me in for another long lingering kiss.

"Mm," I moaned before opening to his tongue. He explored the depths of my mouth in a way that made my bones melt. Still, I pulled back and prodded him on. "Think, Jacob, how did you remedy the situation?"

His lips were on my neck and his fingers were untying my robe. "I arranged for Monsieur Alistair to come and tutor you. I also informed Mrs. Cope that should I find any of the gifts I gave you disturbed I would have my friend Inspector Crowley pay frequent and unscheduled visits to the house."

I knew of Monsieur Alistair of course, but I was unaware of the threat of Scotland Yard. "You wouldn't?"

"I most certainly would, she had made my little bird cry. That is a capital offence."

I looked into his eyes and saw a sincerity there that made me fall even deeper. "You see," I said as my eyes filled with tears, "you always know just what I need."

"Then why do you look as if you might cry now? What have I said to upset you?"

"I am so far from upset. I am overwhelmed. No one has ever taken such prodigious care of me. I feel as if I can never repay you."

He smiled. "In two days' time you can marry me. You can promise to be mine for all eternity before my family and friends, and before God himself. You want to pay me back? Honor those vows. Be mine."

It was an incredibly heartfelt plea. I felt certain he was asking for something sacred, but that he had no means of communicating exactly what he wanted. Still, I knew that when I stood beside him at the church I would mean every word I uttered.

"I shall be yours until my dying day… maybe beyond," I promised.

"Beyond?"

"I cannot imagine that God himself would be able to part us."

The hall clock chimed four and I yawned. I tried to hide it, but as he always did, Jacob saw. "Oh, love, I must return you to your bed and get myself back to my father's house before I am missed."

"You will not join me?" I asked sadly.

"Not this night, or should I say morning? One more night…" he held me tightly and sighed deeply. "We can survive one more night apart. Then never again."

He picked me up and carried me to what had been our room. He tucked me into bed and kissed me softly.

"Will you come again tomorrow evening?" I asked.

"No, tomorrow I will be stronger. I trust that you will meet me at the church, and I cannot steal your sleep before the ordeal of facing our guests. But know that I shall be holding you to your word, Little Bird. I will make you mine and from that day forward we shall be inseparable. I…" he paused, a line forming between his brows. Then he took my hands in his and kissed them. "I'll see you tomorrow."

With that he slipped from the room and into the night. I lay there a while wondering what he might have been thinking, but in the end I fell asleep carrying his promise into my dreams._ "I will make you mine and from that day forward we shall be inseparable." _ In my dream I even heard him say _"I love you."_


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33

JPOV

I departed the room as sedately as I could, but the panic I felt made my feet all but fly out the door. Had I honestly come a hair's breath away from telling Nessie that I loved her? What was wrong with me? I must be losing my mind.

I had spent an awful night plagued with night terrors. I had awoken in my father's house pouring sweat and alone. I had slept so well over the past week that I had believed the dreams had been conquered. One night without my sweet girl had shown me what a fool I was.

The dreams were always the same with little variation. I was in a warm and welcoming place… then the darkness slowly crept in. I began to search, calling out for my mother and father. At first I could catch glimpses of them; a swish of her skirt, a flash of his pant leg. I always felt that they were near, but I could never seem to catch them. As the dream progressed I became more and more panicked. The surroundings became more and more wild. The more I chased the farther they ran and the greater the pain that enveloped my chest. In the end I was surrounded by blackness, alone in a world of pain.

I sat straight up in bed, the bedclothes drenched in sweat. I reached for Ness only to realize that she wasn't there. As always it took several minutes of deep breaths to begin to think normally. I lit a candle and saw that the clock read one o'clock. I rose, threw on a shirt and trousers and went to my father's study. I poured myself a stout glass of Brandy and downed it in one. It was how I always began the process of getting through nights like this. As usual, it did little to calm me, and even less for clearing my mind.

I sank into a chair, holding my head in my hands and tried to focus. Were this any other evening I would seek comfort in the arms of a willing wench. But this was not any evening. This was two days before my wedding.

The thought made me grin. In two days I would marry the most incredible woman I had ever known. Then it hit me, Ness. That was what I needed. I needed to see Ness. In all the nights spent by her side I had not had one nightmare, not one.

I slipped out the front door and onto the street. The air was chilled, but not frigid. I began to walk toward the Whitlock's, but soon realized that even with my great coat on the November wind would seep into my bones. I found a hack and hired it to take me the rest of the way.

Once there I scaled the garden wall and threw pebbles against the glass of Nessie's window. It took a surprisingly short time for her to come to the window. I saw her there and knew she was exactly what I needed.

Waiting for her to descend into the garden was like torture. Then I saw her enter the library, lit by the light of a single candle. She was a vision, her hair cascading down and wearing nothing but a dressing gown over her night rail. Without thought I opened my arms to her and when she flew into them as she always had I took the first easy breath of the night.

I had intended to take her back up to the room and tupp her until dawn, but somehow that was not what I did. Instead we talked. Instead she crawled up onto my lap as she had done in her youth. She spoke of the past and for the first time I heard her perspective.

I began to realize that her mere presence calmed me. The thought surprised me. For years, some of the darkest years of my youth, she had been my one bright spot. I had attempted to bury my need in the arms of the doves, but the truth is it was my conversations with Ness that kept me sane. She was the only person who soothed my soul and kept the darkness at bay.

Why had I not realized sooner? How could I have been so blind? It was her. When I had taken my first mistress the dreams had reappeared. When they tormented me the most… When I felt the most unloved… I returned to her. I would spend a few days in her company and things would brighten.

That last night that I went to her it was because I was so very torn. On one hand I had the pleas of my dearest friends to follow and protect their husbands. On the other I had my father telling me that he wanted more for me than dying on a foreign battlefield. He called me selfish. He called me feckless. He accused me of being the shallowest being on the planet.

I had only ever wanted my father to be proud of me, to find something in me worthy, but as usual he found me lacking. That evening I felt lower than I had ever felt. I was certain that whatever choice I made I would prove to either my father or my friends that I was indeed unworthy of their affection. That I was not deserving of their time and attention. I was certain that no matter the road I chose I would establish myself as the lowest form of being.

So I had sought out my little bird and asked something I had never dared ask another human being. I had sought her honest opinion of me. I remember trembling in the shade of our tree waiting for her to blast me for the unmitigated counterfeit alive.

Instead she had called me a hero. She told me that I had done a world of good if only in her own life. Looking at her I knew she was the most extraordinarily beautiful soul I had ever encountered. I was so proud of her and in that moment I knew I had to honor my friends and my sweet girl by doing what my heart told me was right.

Now, I was holding her. She was about to become my wife. Never before had I felt joy at the prospect of marriage, but knowing that she would be mine gave me the most profound sense of peace. My lips had formed the words almost before my brain caught them.

I looked up for a moment and realized that I had walked all the way to my father's house. I ran up to the master's room, where my father had placed me saying "You and Ness should have the rooms that will be yours. I have not slept up there for a long time. Please take it."

I fell upon the bed and sighed. I needed sleep. I would face my folly when my mind had rest and I could reign in my unguarded emotions.

The knock on the door came mid-morning, judging by the light filtering into the room through the drapes. I hadn't had any more nightmares and felt fresh when Bertie entered the room with coffee and the morning post. I washed and dressed, and then I sat before the mirror for Bertie to scrape the bristle from my chin.

"Good Morning, sir," he said as he began to soap my chin.

"Good morning, Bertie."

This was a ritual. I sat and he shaved. Today, however, I was a day away from becoming a bridegroom. My mind was buzzing with anticipation and a bit of trepidation. "Bertie…?"

"Yes sir."

"Why have you never married?"

His hand stilled in the midst of sharpening his blade upon the leather strap. "I beg your pardon, sir?"

"I asked why you have never married. I mean you are not a bad looking man…" Objectively this was true. "You hold a position in the house of a respected peer. Certainly you could find a wife, should you choose."

Our eyes met in the mirror and I saw him frown before he cleared his throat. "Had I wife, I would not have been able to follow you into service, sir."

I had not realized the sacrifice that Bertie had made for my care. "I am humbled by your devotion," I said earnestly.

"If I may speak freely, sir?"

"Of course."

"I think Miss Cherish is fine choice."

I looked at him in the glass and cocked my head. Bertie was the one person besides Carlisle who knew all my secrets. I often utilized him as a sounding board. Still, he had never in all our years together commented on a female in my life. He had been the one to deal with my mistresses for me were it buying them trinkets or arranging for them to leave at the end of our time together.

"Really?" I asked, curious as to his reasoning.

"Yes, sir. I find her quite charming. I also see the effect her company has on you."

"What effect is that?"

"Well," he said, "many mornings I can tell you have not slept well. You are tense, and you seem uncomfortable. Since Miss Cherish has entered the scene you smile more often. You are more pleasant and most of all, you seem at ease."

I thought for a moment about what he said and had to agree with him. I had felt better this past week than I had felt in years. I looked at myself in the glass and saw the smile I was wearing. "Thank you, Bertie I must admit I agree with you."

I descended the stairs and entered the breakfast room to find my father looking well. There was colour in his cheek and a glint in his eyes. "Good day, Father."

He took out his pocket watch and shook his head. "It is almost good afternoon, but I suppose you can be forgiven seeing as tomorrow you join the ranks of married men."

I smiled and took a plate filling it with eggs and kippers. I shared a pleasant day in my father's company and an evening with my male friends. They all touted the joys of marriage and the satisfaction of holding your own child in your arms. When I finally fell into bed I was convinced that I was making the most sensible course by marrying Nessie.

I awoke at three in the morning. I was tangled in the sheets and sweating. I breathed as though I had just finished a foot race. I guzzled three glasses of the water I kept by the bed. I tried to calm my racing heart. The dream had left me spent. I was determined to shake it and find sleep again. I pounded the pillow and rolled over. Tonight I would again lie in the arms of Renesmee and the demons would disappear.

That thought comforted me and I did indeed find slumber. It was bright and early when Bertie woke me. He said that we had quite a bit to do to make me presentable for my bride. He dressed me in a blue morning coat, a cream waistcoat embroidered with golden thread, and buff trousers. He brushed the matching top hat and shone my hessians to a high gloss. He had tied my cravat in a knot so intricate I feared being unable to free myself from it without assistance.

My father was dressed in his best suit and wore a smile that warmed my heart. As we rode to the church he turned to me and said something I had longed to hear my entire life. "You make me very proud to be your father. I know in my heart that you are today you take the first step to becoming the heir I always knew you could be."

"I shall certainly endeavor to be a credit to you, Father," I said. He nodded and patted me on the back. "Any last minute advice?"

"Be happy, Jacob, be present, and above all take nothing for granted. Time is fleeting and life sometimes hard. Do not waste a single moment for once it has passed it cannot be recaptured."

His face took on that look he got when thinking of my mother. His eyes misted and he turned toward the window to compose himself. In a moment he turned back to me and sighed. "Love her, Jacob. If you do you may have as wonderful a life as I had with your mother."

The ache that always burned in my chest whenever I thought of my mother gripped me once again. I could not imagine opening myself to such a pain again. Still, as deeply as I knew losing her had been for my father, I knew he thought it worth it. For the first time I wondered if he might be right.

We entered the church and I was met by Jasper, Edward, and Emmett in the waiting room near the vestry. I looked about and realized that Carlisle was absent. "Where is Carlisle?" I asked.

"He has taken the role of father of the bride. He said someone should be there to present her, especially since this will truly be her debut to society," Edward explained.

"Leave it to Carlisle to think of everything."

"We should go and take our seats," Emmett said indicating himself and Edward. They each shook my hand and congratulated me.

That left me alone with Jasper. He straightened my button-hole and brushed off my shoulders. "Alice's instructions," he said apologetically. "Now, for my contribution to this affair; marriage is not all sunshine and roses. You cannot expect not to have adjustments and negotiations. My advice to you is to remember what you gain today. As of today you have someone with whom share your life. Enjoy it. Are you nervous?"

"Not at all," I said truthfully.

He smiled. "Excellent! Then you know you are doing the right thing."

We entered the apse and stood waiting for my bride. When she appeared I almost forgot to breathe. She was dressed in a cream coloured dress with chiffon over skirt. Her bonnet was draped with a veil and in her hands she held a small gathering of peach roses. She was on Carlisle's arm and he nodded to me as they approached.

When she met me at the altar we joined hands and the vicar began "Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony; which is an honourable estate, instituted of God in the time of man's innocency…."

As he droned on I looked at Ness. She was perfection itself. Not only was she beautiful, but she was intelligent. She was also kind and gentle. As the vicar explained that marriage was for procreation, a remedy for sin, and mutual society I realized that I could not imagine pursuing any of those ends with another. He asked for objections or impediments to be voiced and for the first time I felt a pang of fear that someone would say something. I knew I would never allow anyone to say anything against her. She was perfection and I would willingly stand between her and anyone who did not recognize that.

In that moment I looked into her face and it hit me like a bolt of lightning. I loved her. All the air left my lungs. What a fool I had been. I thought myself immune. I fancied myself safe from that emotion. We exchanged vows and I prayed that they would save me from the loss that love had always meant to me. I meant every word I uttered and it scared me to death.

We exited the church and entered the carriage to ride to the Whitlocks'. I turned to her and kissed her almost desperately. When I pulled back I cupped her face in my hands and looked into those deep brown eyes. "We did it," I sighed. "You are mine"

She laughed in that lilting way she had. "Silly Jacob, I always was."


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

NPOV

"Jacob Black, wilt thou have this Woman to thy wedded Wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?"

Jacob looked deeply into my eyes and said "I will."

"Renesmee Cherish wilt thou have this man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?"

There was something different in Jacob's eyes, an intensity that I had not seen. I must have paused a moment too long for he raised a brow at me. "I will," I said in a clear voice. He grinned.

The vicar then asked "who giveth this woman to be married to this man?"

Carlisle stepped forward and said "I do." He had told me that as his daughter and wife had adopted me I was officially his and that he would stand in the place of a father for me this day, and ever after.

Then the Vicar joined Jacob and my hands and had him repeat "I, Jacob Black _take thee, Renesmee Cherish_ to my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to…" he swallowed hard, "love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth."

I felt a tingle travel from our hands to my heart. His voice was so strong and his gaze so intense I could almost believe that he meant the words. I did not realize until that moment how badly I wanted him to mean them. Then I repeated the vicar's words to Jacob. "I, Renesmee Cherish take thee, Jacob Black to my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love…" my voice broke and I felt the tear fall down my cheek. "And to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth."

We exchanged rings, his being an heirloom from his mother that was reminiscent of the pendant he had given me. As he slipped it onto my finger my other hand flew to my throat. Again I raised my eyes to his and the look I saw there shook me to my core. I was certain it was the reflection of my own adoration for him, but it felt so real.

I slipped a ring upon his finger. Alice, Bella, and Rose had taken me to choose it yesterday. It was a simple band, but I had chosen it for him and I wanted him to know it was given with my heart.

The Vicar led the congregation in Psalm 67 and the words struck my heart. "God be merciful unto us, and bless us; and cause his face to shine upon us…" That was what I had felt when Jacob looked at me. I felt as if I was basking in the glow of pure love.

A hymn was sung and the ceremony was concluded. The vicar led us to the altar along with Jasper and Alice and we all signed the register. Then Jacob took my hand and slipped it through his arm. He led me to a carriage and off we went to the Whitlock's to greet those invited to the breakfast.

He turned to me, taking my face in his hands and kissed me. "We did it," he sighed almost reverently. "You are mine"

I felt the happiness bubble up and I laughed in pure joy. "Silly Jacob, I always was."

He kissed me again until I almost forgot that we were headed to Alice's to meet members of the ton whom I would have to impress and intrigue. I think he forgot as well, because when the carriage stopped and a livered servant opened the door we were still lost in each other's arms. The man had to clear his throat, and even then Jacob stroked my face and barked "A moment, please," at the groom. Then he leaned into me and gave me the sweetest peck followed by a whisper in my ear of "If anything or anyone is not to your liking just say the word and we shall escape. I will protect you, always. After all, you are my wife."

"Wife" what a funny word. It was a role I never thought to play in my life. It was a childish dream that I was certain could never come true, and yet here I was. The wife of the man I loved.

Jacob disembarked from the coach, then he reached in to offer me assistance, before the groom could. He held my hand as I stepped down, but before my foot hit the pavement he had swept me into his arms and carried me into the house.

The foyer was filled with our friends. Alice beamed at me in Jacob's arms and bustled forward. "As charming as this sight is, I must insist that you unhand the girl so that we can set up the receiving line, your guests will be arriving soon."

With a sigh of regret he slid me to the floor and cupped my face in his hands. "Just remember, when this is over we get to spend weeks alone together, never having to see another soul." Then he kissed me sweetly and allowed the ladies to take over.

Alice led us to the formal dining room, an area that spanned the length of a ballroom with high ceilings and impressive place settings. There were a legion of servants standing at attention against the walls all impeccably dressed and each wearing gloves so white they hurt my eyes. I felt terribly small in this setting, and it must have shown on my face for Alice took my hand and smiled. "His Grace will be seated at the front of the line, he will make introductions. Esme and Carlisle are standing in for your parents, so they will be beside you as well. You will do beautifully, all you need do is be yourself. It will be a long morning, but as Jacob said when it is past you can run off to Wolf's Bridge and enjoy being married."

I nodded and took my place between Sir William and Jacob. The latter held my hand and squeezed it gently as our guests began to arrive in droves. Men and women dressed in visiting garb entered the room and were greeted first by Jasper and Alice as hosts of the breakfast. Next Sir William accepted congratulations and well wishes graciously. After a moment or two of this he would turn to me and introduce me as his new daughter, Lady Renesmee.

From that point on there was a steady flow of people come to gawk at the woman who had landed the most sought after bachelor of the ton.

The first familiar face I encountered belonged to Lord Call. He congratulated Sir William and turned to me before Sir William could make a formal introduction. "My lady," Lord Call said bowing over my hand, "I can hardly believe you are the same young woman I met a mere fortnight ago."

"I assure you, my lord, I am she."

"I admit, my eyes betrayed me that evening."

"I do not understand, sir?"

"I thought you a rather pretty child, had I taken the time to truly see, Jacob may have had a rival for your affections."

I laughed at his teasing, although Jacob seemed less amused. "Embry, as one of your dearest friends I must warn you such flirtatious conversations with my newly minted wife could find us at odds."

Embry smiled and shook his head. "Rest easy, my friend, I was there to witness the union. As the vicar said 'What God hath joined together let no man put asunder.'"

Jacob relaxed and shook the hand of his friend. From that moment on, however, he seemed to always have a possessive hand upon my person. It rested at my waist or upon my shoulder. He found ways to keep me close to him and allowed only the briefest exchange with our male guests. To be honest, I found it comforting. There was not a moment that I felt alone, and it made meeting all these people much easier.

After a time Sir William greeted a rather elderly gentleman with great affection. He turned to me and introduced the man as The Duke of Quilute, Sir Ateara. "His grace is a dear friend, Renesmee, and a finer man you will rarely meet."

"How do you do, your grace," I said bobbing a curtsey to the gentleman. His hair was grey and his face touched with distinction. He looked me over and smiled genuinely.

"What a lovely girl," he said. "It is a pity that my grandson cannot find himself such a woman."

At that moment, said grandson approached and sighed. I turned to face him and saw a face I knew quite well. Quil Ateara was a frequent visitor to Mrs. Cope's establishment. He was often in his cups, and occasionally playing deep in the gaming room. When he drank he would bemoan the fact that his grand sire ruled him with an iron fist and were he to know how Quil passed his evenings that Quil would find himself disinherited. I saw the recognition in his eyes and knew I had to steer him away from indiscretion of speech.

"Quil, allow me to introduce Lady Black. Lady Black, my grandson, Lord Ateara."

"How lovely to meet you, my lord," I said before he could speak.

"Funny," he said, "I would have sworn we had met before."

Jacob turned at the comment and I saw him blanch. It would not do to have Quil divulge our past acquaintance. I felt Jacob stiffen beside me and knew I had to steer this conversation away from danger before Jacob and his friend became at odds.

I raised a brow at Quil and plastered on a smile. "I assure you, my lord, should we have met before I would remember every particular, the where, the when, the circumstances surrounding our becoming acquainted. Would not you, my lord?" It was a veiled threat, but he took the hint and looked to his grandfather with obvious trepidation.

"The lady was raised in a religious order, Quil, I am certain you have never crossed the threshold of such an establishment. More's the pity. You should speak to your friend, Jacob, and ask him to steer you in the direction of so fine a lady as this," the duke suggested.

"So fine a…lady?" young Quil said, his tone dripping with irony.

Jacob turned to Quil and said "Aye, the finest lady you will likely ever meet. But perhaps if you are nice to her she may begin to introduce you to suitable acquaintances as she meets them. If you prove yourself a true friend to her, as you have always done to me." Jacob's tone was kind, but it held a warning to Quil not to expose me.

Quil seemed to mull it over and then said "I shall endeavor to do so. My hearty congratulations to you both." He sketched a bow and accompanied his grandfather into the table. It seemed that the disaster was averted.

A beautiful woman with ebony hair and a tall gentleman greeted Sir William with embraces and kisses. "Samuel, Emily, allow me to introduce you to your new cousin, Renesmee, Lord and Lady Uley."

The woman beamed and took my hands in her own. "Congratulations, my dear. You and Jacob must join us for an evening upon your return. We are family and must become better acquainted."

I felt genuine sweetness from her and smiled in return. "I think that would be lovely."

"Do say you will visit me, I should like us to become particular friends."

"I should quite enjoy that."

Lord Uley and Jacob shook hands and exchanged a brief conversation before they too joined the table. I lost track of all the names and faces that entered the room, and after an interminable time was finally escorted by Jacob to the center of the table. Sir William raised his glass and made a toast. Then we ate. There were several courses from soup to roast. Finally, Jacob and I joined hands and cut into a multi-tiered cake covered with sugared flowers.

It was past tea time when we had bid our final farewells to all our guests. We were bundled into traveling clothes and Jacob walked me out to the carriage. I received embraces and kisses from Alice, Rose, Bella and finally, Esme. They all wished us a wonderful trip, and Alice explained that Jane had been sent ahead with my trousseau and would be at Wolf's Bridge when I arrived. I took my seat against the squabs and waited while Jacob exchanged a few last words with Carlisle and his father. Then he joined me and the door was closed.

It was the first time I truly relaxed the entire day. I sank into the seat and felt the warmth from the brazier on the floor. Jacob too seemed to deflate once we were underway. We were both quiet for some time. It was not uncomfortable, it was simply that we had not had a moment of silence since the day had begun.

"Will it take us long to get to Wolf's Bridge?" I asked.

"We shall travel halfway today then take our rest at the posting inn. Then tomorrow I shall show you my boyhood home. I made arrangements to ensure that all would be in order when we arrived, but I fear we must manage for ourselves this evening as Bertie and Jane accompanied the bulk of our belongings to Wolf's Bridge. Do you mind terribly?"

"Not at all," I said honestly.

Then Jacob turned to me and took my hands in his own. He looked deeply into my eyes and smiled. "Before we proceed I need to tell you how incredibly proud I am of you, Little Bird."

"Proud?"

"Yes, there were moments today when I feared all would be exposed, but you won over every person who met you this day. You were amazing."

"I was worried when your friend, Lord Ateara, recognized me," I confessed.

"So was I, but I actually owe him a great deal. Quil was the one who told me of your predicament and all he got for it was a trouncing."

I was confused. First of all that Quil had told Jacob of the auction and further that Jacob had come to blows over the news. "Why?"

"He was speaking of the auction at the club and informed me that the virgin in question was you. In my mind you were still my little bird, a mere child and I called him a liar and swung at him." Jacob shook his head. "I truly do owe him an apology and a drink. Without his news I might not have found you in time to make you my bride."

"Oh," I said feeling that my threatening to expose him might have been unjust.

"What's wrong?"

"Lord Ateara is a frequent guest at Mrs. Cope's. He is often in his cups and has a rather loose tongue when he has been drinking. When he said he was certain he knew me I was afraid that he would blurt out the truth. So I reminded him that if he did I too had information that could be divulged. I implied that his grandfather would be told what I know. I should not have done that."

"No, I am glad you did. I have been concerned for Quil of late and have heard from Embry that he has been indulging in dangerous ways. I meant what I said, when you begin to make acquaintances among the young ladies of the ton you can make introductions and perhaps we can find him a proper bride. After all, he found me one."

With that Jacob leaned forward and kissed me deeply.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

JPOV

The carriage rocked as we made our way south to Kent. I had meant what I said to Ness. I was very proud of her. She had handled the situation with aplomb and come out of it having earned the respect of not only me, but Quil as well.

Sam had whispered in my ear that he was glad that I had found a woman who could swim the shark infested waters of the ton. He thought her charming, and a far cry above other choices. Then he asked if I was aware that Leah had blown back into town. I told him I was and we agreed to inform the other should any news come our way.

Ness grew quiet after a time. Before I knew it she had rested her head on my shoulder and fallen asleep. I eased her down until her head rested upon my lap and stroked her copper-gold hair. When on earth had I done anything to deserve this angel in my arms? I could think of nothing.

It was a strange feeling, this 'love.' There was a lightness to it, almost as if a bubble swelled in my chest and lifted me away from the gravity of the earth. No, it was more like she was gravity. I was no longer tethered to the earth by gravity, but by her. It was as if the strings that had all been snipped and instead I was bound to this small creature by steel cables. Our bond was stronger than anything I had ever felt before, and there was not a thing I would change about it.

We arrived at the posting inn somewhere around nine. My angel was still sound asleep, and although I thought some food might do her good, I hadn't the heart to wake her. So I carried her up to a well-appointed room and laid her on the bed. She sighed and snuggled into the softness. I built up the fire and crawled in beside her. When she felt the heat of my body she slid back into my arms.

It was not how I had envisioned spending my wedding night. I had thought of swiving my wife. My wife. How amazing that such a small word could have such a vast meaning. I wrapped my arms about her and buried my nose in her hair. No this was not how I had envisioned this night, but holding the woman I loved in my arms, this was a night I would never forget.

When day broke and light streamed through the curtains I smiled to find that I had again slept through the night. Nessie was the charm that sent the nightmares flying. I opened my eyes to see her lovely face looking at me. "Good morning, Wife."

She blushed. "Good morning, Husband," she said stifling a giggle.

"Are you hungry? I have arranged for a hearty breakfast before we journey on."

"I am indeed. I fear I but nibbled at the wedding breakfast. There were so many people to speak with, and I was so nervous. I wanted to make a good impression."

"You we splendid. There was not a soul there who was not utterly charmed by you. Come now, the sooner I have fed you the sooner we can be on our way to Wolf's Bridge."

We ate and I helped her dress. She combed out her hair and I tied it loosely in a ribbon. I reminded her that we were married now and that I had wished her to wear it down as often as possible. She blushed and smiled and I basked in the glow of her happiness.

We had five more hours to go. The horses could make it as long as we did not push them too hard. The day was bright and glorious. There was a chill to the air, but it was not truly cold. I had seen to it that the brazier in the floor of the coach was well fed and I sat holding Ness in my arms under a lap robe. She was fascinated with the landscape. It had not occurred to me that she had never ventured out of London. The country was foreign to her. Her face reminded me of when she was a child and I had taken her to the museum. Her eyes grew bigger and bigger as each new thing unfolded before her.

"There is so much land," she said awestruck.

"Yes, much more than in London."

"Why a body could walk for days before meeting another human soul."

"Well, that may be a bit of an exaggeration, but there is certainly a comfortable distance between neighbours."

"Does it not get lonely? Having so much breadth between people?"

She looked so serious that all I wanted was to make her smile. "If you are concerned with being lonely I shall simply have to bind you to my side while we are here. I'll not let you out of my sight." With that I pulled her even closer and kissed her deeply.

I could have taken her in the carriage. My manhood was certainly willing, as I believe was she, but I had sworn that our first coupling as man and wife would be in my ancestral bed, and would be spent worshipping her. I meant to express my love in how I treated her.

I had actually arranged for several things to please her. When we finally pulled up the drive of my family seat the servants were all assembled in the foyer. I lifted Ness from the carriage and carried her over another threshold. She laughed in the lilting tones she always used and I felt the joy bubble from within me.

"Will you carry me over every threshold we encounter from now on?"

"If it pleases you," I swore.

"It is most gallant, but honestly it makes me feel like a child. I wish to be an equal and a credit to you. Besides," she whispered into my ear, "the servants will think I am infirmed."

"No, they will think that you are to be adored. In fact I think that is exactly what they should think." I turned to the line of servants all standing at attention and said in a clear voice "Greetings, it is good to see you all. Allow me to introduce you to my Lady."

Several of the younger faces cracked in laughter. Bertie cleared his throat and they sobered. He stepped forward and said "Lovely to see you my lord," he bowed then turned to Ness and bowed again. "My lady. The staff is ready for your inspection."

Ness nodded regally and gave me a look that told me to put her down. She straightened and turned to the assembled crowd. "It is a great pleasure to meet you. I shall endeavor to be a fair and reasonable employer, but I fear it will take a bit to learn all your names. Please forgive me. Now, Bertie, if you would introduce me I would greatly appreciate it."

When I was home at Wolf's Bridge Bertie acted not only as major domo, but also as head of household. He was as much butler as valet. He introduced the grooms and the under butlers. Then he handed Ness over to Mrs. Brooks, my housekeeper. She was a stout woman who brooked no nonsense from her maids. She was, however, not nearly as strict as she appeared. I remembered how she would sneak me sweets when I was being confined to quarters for an infraction. I adored the woman and trusted her implicitly.

"Madam," she said bobbing a curtsey. "May I say we are all thrilled to welcome you to Wolf's Bridge, my lady. It has been too long since the place had a woman's touch. Should you have any questions or concerns about how the place is handled, you need only ask."

Ness smiled and thanked Mrs. Brooks. She suggested that they meet tomorrow to go over things and the leaned in conspiratorially and whispered "I will most likely require much instruction, but I learn quickly and if the beauty and care taken with this room is any indication I shall have nothing to change at all."

She could not have said anything better. Brooks bustled about and insisted that the staff get back to work. "When would you like supper, my lady? You must be starved. Traveling is a tiring business."

"It is indeed, but if you do not mind, I should love to have a bath drawn and a bit of a lie down before we dine."

"Of course, my lady," Brooks clapped her hands and two maids ran off to fetch the water. Jane was there in line and she stepped forward. "Jane arrived yesterday and has everything unpacked and arranged for you. She is a good girl."

"She is indeed," Ness said smiling at the girl.

"Thank you miss," Jane said and a gasp went up from the other servants. "I mean… My lady."

"It's alright, Jane. We will both have to get used to that."

I intervened and led Ness up the grand staircase. I pointed out the portraits of my ancestors along the walls. Then led her to the Duke and Duchess' chambers. Father had insisted that we take them, "After all, I will not have need of them. I am just as happy in a smaller quarters," he had said.

I opened the door to the lady's chambers and escorted Nessie in. This was the room that had been my mother's, but I had ordered it redone when I returned from the war. I saw it decorated in soft yellows with spring green accents. It was now bright and airy. It no longer hung in the gloom of my mother's demise. Ness looked about with wide eyes and then her eyes fell upon the canopied bed. There was a look of confusion on her face, and then a sigh. In the blink of an eye she composed herself and thanked me.

"I shall leave you to the care of your Abigail and see you for dinner," I said heading to the door, but I thought better of it, turned back, marched to her side and kissed her thoroughly. "Rest now sweet, for you will not escape my arms this evening." Then I headed to my own room to freshen up.

Bertie greeted me with a click of his heels and open arms to remove my morning coat. I sat before the huge vanitory and lifted my chin for him to remove my cravat. He tsked at the knot Nessie had produced. "Really, sir, you must learn to travel with your valet, what if people saw this?"

"I would tell them that it was tied by the perfect hands of my wife and then dare them to think ill of it."

Bertie looked at me as if I had two heads. He stood there blinking at me, struck dumb.

"What?"

"My lord," he began slowly and in a voice one might hear from an animal trainer attempting to approach a frightened lion, "are you feeling quite well?"

"I feel…" How did I feel? I felt refreshed. I felt blessed. I felt elated. "I feel married," I said.

"Married?" he said. "If you will excuse me, sir, I have known my fair share of married gentlemen and none of them struck me particularly altered by the marital state."

"Truly?" I thought about that for a moment. All my dearest friends seemed transformed by their marriages. Emmett had always been jovial and flamboyant, but when he wed Rosalie he became a gentle giant. He was docile in her hands. Edward had been a moody prig for the longest time, always walking about with a cloud of doom above his head. Bella was a breath of fresh air that lightened his entire being. As for Jasper, he was a soldier, dedicated to the art of war. He was hard and stoic. Alice opened his heart, she made him open himself to his intuition of people and he was now one of my dearest confidants. "I disagree. All my dearest friends were altered by their marriages."

Bertie opened his mouth and the closed it again. I knew there was something he meant to say, so I gave him the opportunity. "Feel free to speak freely."

"Well, sir," he hemmed, "it is just that your friends married for far different reasons than yourself."

"I know that my reasons for marrying now were less than noble, but the woman I chose… she is…" was there a word for all she was to me? "She makes me the best man I can be. She always has. With her I am a man I am proud to be."

He looked at me in the mirror, an assessing look in his eyes. "Then I wish you every joy, my lord."

I met with my steward, Mr. Crowley. He was pleased with how things had gone with the harvest and was full of ideas for preparing for spring. He too congratulated me of my nuptials. I found that each felicitation I received made me stand taller and prouder.

I found myself watching the clock willing it to speed to suppertime. Of course I wanted it to stop there so I could savour the company of my bride.

I found try to concentrate on anything other than my sweet girl was pointless. After two hours I threw down my ledgers and headed up the stairs in search of Ness. I was almost at her door when I heard her voice talking to Jane.

"Jacob likes my hair down, so you must resign yourself to it until we rejoin society.


End file.
